pinkfirefly

I am 35 weeks pregnant, and I am so depressed lately. have so much stuff going on in my life, feels so over whelming. I have a 14 month old daughter and a husband to take care of. I don't know what to do with myself lately. I just almost don't want to do this anymore, don't want to be here anymore. I know its horrible to say and I have so much to be thankful for. but i really hate myself, and every day i'm so sad. I don't know how I get through the day. and I have no means of escape. I stopped drinking, which used to be my escape. I'm thinking of the baby inside of me now. what do I do to feel better. life is so miserable. I am on an anti depressant, and some anxiety medication. it helps a little I think. but not enough I guess. I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like a horrible wife and horrible mother. I need to pull myself out of this hole, before something bad happens. I don't trust myself sometimes. I do some horrible things and make bad mistakes with out thinking when I'm severely depressed. any one feel the same way in life right now?

Seren

I'm so sorry that you are experiencing depression right now. I've been there before. Sometimes things do seem overwhelming.

It must be a busy time taking care of a 14 month old and preparing for the birth of another.....I must admit that I am envious of all the joy you have in your life, and it's sad that you can't see it right now. But in spite of the fact that you can't see it, it is there for you anytime you want to experience it!!!! Of course your deserve it, we all do!!!!!

A counselor told me once to not make any major decisions or do things like climb up ladders while depressed.....just to be safe. Please know that life does have a lot to offer. Huge hugs to you and your whole family!!!! Take good care of yourself and that precious life you carry!!!!

Hugs, HG

Bamboozle

Please get to the doctor ASAP.

Isaiah

Hey pinkfirefly,

Sorry your depression is taking you out of your self.

Sometimes a therapist told me a lot and I think it's true: feelings are not always facts. You might feel like you're a bad mother, but that doesn't make you so. A sort of exaggerated example is people with phobias. If someone has a fear of cats they might feel terror around them, but does that makes cats harmful? Depression might be more common and more subtle, but it's much the same, it's our emotions giving us messages that aren't true.

For me a counselor/therapist was most helpful; perhaps your doctor can recommend you to someone, maybe even one experienced in working with pre-natal/post-partum issues. From what I've heard depression during pregnancy is not uncommon.

I'm sure with some help you can work out some of these fears and anxieties.

Fluttering

Please se your doc and let them know how yur are feeling...be honest..
With health care so specialized it is important to note that a prenatal doc may not be the answer...you may need one that specializes in depression and anxiety as well as alcoholism

glitterfairy

Great to hear you've conquered drinking during your pregnancy. I'm so sorry about the rut you are in. I too had pretty bad depression pre/post term pregnancy. My OBGYN gave me a book and stack of papers that seemed funny at the time but really helped.
Things like; When was the last time you showered? Did you eat today? Did you brush your teeth.
Although this seemed silly, I wasn't doing these things. As I started taking better care of myself I started to feel better.
Another thing, DO NOT isolate. Call a family member, or a girlfriend and open up! I was surprised how many other people fought depression.
You can get through this. Let your husband know you need help. If you need one day a week to get away do it.
I'm always here if you ever want to talk.
You won't be pregnant forever even though right now it may seem that way.