Struggling bad today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 8
Struggling bad today
I just cannot get it together. I quit the oxy after my husband found out that I got inot them again. I'm on day 6 of no Oxy. I've had a horrible migraine, NO energy. I cannot sleep. My house is a mess. I went off the Wellburtin because it was killing my sex drive (sorry for TMI) but thats back but I have no energy. I don;t know if I should go back on the wellbutrin. I don;t know weather to just let it go and hangout today or push through. I got offered a job so I have to stay clean and develope a life without the blue devil pills, but cannot keep stop think about when he gets his script filled ago so I can just get a few to get me to get the house in order and bills straighten out. I was sooo proud of myself. I had a huge busy weekend, sleepover b-day party for my daughter on Sat. Night with 12 girls, family party for 20 on sunday, interview and dinner with family on Monday and drove to the beach for the day yesterday. Maybe its' just timing. But I feel like I'm dieing from no energy.
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
77, Please re read your post, especially the last two sentences. No wonder you feel like you have no energy! Sometimes our feelings don't reflect reality, but they DO inform us about our relationship with reality. You've got a lot of good going on, and as addicts, dealing with any feelings is scary and overwhelming, even good feelings. It's a skill we are unpracticed in, but we get better at it every day we don't use and stay connected to reality. sounds like you are off to an amazing start!
You, me and the kitchen sink all KNOW that taking tranqs will NEVER give us more energy, that is just plain physiology. One day at a time, we don't have to deal with all of eternity yet. we don't have to drug ourselves into oblivion. You sense of energy will return as you allow yourself and learn to feel good again.
You, me and the kitchen sink all KNOW that taking tranqs will NEVER give us more energy, that is just plain physiology. One day at a time, we don't have to deal with all of eternity yet. we don't have to drug ourselves into oblivion. You sense of energy will return as you allow yourself and learn to feel good again.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: land of sunshine and pill mills
Posts: 272
Congrats on your clean time! Please come on over to the Kicking the Ox thread for more oxy support!
Welcome!
Anyhoo - when did you stop the Wellbutrin? Was it with your dr's guidance? If not, I would strongly urge you to discuss with your Dr. The oxy withdrawal is enough to throw your entire body AND brain out of whack. Stopping the WB may be contributing to what you are going through. Just my opinion and I urge you to discuss with your dr.
Opiates stop your sex drive. I mean nada. Nothing. No can do. So, if that is a concern, again, please talk to your dr. about the wellbutrin.
Blessings to you this day!
Keep going! YOU CAN DO THIS!
Welcome!
Anyhoo - when did you stop the Wellbutrin? Was it with your dr's guidance? If not, I would strongly urge you to discuss with your Dr. The oxy withdrawal is enough to throw your entire body AND brain out of whack. Stopping the WB may be contributing to what you are going through. Just my opinion and I urge you to discuss with your dr.
Opiates stop your sex drive. I mean nada. Nothing. No can do. So, if that is a concern, again, please talk to your dr. about the wellbutrin.
Blessings to you this day!
Keep going! YOU CAN DO THIS!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 3
Hey all...Glad to have found this site; will try to find the oxy thread. I went to detox June 20th and my "official" clean date is June 26th. Problem is I am still trying to find the high I think, and I can't seem to get this through my head. I got Ambien from my doctor and will take about 3 at night; I know in talking to my sponsor this is still addict behavior, and my sposnor and recovery friend tell me to throw it out, but I can't. I am having such a hard time "getting it." Thanks for the support...
Stephanie
Stephanie
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
Hi stephbmc,
Here's the link to the last post on the oxy thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...pt-3-a-11.html
Your addictive behavior is no surprise to anybody here. Congratulations on your clean time! Recovery is an active process, as you can see, and the more you can do in that regard, the better.
Do watch out for traps. The ambien may be one of them. But, I am not a "purist" where "clean" is defined, some here are, and I think if you are taking your medication as PRECISELY described for you, then you are following a medical regimen that should not particularly be disputed. When you stop taking things as directed, which is how I got into trouble with oxys after surgery, then you're headed for trouble.
Surround yourself with people who care about your recovery, and ditch the rest. Make sure you are not accountable only to yourself, and you will have a better chance at staying clean. Most of all, organize your life so that you do not have ACCESS to drugs. You can't take what you don't have.
Keep posting, ask questions, offer experience, seek or give support. This is a great place for all those things.
Ft
Here's the link to the last post on the oxy thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...pt-3-a-11.html
Your addictive behavior is no surprise to anybody here. Congratulations on your clean time! Recovery is an active process, as you can see, and the more you can do in that regard, the better.
Do watch out for traps. The ambien may be one of them. But, I am not a "purist" where "clean" is defined, some here are, and I think if you are taking your medication as PRECISELY described for you, then you are following a medical regimen that should not particularly be disputed. When you stop taking things as directed, which is how I got into trouble with oxys after surgery, then you're headed for trouble.
