justbme

Hello Everyone, I am new to this forum. I found it when searching for help through Narcotic Recovery. I am addicted to pain pills. I was on Norco last summer for oral surgery and like how it made me feel so much I started stealing my husband's norco. Then he was switched to Oxy when we moved to another state and I got addicted to them. Got help because withdrawls were SOOO bad. Now we are back in our home state (lost jobs) and he is working but I have had no luck yet. I suffer from depression and high anxieties which I have been on meds for this a long time. But without insurance I could not afford all of them and so I went back to old habit...husband back on Norco (he didn't like the oxy for medical issues) and I have been stealing them again. Norco 10mg 2x a day for about 3 weeks. Today will be my first day not taking any. I want to stop taking anything that is not mine and also stop the stealing (guilt kills me). I can't tell DH cuz last time when I did...he was ready to kick me out...said I was just like a crack head (which is true) so confessing to him is not an option. Alcohol is actually my first drug of choice but God Willing July 3 will be 2 years without that (had 6 years once but blew it) but I visited that forum also and for help and advice with withdrawls, knowledge on narcotic abuse I came here too.
Thanks for listening...I may be on here a lot today since it is day 1. Live with mother-in-law right now so can't talk to her either. I am planning to attend my first AA meeting in a looooooooong time tonight at 6:30 at my old "home group"...ironically ran into an "old timer"from my group yesterday who really wants us to show up tonight. DH says he doesn't think he will...doesn't need to...ofcourse not. MHO is he has his narcotics so no desire to drink. We were at the race track Sunday (drag racing) and every time they announced the "bar" was open "grab a cold one" I wanted to go straight over there. So I do need an AA meeting and I believe it will help with the narcotic addiction too. MHO they both serve the same purpose....escape reality, more confidence, etc. etc. Again thanks for listening....sorry for the rambling.

tbeit

Sounds like you know what has to be done. I realize you dont have health ins right now but you may need help from a Dr. Try not to be too hard on yourself. You can do this!