Hydrocodone
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3
Hydrocodone
Hello -
I'm in my early 30's and I had to move back in with my parents because of a bad relationship which ruined my career/school plans. I don't have any children but I'm currently at home trying to figure out my future. It's difficult at this age, and especially hard for me to deal with a long distance boyfriend calling me every day, and also just the tension of living with my parents. I started getting migraines in 2004. I also developed stomach/digestive issues around that time. I had a lot of stress and repressed emotions from my relationship and being in a strange city.
I went to the doctor a couple times for the migraine and had two different prescriptions which I couldn't stand since they made me nauseous. So dealing with daily headaches became the norm for me and changed my lifestyle dramatically to the point where I was staying indoors almost every day. One day my mother, who takes hydrocodone apap (I think its 10mg) for severe rheumatoid arthritis, said "Why don't you take one of my pills?" At first I refused. She had offered once before and I tried half and threw up. But this time I took one and I felt a lot better.
She gave me one more and I split it in half that first week and didn't use it until a couple weeks later for some reason I took the half. I don't remember how it got to 1/2 every 2 days but that's what happened. I didn't want my mother to know that I started taking them. I hadn't even told her about my success with the first pill. From then on which has been about a year or so, I have been going into her room and taking one from the bottle on her dresser every day. Then it got to the point where I'd take a pill from her room in the morning, cut it in half, eat half in the morning. About 3-4 hours later I'd have the other half. Then I'd go back into her room again and get another one or two and cut them in half ....
So the most I ever took was 4 in one day. I only did that for 2 days. During that day, I noticed her prescription was getting low and I didn't want her to notice that I was taking them, so I didn't have any for a day or two. It was a sudden stop, so I did experience withdrawal, but got right back on the my 2 a day 3 days later.
Then she got the prescription filled and I couldn't believe my relief. I thought to myself, "Well, I won't take as many from now on." and justified taking the pills again every day. So I tapered it off to at least 2 a day. Usually 2.5 or 3 in the past 3 weeks or so.
During the time I was taking them, I felt very good. My anxiety about the relationship was calmed. My creativity was heightened. I felt able to "cope" with the migraines, and the length and severity of the migraines decreased drastically. I did begin to notice that I had "rebound" headaches a few times, if I took more than 2 a day. But this only happened about 2-3 days. Otherwise, taking 2 pills a day was great for me.
About 36 hours ago, I took my last pill. (Not because I wanted to. My mother's prescription is running out again.) Yesterday, all day I grappled with going into her room and having the nerve to take one of the 4 remaining pills, even though I'm sure she would notice the missing pill. I took the pill at one point, and then chickened out about it and put it back. So I didn't have a pill all day yesterday.
Today I woke up and obviously haven't had one either. My mother takes about 2 a day as far as I know, so we've been (unknown to my mother) "sharing" the prescription, and I don't think the doctor or my mother have noticed because it always seems to run out on time.
I'm not feeling too well. So I was wondering what anyone has to say about any of this. I don't know if I should just try to take this as a cold turkey detox and quit altogether, but I will miss not having migraines daily. I'm sure there will be more pills available within 24-36 hours when my mother fills her prescription. I guess I also just need some support right now, because although my dosage wasn't very high, I am suffering a bit right now with diarrhea, cramps, chills, irritability, anxiety, sleeplessness, restless legs, heartburn...
Thanks.
I'm in my early 30's and I had to move back in with my parents because of a bad relationship which ruined my career/school plans. I don't have any children but I'm currently at home trying to figure out my future. It's difficult at this age, and especially hard for me to deal with a long distance boyfriend calling me every day, and also just the tension of living with my parents. I started getting migraines in 2004. I also developed stomach/digestive issues around that time. I had a lot of stress and repressed emotions from my relationship and being in a strange city.
I went to the doctor a couple times for the migraine and had two different prescriptions which I couldn't stand since they made me nauseous. So dealing with daily headaches became the norm for me and changed my lifestyle dramatically to the point where I was staying indoors almost every day. One day my mother, who takes hydrocodone apap (I think its 10mg) for severe rheumatoid arthritis, said "Why don't you take one of my pills?" At first I refused. She had offered once before and I tried half and threw up. But this time I took one and I felt a lot better.
