melissa4now

I really don't have any experience with drugs so some of this may sound really stupid but I'm hoping to get some help here. My boyfriend is a recovering drug addict. When we first met, I knew that he smoked weed but I knew of nothing else. Now I know that he also did cocaine back then. We lost contact and 10 years went by.

We met up again and he told me of his past drug use. He told me that he was addicted to opiates for most of those 10 years. He was in rehab a couple times but it took him going to prison for 8 months to get him off. After getting out, he had a morphine patch one time, which was his favorite, and that scared him enough to not do it again. He also told me that after he got out, he used meth a couple of times but he was off of drugs altogether.

Time goes by and after talking to his mom, I was convinced that he was still using drugs, probably meth because there were at least some signs that he had been making it back when we first got together. We talked about it and he disclosed even more to me. He said that he'd been using meth when we first got together but stopped because he realized that he didn't want to lose me the same way that his opiate addiction caused him to lose everything in his life. I believed him and stayed with him but told him that it would take a lot for me to trust him.

He stopped leaving the house for several hours all the time. He broke off all contact with quite a few friends that he had. There were no more constant phone calls, him leaving suddenly, or being gone a long time for small errands. But I never stopped worrying that he's still using.

Every once in awhile, he'll come home with this very weird smell on him. This is probably the one sign that causes me to worry because I don't know what the smell is therefore, I assume it's some kind of drug. It's a very weird smell to describe but the first thing that comes to mind is flat soda and a strong aluminum smell. Most of the time if I smell it, it's on his clothes and breath. He can just walk into the room and I can smell it. It stays on his breath for hours. I've asked him about it and he says that he doesn't know what it is.

I know nothing about drugs, how they are made, used, what they smell like, or what kinds of effects they have on a person so I don't know if I'm just so worried that I try to find his drug use when there is none or if he really is using. Most times, i believe that he's not using. He doesn't really have much of a chance. But there are those occasional times when he may. His behavior isn't drastically different although I do notice some changes at times (but i don't know if that's me being paranoid and worrying when I shouldn't be).

If any one has any advice or thoughts, I'd appreciate it.

Dee74

Hi melissa

I'm not much good at detective work I'm afraid...but if you have doubts, I'm guessing you have good reason for them....

We have a Family and Friends forum here you may want to check out as well:


Friends and Family of Substance Abusers - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

D

melissa4now

Thank you. My reasons for the doubts are his initial drug use that he hid from me. I worry that I won't see it again or believe the lies again.

Thank you for the link. I wasn't sure where to post this. I'm going over to check it out.

FT

Hi there. I don't have your answer and I really have no clue. I don't know what is available in your area, but a number of years ago when I found a funny smelling pipe that I wanted to know the contents of, there was a drug hotline in my area that offered to test it anonymously. I detest the idea of spying, but if you are trying to protect yourself, that may be an option for you if you have something with residue on it that can be detected. If not that, some of these hotlines have people on there with street knowledge who will talk to you anonymously as well. Many towns have a general crisis line number that will direct you sort of anywhere.

melissa4now

Thank you! I don't have anything that would have anything testable on it. After I suspected and questioned him about drugs (and revealed more usage to me) I did go through his car a few times (with his permission) but never found anything. I guess I'm trying to trust him for what he says but at the same time I'm afraid that I'll overlook a clear sign. If I knew what the smell was then I'd feel better. Maybe I'm just looking for something that will let me know that I'm not a complete idiot.

AprilSam

You say he smells like aluminum? Not sure what you mean. Ammonia? The best way i can describe it is 'chemically'. Like burning plastic? Some people say cat pee? Its hard to describe. Really shouldn't smell much if its pure, but since it usually isn't, smells vary. Meth users act like they've had way to much caffeine. This'll probably make your bf mad, but you could ask him to take a drug test?

Impurrfect

(((AprilSam))) - I would think if he smells "chemical", especially on his breath, he's still using. Though I normally don't recommend a drug test, I would probably get one that tests for opiates and meth, and the next time he comes home smelling like that, tell him you want him to take the test - his reaction should reveal a lot.

I also agree with ((Dee)) - the F&F/substance abuse is a wealth of knowledge, and the "stickies" - the posts at the very top, have a lot of good information.

When I was out, smoking crack, I had friends that did meth and they're very unpredictable...violence is a possibility. My stepbrother got really paranoid, when he was using it. He was convinced that people had cameras in our house and were watching every thing we did.

I would, in the meantime, keep a close eye on finances, and things that could be sold for drugs. Is money missing that he can't account for?

You'll have to make the decision on whether you want to stay in this relationship. Trust is a really big issue for me, and if I have doubts, am concerned that someone is using, I choose not to be around them.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy