Dee74

continues from here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-7-a-21.html

D

least

I'm a mom too, tho my girls are all grown and gone now. And I like my 'twilight years'. The place is just me and the critters now, but I like it that way.

lucygoose

I've had such a bad day! I was parking at the grocery store and accidentally scratched another car. It's my husbands company car! Ugh! We are getting a new one in a few weeks too. I'm about to cry! I had so much on my mind. Wasn't obviously driving correctly.

You know when you are in over your head, well that's how I feel. Too much on my plate. From kids activities, taxes, work and money stuff. At least I'm not spending money on beer!

My husband says he's not but I bet he still is. Trust is really an issue. I don't want to do this alone.

After my mom visits which she did last week. It takes me weeks to recover the wrath.

Bebetter

lucy - so sorry you are having a rough day... I know what you mean about feeling like you're in over your head. I've been feeling that way lately too.

Is your husband quitting/did he quit with you? Do you think he's drinking on the side? I would think it would be really hard to get sober with someone else - that's 2 huge changes going on, though I guess it also would make it easier since there wouldn't be booze around.

AFM - My husband and I had a snappy discussion this morning. Well, I was snappy. He apologized again, and then this afternoon sent me an email saying that he heard that people get closer when they do new stuff together, and suggested we do something without the kids like go skiing (haven't been in 20 years!) or rock climbing (indoor). What's ironic is that I've been trying to get him to do stuff with me for months, and he's always totally wishy-washy about it, saying we have no money (oh, but we DO have money to spend 35+ a week on beer?). Anyway, I'm not going to point that out to him, since that seems a little childish, but neither am I going to make any of the plans. I always feel like I'm dragging him to do stuff, and that's worse than just staying home, because if he doesn't want to do something, he's a pain in the a$$. This time, it's on him.

new star

Not feeling well at all today and having the two kids here isn't helping, wish I could sleep, seeing as I was up all night.

Lucy I'm sorry you're having a bad day, no good about the car!! Eeeeek. Best thing u can do is not drink, and get thru it best you can. Here to listen.

Bebetter sounds exactly like hubby and I, he's always complaining about the cost of activities together, sigh.

Hi Least!

lucygoose

New star- so sorry your feeling ill...the worst is being sick when you can't lay down because of your kids!!! I remember having the flu and a baby. I couldn't even walk. My husband had a meeting and left me crawling on the floor. It was ridiculous! Thank god he's home tonight so he can pick up our son from tennis. Seriously, I don't think I could do it!

Bebetter- thanks for the encouragement!

It's so great to have a forum to vent. Thank you ladies!!! It means the world and my health!!!!

Xox

Dollyangel17

Hi all!

Been crazy busy the last few days, so just catching up now.

Welcome Lucy! Congrats on your sober time and glad you joined us!

Be better...I would have been ticked about hubby sharing a beer too in that instance. Glad he apologized.

Babs...congrats on avoiding that happy hour and coming here instead. When I stayed at hotels I too found it so difficult not to drink, and one time I last summer while at a hotel dealing with anxiety, I had actually bought a bottle and had it in my purse at the ready, but came here instead and read all night. Never cracked the seal on that bottle and tossed it the day after:-)

More blasted snow here, and I had the commute from Hell coming home from work, but after work tomorrow I am off again until next Monday due to school vacation. Looking forward to spending quality time with my little girl.

Hope you all are having a good night, and hi to New star, Sissy and Lady of course:-). Hope I didn't miss anyone:-)

new star

Just at the drs and had to fill out a new patient form...not sure if it was cheeky but when it said are you a drinker I wrote no!!! Lol

Ladybug2

Hi ladies,

Sorry some of you had bad days yesterday. Hope today is much better! I've been rather moody lately. Feeling great one minute and irritable and impatient the next. Maybe PMS? I have no desire to drink, which is good. I've gotten out of the habit of going to the gym so maybe that has something to do with my moodiness? Going to start back up tomorrow. No more excuses.

Hope you are all doing well. Anyone hear from KC or freethinking?

SoberLife2014

Hi ladies,

I hope all is well. Ladybug I hear you about mood swings. I hate them! I've been doing well lately but I've been feeling really tired. It all started a couple weeks ago right before my birthday. I felt like I had tons of energy before, but now I feel tired even after a decent night of sleep. I changed my diet and started exercising a couple months ago so I'm not sure if that's part of it. Anyway, I've still been able to get things done during the day. I've been having some cravings lately. I guess the other day at that icehouse was a trigger. I haven't had any desire to drink alone at home, but I keep imagining myself on a beach with a whole bunch of beer and just friends or my husband. The odds of that happening are 0 right now so that's good. I would really like a vacation, so maybe that's all it is. We are going to visit my hometown next month so that's our vacation. We are also going to virginia for my sister in laws wedding and my hubby said we can squeeze in a day or 2 in NYC so I have that to look forward to also. Plus there is a beach just an hour south of us. Maybe I can talk my hubby into taking me there.
Otherwise I'm feeling good. I'm working on my SMART recovery and I'm very excited about it. My husband started working at a new location with his company so his commute went from 3hrs round trip to about 45min which is awesome. I'm hoping he won't be so stressed out now. I hope you are all well and I look forward to reading your posts!

JustSarah

In packing hell right now - will check in properly soon

Hope all u mummy's are ok

I think I may have a nervous breakdown soon - If I remember.

Xx

Babs78756

Hey there mamas...

Home last night and did my best not to wake up the monkey when I got home - even though I really wanted to. I can't wait to pick her up from day care today. My husband left to NYC today and I'm on my own until Friday. Of course my company is having a happy hour at our office tomorrow night. It's annoying but I'm already playing it out in my head. I have to go because we are bringing in a new candidate and I'm the only one in leadership that hasn't met her. I had totally planned not to go. Oh well, I guess we have to get used to these challenges but I'll certainly be checking in all day.

