crazybabie

I have a question I am hoping someone may be able to help me with. I have an AH. I knew he smoked pot and later he started taking pain pills then he added zanax to the list that I didn't know until late 2009 when hebecame very hateful and stayed gone a lot. Later that year he told me he did not want the responabilities of a wife any more so I moved out. He would not sign divorce papers.

Around 8 months went by and he came to my house crying I have been with him since I was 15 I am now 46 I have seen him cry 3 times in all those years once when his dad died, then when our son overdosed and was on life support and the day he came to my house. We talked and I agreed to let him move back in.

Obviously, I am here because things changed. he texted me last night saying he would be home in a bit that he was drinking and taking zanax, Needless to say he never came home.

My question is in your experience in using have you ever found some drugs make you more hateful than others? I am not even sure if you would be aware of this. second question is, is it possible he gets upset at himself and then gets hateful with me to make him feel better?

I rarely say anything to him about his nights out as I know there is no use.

Thanks,

likehappiness

Unfortunately addicts and alcoholic are very selfish people. With that comes resentments that they have and all they care about is feeding their addiction especially if it is accessible. People and thinks that they care about fly out the window and they do not mean much to them while they are using.

It is interesting that he doesn't do it in front of you because I am sure he is ashamed of his addiction and behavior. I am not sure if certain drugs make a person more hateful. I think emotions are all jagged while doing drugs. You will have to decide if you want to live life this way. Addicts are thieves too both emotionally and realistically. Stay safe and take care of you.

Stopdropburn

That is a tough question. like is right. Often the things people care about most seem to fade into the dark when addiction takes over. I can say he's probably feeling terribly guilty and ashamed which is why he just doesn't come back. Most likely doesn't want you to see him all messed up....I was often the same way. In the times I've used Xanax, I found, ironically, that it often made me more edgy in certain situations....most people relax, and I did, but I had a shorter temper as well. It was a catch 22 - I'd be irritable when it was gone, and orritable because I took it. It seems common in drinking too.....some people are more chipper and outgoing, others get bitter and closed off. Everyone has their own reactions to different drugs. I hope everything works out for you guys. Take care

crazybabie

I truly appreciate you taking the time to share with me.