walkingwithgod

I wish I had the courage to go to AA. My therapist thinks it is a good idea, but I am scared and ashamed of myself.

2granddaughters

Call the AA number in your local phone book. Talk to someone there.

You will find that we were all scared to death when we first came to AA. I bet the local AA's will send someone around to pick you up. It's always easier when we do it with somebody... we're not alone.

Take the plunge.... it just may be your lucky day.

All the best.

Bob R

ford1967

We are afraid to go the first time once you are there you will see how welcome you will feel and how you will relate to others
What do you have to loose but you have a lot to gain

karilynn27

I think you do. I found a group of people who accepted me just as I was when I walked in AA. I also found a way to rid myself of the years of shame and self loathing by working the steps.
There is no shame in asking for help

Mizzuno

I assure you that the people in the rooms felt the same way at one point in time. The idea is actually more scary than the situation itself. All walks of life are in those rooms. Give it a try. The worst that could happen ( Im serious when i say this) is that you get a bad cup of coffee.

FreeFall

WWG maybe you could try an online meeting first so you'd know a little more about what to expect. There are forums and posts here to help you get started too. Everyone is in the same boat, I don't think anyone will judge you-they can relate to what you're feeling.

silly

I don't do AA now but I've been to a ton of meetings in the past. So, I've had my own first meeting and seen countless others attend their first meeting. Most of us are scared, have no idea what to do, don't want to be put on the spot, want to be a fly on the wall, etc. Well, you can! You can go and say nothing at all. If it's a discussion type meeting, you can simply and politely pass ("I'm just going to listen today").

But if you want, you can also raise your hand at the beginning of the meeting when the meeting chair asks if anyone is attending their first AA meeting. Is is scary? yup. Was my heart pounding in my chest? yup. I believe I cried. But that simple act opened up a lot of doors for me. Because I got phone numbers, I got a warm welcome, I got people who were willing to show me the ropes.

It's up to you what you do once you walk in those doors. But it's worth a shot.

SunnyFlower

WWG-My first attempt to go to AA was very difficult for me too. I sat in my car debating the issue, trying to talk myself out of going in. It was a battle. I was scared and I felt so alone.

I went on in. Turns out I was an hour early and there was one man there, setting things up, getting ready for the meeting. He invited me in, sat me down, offered me coffee, and asked How can I help you?

I poured out my troubles, he listened, explained a little about AA and Alcoholism and encouraged me to stay for the meeting. I did. Listening to everyone's heartfelt stories was good, when it came time for me, I told my story and bawled. (I hate crying in front of strangers) There was a brick lifted off my shoulders. They all welcomed me with open arms and I felt at home.

No one shamed me, in fact they told their stories of "shame" which helped me to believe they could really relate to mine.

WWG- They will treat you the way we treat you, with love, and understanding...the only difference is you'll not only feel their sincerity, but you will also "see it". F2F

The have a saying I find qite amusing, "Try AA for 6 days, it you don't like it we'll refund your misery". 6 days of meetings will definitely give you a good idea of AA and whether or not it will benefit you. My guess is...If you like SR, you'll like AA.

It's definitely worth a try and I'm glad you are considering it.

Best wishes!

walkingwithgod

I am so scared to go to AA. I guess it is the fact if I go I am accepting that I am an alcoholic. I know I am, but to me going to AA will confirm it. My therapist really thinks it is the best thing for me. I want to get better, but SR and therapy alone are not doing it. I am just so confused and ashamed that I did this to myself. I have a great wife and daughter, and I don't want to lose or ruin their lives.

mfanch

I never got enough courage. It was desperation that finally got me in the door.

heath480

Please dont be afraid to go to AA walkingwithgod.Call the local helpline,that way you dont have to do anything on your own.

hypochondriac

I felt the exact same way, in a way it was the last hurdle. I had loads of anxiety before I first went because I knew I was doing something positive for my recovery and my AV kicked off big style. You won't regret going Phone up first and I'm sure someone will meet you before hand. That really makes it easier x

IWillWin

WWG - I'm going to a meeting today. I've only been a few times in the past during my previous battles to get sober. I've been doing ok this time with SR sand determination, but I smart enough to know I can't do this alone forever.

Worst case, I go and have coffee and listen and never dock back because it is not for me. Best case, I find a wonderful home group of people who understand what I'm going through and are available to support me.

I will let you know how it goes...my prior experiences were not positive, but I'm willing to give it another go and see what happens. Let's do this together. If you can find a meeting today go...and we can share experiences later when we get back. Feel free to PM if you like

silly

Sounds like you've got plenty of reason to go. And let's be honest, going to your first AA meeting can't be the scariest thing you've done or that you can imagine, right? I'm kind of guessing losing your family would rank a bit higher on the scary scale....

Mizzuno

I was thinking this was the case for you. The dreaded confirmation. Some prescribe to the thought that they are in control and that they can choose to abstain from alcohol. Some prescribe to the mind set that this is a disease and that there will never be a cure, daily maintenance is required to live a life free from alcohol. What ever you decide is up to you. It is your truth and nobody can decide that for you.

For me, I would give anything a go especially if I felt like i was on the verge of losing or ruining my families life. One meeting can not hurt. It's better than than what you have been doing. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is considered insanity. I do prescribe to that thought.

walkingwithgod

I want to thank all of you for the comments. I am 34 and middle class, will there be similar people there?

jobei

Just going to AA won't confirm you as an alcoholic my friend, nor will anything else, other than yourself. AA can and will offer you many solutions to the problems that you are facing, if you are willing to accept the program. Just going to check out one meeting won't be the end of the world right? I hope you do!

jobei

Most likely there will people from all ages/classes there. Alcoholism does not consider such factors.

Weasel1966

Walking. I did the same thing. I go to therapy every Thursday. Started last January. I joined SR in April. I thought that was enough. I thought I could do this with out impacting my life or being inconvenienced in any way. I love my routines and I don't like them disturbed.

I was wrong. Dead wrong.

I started aa on October 1 and I was scared sh!t. I said nothing. Did not smile. Made sure no one spoke to me.

I felt like crap because being there with "those" people made me feel superior and not an alcoholic. After all I am a professional and make a lot of money. I am respected by others and never my character comes into question.

But on October 2nd. I drank.

I went back October 3 with a humility about me. It was not easy. I had to keep reminding myself I am one of "those" people. And those people are doing something I seemingly cannot do with SR and therapy.

I have not drank. I feel supported by a sponsor I call every morning. I have a meeting at 2 I don't want to go to at all. I would rather pick poison ivy than go to it.

But I am sure I will drink if I don't. It's routine to drink and it does not scare me.

That's a lie. It does scare me.

AA scares me less than drinking now.

Hope you find the courage. It's worth it.

K

Mark75

Those are two things you never have to feel at an AA meeting, especially that second one...