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The codeine has left the building!

Old 01-07-2012, 09:39 PM
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Smile The codeine has left the building!

I'm now 24 hours with no codeine! I flushed what I had left, last night; I wanted to hang on to them sooo badly, but I know if I did, I would have been dipping in for "just one or two" to take the edge off.

Some of my withdrawals got underway when I started to taper off; as of now, my bones hurt, which is pretty bad, since I've had arthritis since childhood. I'm hitting the Immodium, but not as much as I expected. TMI, but a side-effect that I wasn't expecting was peeing every 20 minutes - I think my kidneys are excited to get rid of all of the stuff I was taking lol! The nausea is something I wasn't prepared for. I haven't thrown up, but I'm living on Gravol.

Emotionally, I'm good and bad. I have times when I'm depressed and miserable, and times when I'm giddy to have taken such a step. I feel very lonely, since I can't get online except for late at night. I'm very glad that my dealer moved across town, since I know I wouldn't be able to resist anything he might have, codeine pills (50 mg pure codeine, evil little buggers that I devoured when I could get them), Percocet, whatever. I have plans to get counseling, but right now, looking at life through clean eyes kinda sucks at times.

I'm going to pick up some milk thistle this week. I've also used alternative and Chinese medicine for years, and there are various remedies to detoxify the liver and other areas, which I'm doing as much as I can. If anyone is interested in the Chinese medicine part, a Google search of "traditional Chinese medicine" + liver (or any other area) should turn up a fair bit of info. Black cohosh (herb) gets things "warmed up" and flowing in the liver, so I've been taking that, I need to get to the store for other herbs that I'm out of.
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Old 01-09-2012, 02:30 PM
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Good for you WordGrrrl! It's a great thing you did. Isn't funny how dull and grey the world looks without our drugs? That feeling will pass though and after you will see the world in a much better light. I know from my own experiences it was like a valley. Alot of ups and downs. Prolly more downs than ups but it's strange how things seem to turn out alright when you do the right thing for yourself. Counselling is a good idea too. It helps to have someone to talk to that won't judge you. Sometimes just having someone sitting across from you and listening to as you think out aloud and correct you when your thinking is wrong is an invaluable tool. I've only seen my counselor twice and he pretty much just sits there and listens to me think out aloud and only says something when I'm way off but that sometimes has meant the difference for me personally. Anyways keep us posted and good luck!
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Old 01-09-2012, 11:04 PM
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Tummy troubles seem to be easing up, no nausea today! Wicked migraine, though, and sinus pain. I still feel like a slug, everything still hurts, but I can remember why I'm doing this. Weird dreams last night, though - in my dream, I had access to pills, and it seemed so real, I could even taste them. Weird. So, in a nutshell, still miserable, feeling lost without pills, and wishing I could just sleep through this (or go back in time and never get hooked on this junk in the first place!), but I'm staying on track.
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Old 01-10-2012, 11:21 PM
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I have 4 days clean now! I'm hoping that the worst of detox is behind me; I'm starting to feel human, a little bit, and just hope it gets better. FWIW, I wouldn't recommend tapering if at all possible; I had every miserable withdrawal symptom while I was doing it, and it seems like all I did was prolong the misery.

Physically... I still have aches and pains. I have loads of fun chronic pain disorders. The arthritis in my knees has been a killer. I'm terrified of what's going to happen when I start a new cycle, having endometriosis. I wish I knew how much of this was pain from withdrawal, and how much is pain that I'm going to have to just live with.

I've been craving things, especially in my sleep; I quit smoking a few months ago, but now I'm dreaming of smoking, along with pills. Tonight is not a very good night. I'm exhausted - WordBaby is going through a lousy sleep stage, and DH had a hissy fit earlier because WordBaby wouldn't go to sleep. I was trying to sleep because I have to deal with it at 3:00 every morning, so I wanted a bit of sleep under my belt, but DH came in with a cranky baby. I couldn't calm him down, and brought him back out, because I'd taken my regular medication, and was falling asleep. DH got so crabby that I just stayed up; once WordBaby was finally down, I was awake enough that there was no point in going to sleep until his feeding. So here I am, while DH is snoring and I want to smack him (kidding... sort of... lol). Of course, I'm thinking how much better I'd feel if I had something. So, I guess, a good day and a bad day, both at once (good, because no matter how much things suck, I haven't gone looking for pills!).
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