Paulos

I'm worthless, a fat, ******** 25 year old who lives off his mother and is going through opiate withdrawal who has no passion for things like he used to, it's so sad.

It's a sad time for a man when he realizes his worth is ... nothing.

meditation

It doesn't have to be this way Paulos. Everyone has some worth. And the things you aren't happy about can be changed. Getting off substances, getting into a healthy eating habit, exercise, possibly finding something fulfilling that brings in some finances that give you independence. Take steps to get to a better place. I am working on the healthy lifestyle for myself. I've got to lose weight, I've got to stop smoking. My future will be brighter if I start doing these things. At the least I'll feel physically better, and any rise in self esteem is good because a little bit of feeling good leads to actions that help that increase self esteem. It rises as it increases. It's in your power to do this.

tsmba

Try thinking a bit about cause and effect. Opiate withdrawal makes one miserable...period. Nothing lasts forever, unless you choose to let it. If you sit and wallow in despair, you'll be depressed (duhhhh....). Everyone has poured on suggestions, what have you tried?

Zencat

Withdraw will mess with anyone's emotions, maybe that's just the case for you. Its always a good practice to think about your good qualities, we all have them, it just when one is feeling down their hard to remember. Keeping up with your recovery is a good quality you have .

Justfor1

Opiete withdrawal is very painful. I'm not sure how much dope you were on but it usually only lasts a few days.

Paulos

I wasn't ...... on DOPE >:|, I was on Darvocet/Darvon the opiate for 4 years because I was PRESCRIBED IT, and then the FDA took it off the market due to it giving people irregular heart rhythms. Cripes... I hate myself.

meditation

Dope is narcotics. Narcotics can be supplied by prescription. Paulos, I want to support you seriously. I know for myself I had to be able to get out of the mindset that I wasn't an addict, that I was addicted, that my drug my doctor gave me was causing some serious manageability issues in my life. I had to first admit I had a problem. Secondly sitting around talking about being worthless is not conducive to getting help. For once I had to get off my butt and do something constructive about my problem. I had to Woman up as they say to being a responsible person not relying on a substance to make my day better, ease my pain or numb my hurts. I hope you can get to a point that you can see that getting help and taking steps to get better is the way. I can yack all day about why it hurts or is hard but it won't help me a bit, it keeps me stuck.

Kyomi

I was prescribed my opiates for 3 separate chronic pain conditions. It didn't mean I couldn't get addicted because I did... Why didn't your doctor give you a replacement? There are other opiate medications out there that can be used... That is if you aren't addicted. Just because it is prescribed doesn't mean you can't be addicted....

mrsfray

I did read they took it off the market. Hang in there, it gets better!

Justfor1

Hit some NA meetings to stay off dope.

Paulos

I wasn't on DOPE >:O, justfor1, jeez... I was prescribed it for my pain.

Justfor1

I don't see the difference in taking heroin or abusing prescription narcotics. i know that "prescribed narcotics" sounds a whole lot better. When I was abusing vicodin and norco I got pretty much the same feeling as heroin. I felt better about myself though because I was getting it from my friendly family doctor rather than getting it from the seedy drug dealer.

meditation

Well I'm done here. Denial is such a part of addiction. If you want help we're here to support you, I don't want to argue with someone that isn't ready to be recovered. Sometimes it takes a couple of go rounds with substance abuse. If you have pain and want to be on narcotics that's between you and your doctor, I know I still have pain and it's either I have pain or I have to deal with active addiction. I don't have the time or the energy to argue with people about the issues.

FormerSoldier

Meditation, you are so correct! Paulos, if you don't admit to a problem, you're always going to be in denial. I'm not calling you a drug abuser, addict, doper, pothead, etc... What I am saying is that opiates (even when used properly and according to the doctors prescription) become addictive. Meaning your body becomes physically dependent on such medication. I don't consider myself an addict, as I was prescribed my medication by the same doctor for years, took it every 12 hours like I was supposed to, never once ran out before scheduled, and never took it to get that HIGH feeling some people take it to experience. I have been on oxycodone from 2003/2004 timeframe to 16 days ago. My body became physically dependent on the narcotic. I live with chronic pain each and every day! I have had 2 spinal surgeries, one being a complete fusion with removal of discs from L4-s1. The second was for an implantation of a spinal cord stimulator. I have chronic low back pain, and I stuggle every day, but I was fooled into thinking that permanently being on a narcotic was going to give me the pain relief I needed. I felt like crap while taking the medication, yes I got fat, still am! I admitted to myself and those around me that I had a problem, and that problem was that I was dependent upon the medication. It gave me mood swings, bloatedness, took every drop of energy out of me. It's been 16 whole days since I took my last oxycontin. My withdrawal is all but gone now. I feel so, so much better about myself both physically and mentally. It was the best decision in my life to kick the devil in the butt and stop cold turkey.

I was on top of the world when I got injured! I made my SFC/E-7 in a little under 10 years while on active duty. To put it simply, I had 2 more ranks to go to max out on the enlisted side of the house and I was only 27. I was destined for great things. I was in the best physical shape of my life. I was a paratrooper, a member of the Presidential Salute Battery in the Army's Honor Guard at Ft. Myer, VA (only one of 52 in the whole Army). My wife was so proud of me that she felt uncomfortable standing next to me at a ceremony in dress blues. She said that I was on her pedestle, little did she know that she was and still is on mine. I lost it all! My career was cut short at 14 years, 27 days! I picked myself up, dusted my boots off, and got back in the fight for life! I reinjured the back 2.5 years later (2008), lost my house, 2 cars, and barely survived, but I kept fighting. I have less pain in my back now than I did when I was on oxycontin. I am slowly getting "MY" life back, one day and step at a time. If I can make it through all the BS I have had to endure, then trust me friend, you can too!! Life is what we make of it, not what it makes of us. I'll leave you with this: when I had my first back surgery in 2004 my son was 9 years old. He made 2 things in school for me that I still treasure to this day. They were:

1. A picture of a lemon with a note written on it saying, "Dad, when life hands you lemons, make lemonade!" Attached was a packet of lemonade Koolade mix.

2. A drawing with the words, "The person I admire most is- My Dad" and he went on to explain the trials and tribulations I went through when I was injured and hurting.

When we suffer, we don't suffer alone! Make some lemonade, dude, and kick this in the butt.