lilbitofaith

Please help me. Ive been taking tramadol 50mg tabs for over 3 years now. Ive tried numerous times to get off of them but havent been able to. Im in the process of tappering off but that isnt working either. Ive been in and out of rehabs throughout my life but for different things. One was for an eating disorder and one was for hydrocodone abuse. Got through those but then relapsed. I have very horrible migraines and ibuprofin doesnt cut it. I dont get my scripts from a Dr. here I actually get them online. Its prolly illegal. But I can get a bottle of 180 pills for $100 and go through them in 6 days. I used to be able to take 15 a day and stop but now im in the 30's per day. Ive also had seizures from taking this medication. It sayes that it may cause seizures if you overdose and with my tolerance Im sure Im well over the overdose stage. This month Ive already had 2 seizures. My parents know of my problem and they took my car keys until I get off of these. Even that as an incentive hasnt helped me get off of them. Im 32 years old, have a great job and a great condo which I share with a woman I work with. I have so much to lose. So why doesnt that scare me enought to quit? The withdrawel symptoms are horrible! If I know Im running out of pills or wont have any to take the next day I call in to work because the symptoms are intolerable and I cant function. I have no energy any more and all I think about is these pills. God forbid I go somewhere and not have any in my purse. Someone out there give me some hope. Please. Im desparate. I cant go into a rehab or I will lose my job. Im taking a week off in March in hopes to quit cold turkey and stay with my folks and hope to get through the withdrawels and get back to work fully functionable. Any suggestions? I appreciate any responses.

Thanks,

Still Hopeful

NeedMyLife

Lilbit,

If you can take the week in March to get through the withdrawals, can you go to a doctor now to seek help tapering down until then? It wouldn't be rehab. Also, it sounds like you need to see a doc about the migraines anyway (like a Neurologist). There are medications to prevent and treat migraines and I don't think Tramadol is one of them.

You are in for a journey indeed and in the right place here for support.

doggonecarl

Can you really afford to wait until March? What if you OD in the meantime...your job won't seem so important then. If your performance drops off, they may fire you. So why not level with them and seek medical help. Most companies have to support an employee's rehab and can't fire you. But they can fire you for missing work and not meeting expectations.

You asked for help. We can only do so much. You have to help yourself. Don't let your addiction call the shots.

findmyway706

Hi Lilbit,

I am going thru the same thing. I feel for you. I am only up to 15 per day but no matter what amount if you aren't taking it as prescribed and for reasons to get "high" it is an addiction. I strongly don't urge doing this could turkey only because you have had seizures. I think maybe tapering and then slowy going down from 3 to 2 to 1 per day is the key. It will be hard, I am in the process of it now. If you need someone to email or talk to, I am here. I had to stay home today because of the withdrawl even though I am tapering. You will have withdrawls still believe me, but they are not as bad as if you went cold turkey. I have real pain that needs to be treated with meds as well, there are many other options out there...talk with your doctor to discuss them. I am also 32 and have the same life ...great job, great house, etc. I have a lot to loose over this. Let that be your trigger into getting sober....what you have to loose. I posted here under "2nd time trying to get of meds", if you want to read that.

We are here for you...I am here for you. You can do this!

lilbitofaith

Thank you so much guys. Im greatful I came across this site and decided to share my story and get advice from people who are going through this or have been through it. My parents and family just dont understand. They tell me to just stop taking the pills and why am I addicted. I have been to a neurologist and was put on anti-seizure meds (dilanten) for my migraines and for my seizures. He didnt know of my current addiction. Ive been to a counselor to help me tapper and he told me to keep a daily log of how many pills I was taking. Well that lasted for about 3wks then I was back up. I know I cant afford to miss work or get fired. My insurance sucks and wont pay for addiction help and I dont have that kind of money. Im hoping the seizure meds Im on will keep me from having anymore as I try to wing myself off of them. Any advice on how to tapper-a technique perhaps? findmyway706 thanks for offering to email. Id like that. I need all the support I can get. Are we allowed to share emails on here? Really new at all this. Anyways, thank you everyone for sharing yer responses!

litlbitofaith

stellintx

I too am in a position where I can't go for inpatient treatment. My addiction was at about the same level as yours. My withdrawal wasn't as bad as I had anticipated, but I won't say that the mental addiction is any ball game. That has been the real problem for me. My brain talking to me telling me that I need more and thinking of ways to go and get it. I have also been irritable and twitchy, but not too bad. Some of what I have read on here sounds horrible as far as the bodily addiction goes. However, my brain is working overtime. I am about 3 days sober and trust me it is telling me to use and to get more. I just want my brain to shut the F*&^ up!!! If that would happen, I could handle this. I keep trying to distract myself, part of that is why I am on here because while I am at work there really isnt much else I can do. So, I am trying and really really want this to work. ((HUGS)) I know what you are going through and I want you to make it too!

