flux

Hi everyone, I'm new here. I have been sober 11 months from a 3 year long addiction to painkillers (Norcos were my favorites, but I'd take any form of hydrocodone or oxycodone that was available to me). It was, on average, a 6-8 pill a day habit that ruined my health, alienated me from the whole world and left me broke. I moved myself across the country to a place where I knew no one because as long as I had connections, I couldn't get off the pills. So it's been almost a year now, and I'm happy, I really am. Except for the dreams. At least 3 nights a week without fail, I dream about pills. Stealing them, being given some, finding some I had forgotten about, a fantasy world where it's totally ok to take them, all sorts of scenarios. If it weren't for these dreams, I wouldn't think much about pills at all, outside of the quick passing nag feeling when I'm in a bad mood or in an annoying situation. But the dreams plant seeds of longing and unhealthy thought in my head for the rest of the day. I wake up craving and sad, and they won't stop. Has anyone else experienced anything similar? How do I make it stop?

It feels good to be here, and I look forward to getting to know all of you. Thanks for reading.

Spica

Hi there, I have not been clean long enough to do the dream thing yet but I did hear one person share about exactly the same dream scenarios. He noted that it scared him but another friend popped into the conversation and noted that they are just dreams - substances took over a big part of his life and they were still going to haunt him but when they came he remembered all the horrible things that eventually drove him to quit his usage and that helped some.

Keep posting here as you go through this - there is a lot of wisdom on these boards and I am sure someone will be along shortly who will be able to share how they made it through.

Please have in there ...