Class Of March 2014 Part 6
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(Copies & pasted from last thread where it wouldn't let me post):
Oh Parnell, I'm glad I"m not the only one. I love cooking, don't consider it a chore, but it was always done with a glass of wine or three. I cooked a big meal yesterday and really didn't feel that I enjoyed it the same way. Reading too, I felt like I could float away into the book & ignore the rest of the world with alcohol. I miss it so much. Last night I was reading my book trying to concentrate on the story but I definitely felt something was missing, it just seemed a less intense and exciting experience.
I did all my chores & housework this morning, and my automatic thought was "Yay that's done, now nothing stands between me and wine... oh wait... yeah... no..." I am also struggling with some serious cravings and uncomfortable memories & emotions right now, and having thoughts like "If I had JUST ONE drink now, then it would be out of my system & off my breath before my husband gets home later. No one needs to know. Just to take the edge off my anxiety..."
I want to and I don't want to. I guess that's what they mean by the AV, or the Beast. We have to not listen to it, it will kill us to get what it wants. We have control of this. I believe it will get better xxx
PS - you did awesome to resist temptation after your AA meeting
Originally Posted by parnellatwood 
THIS TIMES ONE THOUSAND. ... The laundry is so much more fun with beer. Cooking, too, I drank with that. Unfortunatley, one cannot avoid cooking or laundry, or I would. Haha.
It feels something like losing a partner. Like the person you used to do everything with is gone and now you're left doing all the things you used to do together and everything reminds you of them and makes you miss them.
I miss that imaginary person. I'm starting to wonder what the point is without them.
It feels something like losing a partner. Like the person you used to do everything with is gone and now you're left doing all the things you used to do together and everything reminds you of them and makes you miss them.
I miss that imaginary person. I'm starting to wonder what the point is without them.
I did all my chores & housework this morning, and my automatic thought was "Yay that's done, now nothing stands between me and wine... oh wait... yeah... no..." I am also struggling with some serious cravings and uncomfortable memories & emotions right now, and having thoughts like "If I had JUST ONE drink now, then it would be out of my system & off my breath before my husband gets home later. No one needs to know. Just to take the edge off my anxiety..."
I want to and I don't want to. I guess that's what they mean by the AV, or the Beast. We have to not listen to it, it will kill us to get what it wants. We have control of this. I believe it will get better xxx
PS - you did awesome to resist temptation after your AA meeting
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Cuddly Panda, I can so relate to the sense that things I would normally do with a glass or 5 of wine now seem flat. Like you, I'm on my fifth day, and am looking forward to the future when doing things without the nightly bottle feels normal.
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Originally Posted by Boobeary
Cuddly Panda, I can so relate to the sense that things I would normally do with a glass or 5 of wine now seem flat. Like you, I'm on my fifth day, and am looking forward to the future when doing things without the nightly bottle feels normal.
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Parnell & Cuddly Panda,
I get the whole cooking dinner and nightly chores thing. In fact, I have purposefully NOT cooked dinner since my Day 1 because that was my worst trigger. Luckily, I've got a freezer chock full of soups and stews that I can keep defrosting. By the time they run out (or my husband revolts), I will have a plan for how to deal with dinner... Any suggestions?
I get the whole cooking dinner and nightly chores thing. In fact, I have purposefully NOT cooked dinner since my Day 1 because that was my worst trigger. Luckily, I've got a freezer chock full of soups and stews that I can keep defrosting. By the time they run out (or my husband revolts), I will have a plan for how to deal with dinner... Any suggestions?
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Originally Posted by Boobeary
Parnell & Cuddly Panda,
I get the whole cooking dinner and nightly chores thing. In fact, I have purposefully NOT cooked dinner since my Day 1 because that was my worst trigger. Luckily, I've got a freezer chock full of soups and stews that I can keep defrosting. By the time they run out (or my husband revolts), I will have a plan for how to deal with dinner... Any suggestions?
I get the whole cooking dinner and nightly chores thing. In fact, I have purposefully NOT cooked dinner since my Day 1 because that was my worst trigger. Luckily, I've got a freezer chock full of soups and stews that I can keep defrosting. By the time they run out (or my husband revolts), I will have a plan for how to deal with dinner... Any suggestions?