lilbitofaith

stellintx, thank you! (HUGZ back). Im glad you have made it for 3 days sober. Dont give up. You've gotten that far. How are you dealing with the withdrawels? Are you having any other than the mind working on ya? When I tried to get off of them its like I was almost dying. A little extreme but I couldnt do anything. I felt so bad I could barely get up to go to the bathroom. I have hot and cold sweats, go to bathroom all day long, cant sleep at all, tremors/shakes and headaches. Its aweful. If I could go through withdrawel and still work it wouldnt be so bad, but I cant even function. Otherwise I wouldve gone cold turkey a long time ago. How did you stop taking them 3 days ago?

lilbitofaith

has anyone ever tried hypnosis for addiction or acupunture? Ive heard that both of these can help some.

doggonecarl

Ah yes, the addictive voice. Every addict has to overcome this in order to recovery. There is a lot of information about the addictive voice (AV). Understanding it was THE major breakthrough in my recovery.

Basically, the part of your brain that is wired for survival has been chemically altered by the drug you are addicted to. Now that part of your brain, the base brain, is reacting as if you need the drug to survive. That voice is the addiction talking. It is cunning. It doesn't care for you or your health. It only cares for the drug. You can fight the cravings; you can dispute the addictive voice that begs you to use. Recognize the little monster at work. You are smarter and more powerful than your base brain.

I'll pray for you all to find the strength to beat this.

findmyway706

let me apologize if you aren't supposed to post email address on here, I am not sure of the rules...will read them now!

lilbitofaith

thanks, findmyway. i know the addictive voice! it tells me all the time that just a couple more pills wont hurt. yer buzz is going down so take some more. i hate that voice. im letting it control my every move. i have no will power right now. i need to get it back!

CrackQuack

Welcome to SR. You're going to find all the support you need here. You just have to utilize it and want recovery more than anything. It make take a few tries or you may get it right straight away. Everyone is different on that and if you don't get it the first time, keep coming back. Don't beat yourself up. Pick yourself up dust yourself off. Take a lesson from any mistakes and be grateful to be able to live and learn from them.
Crack was my drug of choice. I take tramadol and vicodins for pain management. I have prior back and shoulder injuries. I don't take them often, just when the pain flares up. Tramadols don't do anything except give me a killer migraine if I don't eat something first. I've never gotten a buzz off of them. I guess I can feel grateful for that. I had no idea they could even be addictive. I actually prefer them to the vicodin because the vicodin makes me feel funny and the tramadol did not.
Anyway, I wish you the very best of luck and thank you for educating me on tramadols. I assumed they were safer since they were synthetic. But then sometimes my addict voice will trick me and tell me there are things out there to feel safe around and reality is that nearly anything can trigger addiction. Ugh.

glitter

You are playing with fire! You have basically lied by ommision to a neurologist and that neurologist has formulated a treatment plan for you based on a lie.

If you NOTHING else, at least TELL the neurologist who gave you Dilantin that you are taking tramadol.

Best of luck to you.

lilbitofaith

I thought tramadol was a non-narcotic. I even went online and did research on it. All these sites stated that it was non-narcotic and non-addictive. LOL so not true. After becoming addicted and after telling my parents my mother did some of her own research and found that a lot of people suffer from tramadol addiction and that its very addictive. How can these companies portray drugs to be safe when they're not? I mean it should state that they are highly addictive and to only take as directed. But since Ive had this addictive disease I believed they were safe for me to take. It was cheaper than going to a neurologist and having tests done for my migraines so I took the easy route. So not the right choice!! I couldnt believe how quickly I became addicted. It was almost like overnight. Ive been addicted to cocaine and lortabs in the past and these, to me, are far more addictive. I didnt take the lortabs enough to have withdrawels from them. I was able to control my intake on those and not go overboard with them. The cocaine I did for about 2 years almost everyday. I spent tons of money on that stuff I pretty much came off that cold turkey and had no withdrawel symptoms. Weird huh? I wish these pills didnt give me such bad withdrawel symptoms! They are horrible. I would have quit along time ago had they not been so bad. Ive tried quitting several times and havent been strong enough to stop. I know I need to make my mind up that Im gonna get off of them and not give up!

artsoul

hey lilbit - I have severe migranes, too, and there are lots of wonderful drugs out there to treat them like Zomig and Imitrex. Has your doctor ever had you try any of these? I occassionally still run into doctors who prescribe pain meds and other kinds of meds, and wonder why, since the new drugs work so well with none of the side affects or addictive qualities.

Hang in there.....:ghug3

UAreMySunShine

Hi LilBit!
I was also addicted to Tramadol. I know how hard this stuff is to get off of. I went cold turkey but I absolutely do NOT reccomend it!!! I would think that you MUST talk to your doctor about a SAFE taper/detox plan. I personally never had a seizure while taking Tramadol, so I really have no experience on that subject...BUT, if you are already having seziures while still using Tramadol...WOW...that is very scary!! I have heard of some people having seizures while de-toxing from Tramadol though...
Anyway, I guess my point is that you MUST do this under a doctors care. I would even go so far as to say that it should be in-patient.
Have you tried to find doctors or clinics specializing in addiction that will work with you on a sliding pay scale according to how much money you make? I only know what kind of services we have here in Georgia, but do some research online and search state state or county provided addiction resources.
Keeping your self ALIVE is way more important than keeping your JOB!!!
You CAN do this...YOU are worth it!!
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. If there is anything you want to ask or talk about send me a private message.

