So proud today!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 24
So proud today!
So today i was really overwhelmed at work & had a case of the f- its. I have been clean for 28 days today from pain pills. So i took off for a 'quick errand' from work & headed to my old hook up for just 1 pill to "get me through the day." While i was driving i had a moment of clarity (& divine intervention) and came to my senses telling myself over & over "it won't make u feel better, it will make u feel worse!" I turned the car around & came back to work. I am so happy! That was a close one. Now i'm off work in 30 minutes & its bible study tonight. I sure have a lot to be thankful for today!!
!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 24
Hi everyone! So today is 28 days clean, except for 1 7.5 pill in a weak moment. I had such a hard time yesterday and almost went and bought, but turned around & didn't. I thought well today will be better, but I struggled today too. I wanted to use several times today but didn't. I prayed just as many times & by the grace of God I didn't give in. I sooooo tired, ya know. Weeks of strength, days of weakness, and back to strength again! My goodness, will this ever stop? When will the weeks of strength go uninterupted, by these never-ending days of weakness? On the plus side (for those of u following my "16 days roller coaster" post) I dumped my daughterpain elixer yesterday from her surgery as she is no longer in pain & on reg tylenol now. I never took any of it during the 6 days it was in the house but wanted to really bad! I can't believe I had the strength to dump it instead of keeping it for myself. I could have cud my husband was at work, but I dumped it down the drain real quick like a bandaid before I had time to think about it. So if I just did that & resisted it the whole time it was here, why do I want it so bad now?
I don't know? I used for so long, and this is the longest I've gone sober in years, but how do u get rid of that desire for any kind of mind altering substance or escape?
Thanks for listening & contests to all of u fighting the fight & winning!!
I don't know? I used for so long, and this is the longest I've gone sober in years, but how do u get rid of that desire for any kind of mind altering substance or escape?
Thanks for listening & contests to all of u fighting the fight & winning!!
Luweez
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 117
Good for you! That was a big step. I've been really struggling with urges this week myself and I'm not sure how I have fallen but everyday is a day I'm earning my life back so I'm keeping up the fight.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
