coffeeclub

should anyone hate themselves for telling someone else their feelings. My wife got mad at me for the exact same thing she does. I get pretty upset, and I don't handle things well. I kind of told her that if she did not quit I would get a divorce. We are both under a lot of stress. I bet she is under more stress. I just can not handle stress. When I brought up the divorce I was sincere, I was not joking. This happened a couple of times. I have moved out in the past. I asked my wife if she could handle living in the home without me. She said that she picked that home with me and if it were just her she would have picked a different home. It is too late for us to back out now. She says that she's sometimes scared to let out her feelings because I will just say that I want a divorce. There is truth to that, but I do not use it as a weapon. I just go by how I feel at any given moment. Assuming things settle down I will fall back in love and will think we will live happily ever after.

I'm so emotional and I hate myself for it. I'm bipolar and it shows. I'm on medication. I'm sincerely embarrassed of myself. I make my wife's live harder than it needs to be and I make my own life harder than it needs to be. I sincerely have no confidence in myself. About every 3 months I get really depressed and moody. I would like to be able to talk to my wife more about my feelings but she does not like to hear me be so depressed.

Should I hate myself for what I said. Heck should I hate myself for being who I am.

suki44883

Perhaps a trip to your doctor to check your medication dosage is in order. Often, after a while, they need to be tweeked a bit. Could be a big help.

Zencat

I know for myself that when I'm under a great deal of stress I will say thing things that I will latter regret saying. I've had hard times trying to resolve problems when I'm having some of the same problems I'm trying to resolve. During those times I need outside help like counseling or something else like that.

Live

I am bipolar also. I am responsible for managing my illness in ways that do not damage myself or other people.
I see a counselor weekly, my Dr monthly.
I write (furiously! ) in a notebook when I am irked.
Do not feel shamed by your feelings....but I remember hearing at a 12 step meeting "just because you feel or think something doesn't make it real." LOL
Being bipolar this is particularly appropriate to me!
I need to step back, take my time and reality check my thoughts and feelings.
If my anger is justified I am responsible for speaking about it kindly but firmly.
If I am very sad, I rest and need to report it to my counselor and Dr.
Reading and educating myself about my illness eases alot as I learn better what things are a result of my illness and what are not.
Marriage is never easy and is more difficult with mental illness.
I have found the book "The Love Dare" most helpful.
It is a Christian based book, but regardless of religious belief, I find it an incredibly strenghtening book.
best wishes to both of you.

wow1323

NO! Don't hate yourself. Your mind is a glourious thing. Writing is good and so is communication. I am not a Dr. but you should go talk to a counsler and maybe eventually bring your wife with you. Don't beat yourself up.