Surround yourself with people who care about your recovery, and ditch the rest. Make sure you are not accountable only to yourself, and you will have a better chance at staying clean. Most of all, organize your life so that you do not have ACCESS to drugs. You can't take what you don't have.
Keep posting, ask questions, offer experience, seek or give support. This is a great place for all those things.
Ft
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 3
Thanks so much FT for the great words of wisdom. I will click your link for the oxy thread. I would say for the most part I am taking the ambien as prescribed. Sadly I have noticed when I don't eat, I get more of a "feeling" from the ambien and when I take it that way, I find will then take 2 or three, which is bad. I too was prescribed the oxy for an injury then surgery and unlike non-addictive personality types, wanted that high more and more 
Thanks again...
Steph
Thanks again...
Steph
RIP Maria
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: AR
Posts: 7,654
Hi Steph: Welcome to SR. I hear you on wanting to keep substituting pills to try and get that feeling you are looking for. But this is SO wrong. If you are taking the ambien to help you sleep? You can go to walmart and buy melatonin right off the shelf to help you with this. It won't leave you looking for more of a feeling. You'll just hopefully get a good nights sleep.
As of last Thursday I had six months clean from Hydrocodone 10mg. I've been on and off these things since 1985. I've had multiple injuries and surgeries.
There are pain pills in our house right now, because my husband has to use them. But I KNOW what happens when I take them, so I avoid them at all costs. YOU have to learn to do this too since your husband gets pills each month too. They are HIS, NOT yours. Have him put them in a lock box so you have NO access to them. This will help him understand you are trying to not use.
Get yourself to meetings and get some phone numbers from ppl in order to start a support group you can reach out to. It's very important to do this early in your recovery. This is when we are the weakest and fall for anything that will give us a high. Your last post SCREAMS at me that you are on thin ice. The addiction monster has you by the roots of your hair and is trying to suck you back under.
Start you a calendar with little gold stars for every day you've gone w/o a pill. Look at this daily as many times as you have to so you can see your progress. This will also help keep you accountable for when you are thinking about taking something. You'll have to rip all those stars off that calendar and start over.
Your energy level will improve. The opiates just make you think you are feeling energetic, but it isn't true. I've gotten WAY more done off of them than I ever did while strung out on them. Your mind is so focused on the opiates right now you can't think past them. Start slowly with the stack of bills you have piled up. Pull up a chair in front of the TV or turn some music on. Just pick up the first envelope and take care of it. Then do this with a dresser drawer that needs sorting out. Or a junk drawer. Do things to occupy your mind and you'll also be getting things cleaned up around the house. It doesn't have to be major physical jobs. Just start with little jobs. Your mind is way more active than your body is in the beginning.
Best of luck to ya
TOD
As of last Thursday I had six months clean from Hydrocodone 10mg. I've been on and off these things since 1985. I've had multiple injuries and surgeries.
There are pain pills in our house right now, because my husband has to use them. But I KNOW what happens when I take them, so I avoid them at all costs. YOU have to learn to do this too since your husband gets pills each month too. They are HIS, NOT yours. Have him put them in a lock box so you have NO access to them. This will help him understand you are trying to not use.
Get yourself to meetings and get some phone numbers from ppl in order to start a support group you can reach out to. It's very important to do this early in your recovery. This is when we are the weakest and fall for anything that will give us a high. Your last post SCREAMS at me that you are on thin ice. The addiction monster has you by the roots of your hair and is trying to suck you back under.
Start you a calendar with little gold stars for every day you've gone w/o a pill. Look at this daily as many times as you have to so you can see your progress. This will also help keep you accountable for when you are thinking about taking something. You'll have to rip all those stars off that calendar and start over.
Your energy level will improve. The opiates just make you think you are feeling energetic, but it isn't true. I've gotten WAY more done off of them than I ever did while strung out on them. Your mind is so focused on the opiates right now you can't think past them. Start slowly with the stack of bills you have piled up. Pull up a chair in front of the TV or turn some music on. Just pick up the first envelope and take care of it. Then do this with a dresser drawer that needs sorting out. Or a junk drawer. Do things to occupy your mind and you'll also be getting things cleaned up around the house. It doesn't have to be major physical jobs. Just start with little jobs. Your mind is way more active than your body is in the beginning.
Best of luck to ya
TOD
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: NoVA
Posts: 8
Have you thought about a medical detox? Mayabe it's past the point that it would be neccesary.. It worked for me and I was about 2 weeks past heavy opiate and benzo use when I went to detox. Either way, I want you to know there is hope... I was a slave to oxys for years and thought it was the way I'd live till I died. In the end I needed a 28 day inpatient program and entry tight in to Alcoholics Anonymous. I got a sponsor and got to work with him. I've got over a year, so I can say that whatever I did worked.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is ask for help but your making progress by posting on these forums. Keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is ask for help but your making progress by posting on these forums. Keep putting one foot in front of the other.
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