FT

I've only been on this forum for three months, and as a "people watcher" it has been interesting to me to see the way groups form on here, just like "out there."

• Number 1

There's the "good old boys," consisting of people who have obviously been here a long time, given the # of their posts and date joined, which are usually closely paralleled.

• Number 2

Then there are the "newbies," exuberant posters like me who have been here less than 3 months, who sometimes step on other people's toes because we don't know better yet; but we kind of stick around because we are under the illusion we are "helping" somebody, but we're really helping ourselves.

• Number 3

There's the "up and comers," who blast a few posts for a few days or so, usually insulting somebody, maybe getting in trouble from Admin or not, say some outrageous things anyway, then you never see them again.

• Number 4

And there are the "lurkers," or "watchers," who may never post, but when they do it is just a "quick dip in the pool."

• Number 5

Finally, there is the "mutual admiration society," who consist of one or all of the above, but usually from the first group. These are the guys who give a big thumbs-up "Thank You!" for somebody's post. The novice poster probably thinks that if you don't get a "thank you," then probably nobody read your post. Nope. But when you GET a "vote," it might mean you made a "new friend." If you don't get ANY "votes," nobody liked what you said. Go away.

This post is not meant to be a criticism, but I'm sure I'll get blasted by somebody for doing it.

I have become the most interested in "the mutual admiration society," because it seems to be some kind of "voter system," implicitly approving, or disapproving by absentia as the case may be.

I have observed that the "thank you's" do not necessarily mean that it was a good post at all, but kind of identifies the other members on the same "team" as the poster, a kind of message of solidarity.

I am not asking ANYONE to agree with me. I've just been interested in how few times I get even a single thank you for a post. What can this MEAN? Don't tell me, I don't want to know.

larrylive

I have always thought they should have an "I agree" button, because thank you isn't always the right sentiment.

As to the "grouping" I certainly don't see it as a conscious occurance, but as in life we become or can become segregated into variously labelled demographics according to our beliefs, actions and attitudes. But I would suggested taking a step back and considering why anyone would qualify to fit into any of the "groups" you mentioned. Particularly if it means whether or not to heed the offered advise.

I am not sure which catagory you would put me in, but hopefully it will include the words caring and recovered.

Be well,
Larry

FT

Pretty much ALL of Group One has been immensely supportive and welcoming. I ALWAYS heed their advice, and feel honored they answered me when they do. (thanks you guys who probably know who I am talking about)

My analysis probably has more to do with "social networking" in general. We live in a world of Facebook, which is quite an amazing way to organize one's life. I'm a 59 year old university student in a sea of 20 year olds, and everyone but me is texting continually, and EVERYONE has a Facebook page.

Maybe SR needs a thumbs up, thumbs down, and maybe, "HI, I visited," or something.

Like I said, I'm not trying to insult anyone. I just was sharing my observations of the unique way human beings organize themselves, without even realizing they are doing it.

Kind of like bees.

FT

PS - NO Facebook page for me. I refuse to participate. Let everybody else post their naked pictures and then 20 years from now say to themselves, "Oh my GAWD, what did I DO?"

Just joking. But it happens.

Timebuster

Nice thread FT,

I have always thought they should have an "I don't agree" button, because thank you isn't always the right sentiment.

I'll take a crack at number 2.

It's not a illusion FT, you are "helping". And I am proof of that. You have help me tremendously through your journey, writings and posts. Personaly, I want you to stick around. You have alot to offer here at SR, make no mistake about it. About stepping on toes, I wouldn't worry about that so much, I step on enough toes and had more threads and post deleted since I was a exuberant "newbie" in 04, that I lost count.

This is my motto these days....Ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.

The "good old boy"

TB

P.S. I want you to know, the Thank You button has only been around just the last few years.

Gmoney

Interesting thread!

I, too, have pondered some of the views you've expressed and I think it's unanimous that a thumbs up or 'I agree' would be more appropriate or specific. But I guess it's better to understand than to be understood...so when I see a 'thank you' I see it as others agree and not so much as folks grouping or banding together. I believe we can agree on many things and disagree on many others without falling into any category.