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In a couple more hours I will have gone exactly one week without alcohol. I have only gone this long two or three times in the last couple years...doubtful I could have made it this far without the SR support. I am really hoping to get to Day Ten...haven't made double-digit days of sobriety since the summer of 2011...that will be a big milestone for me. You know, last week at this time I would not have believed I could make it a whole week...
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Originally Posted by Taproot
In a couple more hours I will have gone exactly one week without alcohol. I have only gone this long two or three times in the last couple years...doubtful I could have made it this far without the SR support. I am really hoping to get to Day Ten...haven't made double-digit days of sobriety since the summer of 2011...that will be a big milestone for me. You know, last week at this time I would not have believed I could make it a whole week...
You CAN get to Day 10! You don't have to hope, you can do it, one day at at time.
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Boobeary, I have no idea how to make those old associations change. Maybe we do just have to keep doing what we always did with alcohol, now without alcohol, and do it enough that it becomes a habit, and gets laid down in a neural pathways as the default way of doing things.
I've been invited out tonight, not to a booze-centric occasion, in fact quite the opposite, but it will be held at a bar and a couple of people might drink. I'm horrified at the thought of going and being surrounded by temptation and not being allowed to give in, or even worse giving in. Then I'm horrified at the thought of never feeling able to go out again, and just becoming this hermit who stays home feeling sad about not being able to handle drinking, and equally struggling to handle life without it. The stupidity of it is I've been out to these sorts of functions a fair few times in the past & not drank alcohol as I was driving! Never gave it a second thought (I guess because I always knew there was wine waiting for me at home) but it's like now I"ve blown it up into this big thing in my head that I can't get over.
Lol sorry for being so whiny at you all today. I'm finding it tough and I really appreciate all your support xxx
I've been invited out tonight, not to a booze-centric occasion, in fact quite the opposite, but it will be held at a bar and a couple of people might drink. I'm horrified at the thought of going and being surrounded by temptation and not being allowed to give in, or even worse giving in. Then I'm horrified at the thought of never feeling able to go out again, and just becoming this hermit who stays home feeling sad about not being able to handle drinking, and equally struggling to handle life without it. The stupidity of it is I've been out to these sorts of functions a fair few times in the past & not drank alcohol as I was driving! Never gave it a second thought (I guess because I always knew there was wine waiting for me at home) but it's like now I"ve blown it up into this big thing in my head that I can't get over.
Lol sorry for being so whiny at you all today. I'm finding it tough and I really appreciate all your support xxx
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Boobeary, a more serious suggestion on the cooking thing--though I haven't tried it out myself yet--is, I was thinking of taking my iPad into the kitchen with me and playing like old favorite movies or TV shows while I cook. Nothing I have to hear all the time to know what's going on, but something to occupy that little place in the front of the mind that also wonders whether it would be okay to have a drink.
That was just my sort of initial thought. If one doesn't have an iPad, obviously, another device would work.
That was just my sort of initial thought. If one doesn't have an iPad, obviously, another device would work.
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Congratulations Taproot 
I waited a long time til I went out to bars CP - I needed to feel 100% secure before I ventured into society again. Other people do it differently.
If you go tonight think about who it is you want to be..,and what kind of decisions you need to make to get there
D
I waited a long time til I went out to bars CP - I needed to feel 100% secure before I ventured into society again. Other people do it differently.
If you go tonight think about who it is you want to be..,and what kind of decisions you need to make to get there
D
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It's that first drink that gets you drunk. We don't have "one". One leads to ten. Ten leads to family disasters, hangovers, and shame.
Just make it through each day as it comes. We can all agree not to drink for 24 hours.
Speaking of which...Day 24 tomorrow.
You know how? I just didn't drink.
I know it's hard. All I have to do is not pick up that first drink and I get to have the life I deserve. Lots of people live without alcohol. I intend to continue to be one of them.
Sweet dreams, all. If you're in your first week, congratulations on a brave and wonderful thing you've done. Give it some time, the emotions and anxieties and desires DO ease up. Save your own life. You're the only one who can do it.
