SaraMichelle

I dont have this incredible urge to use like i used to, maybe I'm just board. I'll have 3 months on the 8th. I guess part of it is that i just saw my best friend a few days ago, i had to ask her to leave because she had drugs on her. she jsut started using about a year ago, shes 7 months pregnant with her 5th kid, still using and just had her other 4 taken away in may. you'd think that would make me NOT want to use, and it does. i guess it's just knowing drugs were here have been messing with my mind. guess I should hit a meeting! Any tips?

Brockant

My sponser told me around three months that "the disease cannot stand any action taken agianst it" this includes going to meetings, calling someone reading...ive found this to be true...the best being take it to a meeting and share about it. You may have the disease, but you dont have to fight it by yourself.

Best wishes

Spica

Hang in there SaraMichelle!!! We all have triggers that throw us off our path of recovery. These boards are full of wisdom on how people have managed to work past the "urges" that can sometimes overwhelm.

Every day clean is a win. Some days are harder than others but it can be done. Running to a meeting helps some - others post here often.

I made the mistake of walking into one of my acquaintances houses two days ago to pick something non drug related - I did not know they had just been doctor shopping and there were over a hundred oxys sitting on a table right in front of me.

I came up with an excuse to leave very quickly and got my idiot brain out of there before I could hear the siren song from those little blue bastards (oxy 30mgs). Luckily for me I am just coming out of a hard detox so the pain and anquish are fresh in my mind. My danger triggers are when things are going well and I forget the pain and suffering and degradation I felt when oxy took over my life.

If and when I get my life back together and start posting about thinking it wasn't that bad I hope you will still be here to remind me going back out to use is NOT worth it...

Good luck to you - keep fighting the good fight!!!

SaraMichelle

you know, i am still here right now and that says a lot! usually i would be desperate to use, have called everyone possible to use and here i am, i stuck it out! I was an iv meth user and i have had some pretty scary experiences, i actually landed myself in the hospital a few times...once, i had Rhabdomyolysis, where i did too much and severly damaged my liver...had i have done just a little more i would have gone into liver failure, anyways...It makes me afraid to use! tonight when i thought of that rush, i kept thinking of how scared i was those times i was in the hospital. I am so grateful my son and i are still together, if i go out again, it can only get worse. My son is still happy and young enough to have only good memories...thanks for the support, tomarrow we are off to a meeting!

Thanks for posting and sharing, congrats on making it out of there! Its a hard thing to do! I hope like you said, i can be here to return the support given to me

Spica

I am thrilled to hear that you were able to abstain - sometimes it takes the pain of remembering what we went through. Thank goodness you were able to survive your ordeals.

I was lucky to find an NA meeting close by that is not preachy but truly relates to the addict and embraces every new person. It has made a huge difference for me as I work through my recovery.

Your son is adorable (I am assuming that is him in the pic).

Here is wishing you both many, many healthy happy years together!!!

SaraMichelle

thanksa bunch, Im all teary-eyed!

I have met some great people at meetings and am looking foward to catching up...thank you for the good wishes! Am sending some your way too