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Serenity... NOW!

Old 01-04-2011, 10:00 AM
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Serenity... NOW!

I just got done writing in a letter, what I want to say to AH tonight; how I am going to express my concern. I don't know if it's the proper way to handle this, but I am worried about if he's abusing pills. For a week or so that he would've been out of the Lorazepam, he had insomnia. I find out he got the pills refilled a couple days ago, higher dosage and more pills and for the past 2 nights he's slept like a log. I ask him a question last night re: who he was talking to the night before on the phone and he could not remember and just blew it off. After being in bed for about 2 1/2 hours, I awake to the sound of urinating.... in the bed. It's AH, wetting the bed, finally realizing he's wetting the bed and finally gets out of bed. His eyes, yesterday at the gym and last night at home looked sleepy and distant. I want so badly to count his pills, but I know that is my old behavior that I have to break out of! I hate this so much! He quit drinking a year and a half ago and now I'm freaking out about pills. Maybe it's nothing, maybe it's something.
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Old 01-04-2011, 10:22 AM
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One thing I'm pretty convinced of....enough pain and discomfort will motivate the user to address their problem. The bad news is, it usually has to be their own pain and discomfort, not yours.

You, on the other hand, have something in common with the user. When you get sick of living in the squalor and insanity [pain and discomfort], you, too can take action to end or change it. When you've had enough is entirely up to you. Some are tougher than others, but on this note, be aware there isn't any medals of merit ceremonies or acknowledgements for sleeping in beds others have urinated in. There is even less evidence that situations like this get better by themselves. On the contrary. They often seem to get worse. You can of course wait for the user to make the decision to change. I'm not betting on this, as I mentioned earlier, they often are motivated by pain....their own, not yours.

You can see a bit of a cycle here. It can be broken. You can break it. It's not easy, you may have to own your part in all this.

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Become involved in that link. They have ways of helping end the insanity. While it is obvious to all what the source of the insanity is, it remains a mystery why another would stay tied to it. Why they would allow their very lives to be ruined by this insanity. The mystery is solved in that link. Best to you.

Or you can continue to live in an environment that includes a person operating in a stupor, and finding no absurdity in urinating in a bed he shares with his wife.
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