I guess I'd be considered a gool old boy because I've been around a while, but just like anyone else...I may step on a toe ot two - not because I didn't know any better, but because I'd prefer to give it to folks straight with no sugar coating.

I love the 'lurkers' because some of them drop a priceless pearl when they do have something to say.

G

MelissaNoDrugs

If I would dare offer advice, I would say don't read too much into the "thank you's" and sense of approval one might get from "thank you's" to a post.

Post for yourself! to get stuff off your chest, to express a desire, to complain, whatever...we are all just a bunch of addicts trying to recover.

FT

As I have said many times before on this forum, some of the healing is in the telling. Maybe ALL of it.

ForwardMotion

I too, haven't been very sure of the Thank You button, I've been kind of using it like the "Like" button on facebook. I'm not sure if I'm not using it correctly, but I have used it to everyone who's responded to my posts because I am thankful for advice I'm given. I'm soaking up what seems to help me and leaving the rest. I also used it in the thread with the jokes because they made me laugh, and I was thankful for that.

Everyone, so far, the "good ole' boys" and newbies alike have been so very helpful...in fact a couple of the posts I could identify most with was from the newbies. I guess because they've been where I was more recently and can recall it more sharply....as the hangover is just fading and the sorrow is still there. The "oldies" are helpful with the advice on how to stick it out for the long run....they've learned how to avoid temptation and are full of sage advice. I love it all.....I need it all.

Dee74

Its very easy to get hung up on the thank you button...this is not the first thread or post about it.

Some use it, others don't.

I use it various ways....sometimes I use it as a 'right on' button...other times it's a 'hey I read your post' button...and sometimes my hand shakes or slips LOL.

Generally, if I don't agree with a post, you'll hear about it

I'll be interested to see you revisit your groupings in a year or so FT

D

OutofIdeas75

I "thank" a post when it reflects how I feel. It can be a great post, with awesome advice, but then a line might be added where I think it could have been left off. Like someone giving up crack but has the odd beer once a month...and a response is given that says, "Giving up crack is great, but you need to learn that the beer is the real problem!". Then...I just read on. It doesn't reflect how I feel. Even though I connected with 99% of it, the last portion I just couldn't endorse. So...that's how I "thank you" posts.

Tryin2Recover

well put, thanks melissa

CrackQuack

I wish I could double thank your post Dee.. LOL. I know that I do basically the same thing. In certain threads I hit the TY button because I agree or I like it and others, like Henhouse, I do it to show where I left off in reading. LOLOLOL

FT

I thought it was about time to resurrect my "Good Old Boys" thread that I started almost a year ago.

I think I have now graduated to GROUP NUMBER ONE.

However, I have failed the "Mutual Admiration Society" part.

Crap.

FT

TheReader

FT - I remember this post from last year. Good to revisit our old posts once in awhile and this was a good one. You have been a great kindred spirit!
Keep up the good work and posting. We all love hearing from you.

IvanKatz

FT, I'd say that 99% of the folks here on SR are pretty good folks... But, we all know that we can't escape the 1% of Aszh0les. It part of the human experience...

JustAYak

I was on a forum where they had a "groan" button installed and when you clicked it, it would say "The following user says No Thank You to your post." It became an issue because people would use it to gang up on other members, which is essentially how the thank you button could be used I guess, it's just not a "nicer" way to put it. Needless to say, the button disappeared soon after it's appearance!

Interesting thread though. I don't remember seeing it way back in March...

JustAYak

My computer is screwy and it keeps double posting... ignore

Dee74

It's the site Jason.

I guess I asked for a yearly update lol - but I'm kinda disappointed you still see things the same way FT.

Every year I'm here I see less of the divisions and more of the commonalities - but different strokes I guess.

as long as we're all on the same side right?
D

tgif

I use the TY button kind of the same as i use the Like button on Facebook. Just to say i agree or sometimes Thank you for saying what i would have said.