She gave me one more and I split it in half that first week and didn't use it until a couple weeks later for some reason I took the half. I don't remember how it got to 1/2 every 2 days but that's what happened. I didn't want my mother to know that I started taking them. I hadn't even told her about my success with the first pill. From then on which has been about a year or so, I have been going into her room and taking one from the bottle on her dresser every day. Then it got to the point where I'd take a pill from her room in the morning, cut it in half, eat half in the morning. About 3-4 hours later I'd have the other half. Then I'd go back into her room again and get another one or two and cut them in half ....
So the most I ever took was 4 in one day. I only did that for 2 days. During that day, I noticed her prescription was getting low and I didn't want her to notice that I was taking them, so I didn't have any for a day or two. It was a sudden stop, so I did experience withdrawal, but got right back on the my 2 a day 3 days later.
Then she got the prescription filled and I couldn't believe my relief. I thought to myself, "Well, I won't take as many from now on." and justified taking the pills again every day. So I tapered it off to at least 2 a day. Usually 2.5 or 3 in the past 3 weeks or so.
During the time I was taking them, I felt very good. My anxiety about the relationship was calmed. My creativity was heightened. I felt able to "cope" with the migraines, and the length and severity of the migraines decreased drastically. I did begin to notice that I had "rebound" headaches a few times, if I took more than 2 a day. But this only happened about 2-3 days. Otherwise, taking 2 pills a day was great for me.
About 36 hours ago, I took my last pill. (Not because I wanted to. My mother's prescription is running out again.) Yesterday, all day I grappled with going into her room and having the nerve to take one of the 4 remaining pills, even though I'm sure she would notice the missing pill. I took the pill at one point, and then chickened out about it and put it back. So I didn't have a pill all day yesterday.
Today I woke up and obviously haven't had one either. My mother takes about 2 a day as far as I know, so we've been (unknown to my mother) "sharing" the prescription, and I don't think the doctor or my mother have noticed because it always seems to run out on time.
I'm not feeling too well. So I was wondering what anyone has to say about any of this. I don't know if I should just try to take this as a cold turkey detox and quit altogether, but I will miss not having migraines daily. I'm sure there will be more pills available within 24-36 hours when my mother fills her prescription. I guess I also just need some support right now, because although my dosage wasn't very high, I am suffering a bit right now with diarrhea, cramps, chills, irritability, anxiety, sleeplessness, restless legs, heartburn...
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: southeast
Posts: 111
Hi...I have been in a similar position. It was my RX, I had after a serious surgery. But after several months I started using more & more. I was in pain. It relieved my pain. But I kept needing more, & I was constantly counting my pills. I soon figured out my pain was coming from trying to stop the pills not the surgery. So I went Cold Turkey. Spent 5 days having a terrible flu.
Access is the biggest problem. IMO you need to let your mother know that you are using her pills. And that she needs to keep them somewhere you can't access them. She loves you & I would think respect you for being honest. And appreciative that you are stopping this before it goes to a whole new level.
With the amount you are currently using, your detox probably won't be bad. But if you don't quit now it will get worse. Opiates are very addictive and dangerous. You are experiencing that highly addictive lure now.
Addiction is progressive. It will get worse.
Keep posting & let us know how you are doing.
Access is the biggest problem. IMO you need to let your mother know that you are using her pills. And that she needs to keep them somewhere you can't access them. She loves you & I would think respect you for being honest. And appreciative that you are stopping this before it goes to a whole new level.
With the amount you are currently using, your detox probably won't be bad. But if you don't quit now it will get worse. Opiates are very addictive and dangerous. You are experiencing that highly addictive lure now.
Addiction is progressive. It will get worse.
Keep posting & let us know how you are doing.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
I totally agree with BarelyHere. Access to these pills needs to stop, and your mom will understand what happened. In fact, so would a doctor if you went there and explained what has just happened with your migraines. It helps doctors a lot when they find out what helps and what doesn't, and the fact that the hydros help your migraines will help steer them in the right direction to finding a non-narcotic that will work for your migraines.
I don't think you have to do this alone. Get your mom and your doctor on your side, and you need to get proper treatment for your migraines. There are new things on the market you can try. You might want to see a neurologist instead of a regular doctor, because many family practice docs treat "basic" migraines, but don't know how to treat the ones that elude the run of the mill drugs they are used to prescribing.