I booked an appointment with an acupuncturist that my girlfriend said changed her life. She was having terrible anxiety and panic and said he really helped her. I've made an appointment for Friday. I've heard acupuncture can address addiction issues, hell, I'll try anything. I think for me, its about having an array of support to pull from and to quiet the annoying desire to lose control. I actually thought to myself, "Maybe I should pick up smoking again?" "Can I smoke pot? I wonder if I should ask someone if its okay if I smoke pot sometimes?" Because that's normal right?

I didn't realize but tomorrow will be 3 weeks for me. Thinking I'm going to go get a massage at 30 days. Some nice little treat...

Bebetter, I'd say don't linger on the past. Take your hubby up on the offer and go along with whatever he suggests. Give him a win and maybe he'll reciprocate more often?

I pm'd KCBF. She's still here and she's coming back....

It's been a few tough days for us... lets shake it off and get that good juju going again.

Babs78756

Can I just say I hate that my co-workers start opening beers everyday at 4:00. The sound of twist of the cap gives me anxiety....

okay, moving on.

SoberLife2014

Hang in there ladies! Babs stay strong. It's great that you were able to stay sober on your business trip. Find that strength for your office happy hour!

kcbf

Hi everyone!

Yes, I am still here. Sorry, was out of touch the past few days. Had a weak moment on Valentine's Day, but I am picking myself back up again and not giving up. I am a little down and having a hard time accepting that I just cannot drink. I have been telling myself I can handle it, but clearly I cannot if I can't manage more than 7 days without alcohol. I HATE ALCOHOL!!!!!!!!! My relapse, did not turn into a multi-day binge, which is good. Still, I am frustrated and angry at myself. I feel like such a failure and like I just don't seem to get it like everyone else.

I have been out of the office all day and not able to get to a computer. But, I am back in now and SR is the first place I came to post.

Anyway, I am working on it tonight. I have plans to go to Yoga and a meditation class. I need to find a replacement at night for the time I spend drinking. I think a Hot Yoga class by candlelight sounds like a good plan.

Hope everyone is doing well. I feel like going home and downing a box of wine tonight! I have had a tough few days at work. I am really struggling with being happy at my job right now. I recently changed jobs and realize the grass ain't always greener. My previous job I was at for 8 years was with a great company, well known in our community, lot of prestige, great benefits, I was well liked by senior management and operations and had so many good strong relationships and now I am at the bottom of the pecking order if you will and at a company where there is a lot of nepotism and a strong "girl's club" if you will. They either like you or they don't. If they don't then you are shut out. I am trying hard to stay neutral. But, I am not nearly as challenged as I used to be and feel like I am stuck and stagnant in my career.

Anyway, I hope everyone is having a great week so far. I have a lot of catching up to do on here to see where everyone is at.

Babs, thanks for reaching out to me and for our concern and for sticking with me and encouraging me not to give up!

Check in soon ladies.

Bebetter

Zelda - welcome back! I'm glad you're here. Why the job change, since you liked your last job and had a good place in the business? I hate all the chatter among women I work with. I work only a few hours a week, but EVERY time I go to work, I hear someone badmouthing someone else. I am neutral, but that usually means I hear something from everyone. Last night, it was so bad that I decided to make it my policy to say something nice about someone to someone else every single time I walk in the building.

Babs - Um... I think you were away when I actually came here and admitted that I DO do that. I have absolutely no issues with pot, and can take it or leave it, and do use it occasionally when I want that kind of escape. It works for me, and I think it's helped me stay sober these last 8 months (if you can call it sobriety). In my post about it, I said I can use it anywhere from once or twice a week to once or twice a month and it never consumes me and I never wake up feeling like ****, and I never wake up regretting something I did, and I never wake up needing it again. I sometimes thing "maybe tonight I'll have some," and then I get into doing something and completely forget about it - that never happened with alcohol and me. If I even thought I was going to drink, I would definitely drink... so, it sounded like you were joking, but it works for me.

Dollyangel17

Hi all...

Off tomorrow and Friday so my weekend starts now:-). Heading to an American Girl store tomorrow with my daughter for a friends birthday party. Should be fun, but hoping I don't need a second mortgage before we leave there:-)

In the past I would be dreading this as I would have to refrain from drinking in the morning so that I could drive her there (and by "refrain" I mean only have two drinks). It's so nice to be free of that!

Well, it's almost tea time, so will check back in soon

new star

Hi girls,
Pretty sick here with laryngitis and a chest infection. No desire to drink at all which is probably the only positive of being sick.
Oh KC, stay with us, no judgements here, we are all here for you! Xx
Back to bed for me (it's 12.30pm) hubby has taken the day off to look after the little one and do school run so I can rest.

new star

Can you guys access pot easily? Can't get it over here..

Ladybug2

Hi ladies,

It's been a trying day here. Just your typical 4 year old toddler stuff, but geez has it been a long one. In the past, I would have murdered a bottle of wine after a day like this, but today I dealt with it and didn't use alcohol as my "reward". I may have yelled more and been more impatient than I would have with a glass or 5 of wine in me, but I know in the long run I will be glad I got through it without escaping to a bottle.

KC, so glad you are back. Please don't feel like a failure and you are wrong about everyone else "getting it". I joined SR last April and still haven't completely gotten it. I really think the key is learning something from each relapse/slip. Put the Valentines Day slip behind you and try again. You can do this

Hope everyone else is doing well. Sarah, I have moved so many times and always felt like I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown while packing. It will all get done