Dee74

Hi lilbit.
Welcome to SR.

Great advice here - think about your priorities - can you afford not to seek medical help? Can you afford to wait til March for rehab?

Just look through the many threads here from people stuck on Tramadol/Ultram.

Be honest and open with your Dr - they can't help you if they only know half the story.

Please don't post email addresses or other personal info - this is an open forum...it has to be so people can find us....but it means everything we post here is accessible through search engines....and it's open to spam bots who'll harvest any email addresses they come across and add you to the mailing list....

We have a Private Messaging system here that works great.

D

lilbitofaith

thank you all for yer support and for opening up to me about your situations as well. to artsoul-i have tried Imitrex before and found that im allergic to it. i havent tried any other drugs that arent narcotic. i actually dont have a Dr. right now. im wanting to find a good neurologist though. i went to one several mnths ago but he was a total *******. he showed up 1/2 hour late then he stepped out as soon as he got there for another 20 mins. i brought my mom just incase i left anything out and he snapped at me when my mom had to speak up about something i forgot to mention. his name is robert saul. if any of you live in roanoke, va and need a nuerologist dont go to him! to youaremysunshine-ive been on these pills for 3 years now. my first seizure was about 6mnths after i first started taken the trams. i didnt put 2 and 2 together at that time. i have had about 5 more seizures since. one time i had 2 in one week. yes it is very very scary but i cant stop taking them. i do need to get on a regimen to tapper off. i dont want to go cold turkey cause i know the withdrawels will be aweful. when you quit cold turkey how long did you have the withdrawels for? could you go to work after a few days? so glad to meet people who understand what im going through. i told my folks about this past summer cause im tired of being on these things. they dont understand at all. they are very conservative religious people who tend to judge people so they really dont get it. they've never had a problem with addiction before. its hard to explain what you are going through with anyone unless they've been through it! i do feel better now that im able to talk to you guys and open up about all this. i felt alone and that there was no way out of this. i truly thank all of you for giving me hope

samaly

hi there.am having same problem with tremadol for around 10 years.am 32 years old so i spend a lot of my life taking it and got used to,cant and wont do anything without it.but there is hope.u can get rid of this problem by going rehab.NO OTHER WAY.time factor is the most important and rehab will give u that.i used ti gi d tox 4 a week thinking i will stop by myself,never happened and will not.u will just increase ur craving . i went more than 5 times d tox and dint work till i got desperate in my life so went to rehab and it worked.i now have control over it.even if i ielapse i have power and strnght to stop.not something VERY HARD like before.about ur job,i also did have same problem.i tried all what i can to convince them that i had a back problem that must need rest in bed for at least a month.i even got all documents from a friend doctor to prove it but rehab takes some time.i left my work to join rehab.its the only way.now i c things different and i applied for other jobs and was accepted in a good even a better one.even if u loose ur job and dont find another on after rehab,still do it.get ur life back and then manage change ur piorities.bottom line,i was like u very desperate ahd hopeless,living in hell until joind rehab.trust me its the only way to get urself out of hell ur living it.NO OTHER WAR,and a week is nothing and u cant stop by urself after u get it out of ur system.TIME FACTOR is very important,ataying away from drug plus knowing exactly ur disease and how to fight it.do it and get out of the hell that i knew and lived in b4 even if it makes u leave ur work.hope u listen to what i say cuz again,its only way out of thisA

samaly

hi there.am having same problem with tremadol for around 10 years.am 32 years old so i spend a lot of my life taking it and got used to,cant and wont do anything without it.but there is hope.u can get rid of this problem by going rehab.NO OTHER WAY.time factor is the most important and rehab will give u that.i used ti gi d tox 4 a week thinking i will stop by myself,never happened and will not.u will just increase ur craving . i went more than 5 times d tox and dint work till i got desperate in my life so went to rehab and it worked.i now have control over it.even if i ielapse i have power and strnght to stop.not something VERY HARD like before.about ur job,i also did have same problem.i tried all what i can to convince them that i had a back problem that must need rest in bed for at least a month.i even got all documents from a friend doctor to prove it but rehab takes some time.i left my work to join rehab.its the only way.now i c things different and i applied for other jobs and was accepted in a good even a better one.even if u loose ur job and dont find another on after rehab,still do it.get ur life back and then manage change ur piorities.bottom line,i was like u very desperate ahd hopeless,living in hell until joind rehab.trust me its the only way to get urself out of hell ur living it.NO OTHER WAR,and a week is nothing and u cant stop by urself after u get it out of ur system.TIME FACTOR is very important,ataying away from drug plus knowing exactly ur disease and how to fight it.do it and get out of the hell that i knew and lived in b4 even if it makes u leave ur work.hope u listen to what i say cuz again,its only way out of thisA