Just make it through each day as it comes. We can all agree not to drink for 24 hours.
Speaking of which...Day 24 tomorrow.
You know how? I just didn't drink.
I know it's hard. All I have to do is not pick up that first drink and I get to have the life I deserve. Lots of people live without alcohol. I intend to continue to be one of them.
Sweet dreams, all. If you're in your first week, congratulations on a brave and wonderful thing you've done. Give it some time, the emotions and anxieties and desires DO ease up. Save your own life. You're the only one who can do it.
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I definitely know what you mean about cooking and wine. Its just a habit that I reach for the wine bottle when im cooking. I don't like to cook unless I drink.
Ive made some pretty fantastic meals when I was d rinking. But then again I have made some terrible meals too lol.
Im at work, I took a few sips of a new drink the bartender made tonight. I had to taste test them to see if they were any good. I spit it out though
Have a good night guys!
Ive made some pretty fantastic meals when I was d rinking. But then again I have made some terrible meals too lol.
Im at work, I took a few sips of a new drink the bartender made tonight. I had to taste test them to see if they were any good. I spit it out though
Have a good night guys!
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Checking into this new thread on a new dawn here in England. Getting ready to head off to Birmingham to chair a conference and then spend a couple of hours at leaving do number 2..
Loving what people have said on here about drink number one!! That's what I need to remember today and have at the front of my mind.. With me, it'll lead to missed trains, disappointed friends, unproductive weekends and much beating myself up...
My 13th day today and it's a Friday... I'm sure there's a cinematic reference in there somewhere!!!
Strength to you all..
Loving what people have said on here about drink number one!! That's what I need to remember today and have at the front of my mind.. With me, it'll lead to missed trains, disappointed friends, unproductive weekends and much beating myself up...
My 13th day today and it's a Friday... I'm sure there's a cinematic reference in there somewhere!!!
Strength to you all..
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Join Date: Mar 2014
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Originally Posted by CuddlyPanda
(Copies & pasted from last thread where it wouldn't let me post):
Oh Parnell, I'm glad I"m not the only one. I love cooking, don't consider it a chore, but it was always done with a glass of wine or three. I cooked a big meal yesterday and really didn't feel that I enjoyed it the same way. Reading too, I felt like I could float away into the book & ignore the rest of the world with alcohol. I miss it so much. Last night I was reading my book trying to concentrate on the story but I definitely felt something was missing, it just seemed a less intense and exciting experience.
I did all my chores & housework this morning, and my automatic thought was "Yay that's done, now nothing stands between me and wine... oh wait... yeah... no..." I am also struggling with some serious cravings and uncomfortable memories & emotions right now, and having thoughts like "If I had JUST ONE drink now, then it would be out of my system & off my breath before my husband gets home later. No one needs to know. Just to take the edge off my anxiety..."
I want to and I don't want to. I guess that's what they mean by the AV, or the Beast. We have to not listen to it, it will kill us to get what it wants. We have control of this. I believe it will get better xxx
PS - you did awesome to resist temptation after your AA meeting
Oh Parnell, I'm glad I"m not the only one. I love cooking, don't consider it a chore, but it was always done with a glass of wine or three. I cooked a big meal yesterday and really didn't feel that I enjoyed it the same way. Reading too, I felt like I could float away into the book & ignore the rest of the world with alcohol. I miss it so much. Last night I was reading my book trying to concentrate on the story but I definitely felt something was missing, it just seemed a less intense and exciting experience.
I did all my chores & housework this morning, and my automatic thought was "Yay that's done, now nothing stands between me and wine... oh wait... yeah... no..." I am also struggling with some serious cravings and uncomfortable memories & emotions right now, and having thoughts like "If I had JUST ONE drink now, then it would be out of my system & off my breath before my husband gets home later. No one needs to know. Just to take the edge off my anxiety..."
I want to and I don't want to. I guess that's what they mean by the AV, or the Beast. We have to not listen to it, it will kill us to get what it wants. We have control of this. I believe it will get better xxx
PS - you did awesome to resist temptation after your AA meeting
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