So, my advice: tell your mom. She will understand. And get your butt to a doctor to treat your migraines. You don't have to suffer through this, and they will even help you with your withdrawals from the hydros. You aren't on a high enough dose to be embarrassed about.
Good luck, and keep us posted!
FT
I don't think you have to do this alone. Get your mom and your doctor on your side, and you need to get proper treatment for your migraines. There are new things on the market you can try. You might want to see a neurologist instead of a regular doctor, because many family practice docs treat "basic" migraines, but don't know how to treat the ones that elude the run of the mill drugs they are used to prescribing.
So, my advice: tell your mom. She will understand. And get your butt to a doctor to treat your migraines. You don't have to suffer through this, and they will even help you with your withdrawals from the hydros. You aren't on a high enough dose to be embarrassed about.
Good luck, and keep us posted!
FT
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 19
Hi June75, I too was sneaking my husband's pills and the first time it was oxy (last year) and i did confess and went to dr and felt soooo much better with the relief of guilt and sneaking and getting help. BUT ...I have for the past 3 weeks been stealing his Norco (hydrocodne not as strong as the oxy thank God cuz the withdrawls from the oxy made me VERYsick) and I cannot let him know cuz when I told him last time he wanted to kick me out (married 17 years both recovering alkies almost 2 years sober from that) and I can't risk that now. We lost our jobs in another state and are back in our home state living with mother-in-law. DH found job quick..me not so luck still unemployed. I am going to attend my first AA meeting in a loooong time tonight. Drinking is my first drug of choice but stealing pills was easier. I have suffered sever depression and extreme anxieties for years and these stupid pills made it all go away when I couldn't get my meds due to no insurance. I am now back on my right meds and today is day 1 with no norco yet. Pray I make it 24 hours which would be about 1pm today. I will be on the forum a lot I think.. Good luck to you and keep us posted I need to see success.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,677
justbme:
A lot of people feel like their depression goes away on opiates, but what they really do is give you a fake feeling that nothing is wrong. Under that fake feeling, the real stuff still goes on, while the opiates eat away at whatever resilience you had left. By the time you realize what is happening, you are addicted and depressed again, and eventually no amount of higher and higher doses will work anymore.
Your feet are barely stuck in the tar at 3 weeks of abuse, so please get out of the tarpit now before you sink in so deep it becomes nearly impossible to get out. This cr@p will suck you in fast and hard, and you won't even know what hit you.
I would be honest with your doc AND your husband, but if you can't be that then you'll have to suffer through withdrawal alone. Your doc won't know why your other meds aren't working as well as they should if you don't be honest, and an adjustment to your doses might be necessary, I don't know.
Don't feel bad, since opiates are highly addictive, and with access right in front of you it will be difficult not to take them when you start feeling sick in withdrawal. You've got to remove ALL access to the pills, which means you husband MUST know about this. Please do it now. If he finds out you failed to confide in him about your relapse, then where is the trust in your relationship? The damage to the trust cuts far deeper than any addiction can go.
Please don't take any more of your husband's pills. You don't have to be an active opiate addict, and believe all of us here when we tell you that it GETS WORSE QUICK.
FT
A lot of people feel like their depression goes away on opiates, but what they really do is give you a fake feeling that nothing is wrong. Under that fake feeling, the real stuff still goes on, while the opiates eat away at whatever resilience you had left. By the time you realize what is happening, you are addicted and depressed again, and eventually no amount of higher and higher doses will work anymore.
Your feet are barely stuck in the tar at 3 weeks of abuse, so please get out of the tarpit now before you sink in so deep it becomes nearly impossible to get out. This cr@p will suck you in fast and hard, and you won't even know what hit you.
I would be honest with your doc AND your husband, but if you can't be that then you'll have to suffer through withdrawal alone. Your doc won't know why your other meds aren't working as well as they should if you don't be honest, and an adjustment to your doses might be necessary, I don't know.
Don't feel bad, since opiates are highly addictive, and with access right in front of you it will be difficult not to take them when you start feeling sick in withdrawal. You've got to remove ALL access to the pills, which means you husband MUST know about this. Please do it now. If he finds out you failed to confide in him about your relapse, then where is the trust in your relationship? The damage to the trust cuts far deeper than any addiction can go.
Please don't take any more of your husband's pills. You don't have to be an active opiate addict, and believe all of us here when we tell you that it GETS WORSE QUICK.
FT
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