The Greatest Birthday Gift
Attitude of Gratitude
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
The Greatest Birthday Gift
Today is my birthday. I've not been looking forward to this day at all. Not because I have a phobia of turning a certain age, I don't have any problem admitting I'm 46 today . . . to be quite honest, I shouldn't be alive today due to the abuse I put my body through all those years I used so many drugs that looking back, I more or less tempted the Grim Reaper to come and take me. Put me out of my misery.
All my life I have always done everything in my power to make my friends and family members birthdays as happy as possible. I'm the person who calls their favorite radio station to request a birthday wish be sent out at the time they are driving to work in the morning. I've been known to put up a happy birthday banner on the front door to someone's apt. or a few balloons at a co-workers desk before they come in for the day. I am also one of Hallmark's best customers, I send out so many cards.
I realize that I am not the norm, most people don't go to the extremes I do on someone's birthday. But I have to admit, for once, I wish someone would do for me what I have done for so many others. There, I said it.
I woke up this morning to my cat running across the bed like a bat out of hell. "Oh, lovely, couldn't he at least let me sleep today of all days?" But he did leave me a birthday present . . . in a nice little pile on the living room carpet. To be honest, I started to feel sorry for myself at this point. Here I am, waking up on another birthday . . . alone. My son's at work, he went in at 7:30 this morning.
Then my phone rang. It was my Mom, who was admitted into the hospital again on Thursday, calling to wish me a Happy Birthday. Most people wouldn't understand why this was so special to me. As many of you know, my Mom has had more than her fair share of medical problems since the end of Aug. last year. Her mental capacity has also deteoriated as well. . . . she has a hard time remembering what day it is. But she remembered today. And also in the conversation, she asked me if I could help her have the DNR order lifted. . . she has hope again.
After I hung up from talking to Mom, it hit me. I am so very Blessed on this birthday. I don't need balloons and banners . . I have been given life's greatest gifts and they are right under my nose.
Next month, I will celebrate 3 years in Recovery! My last birthday before I got clean and sober, I spent in detox. . . boy, was I ever on the pity pot that day! Here I was, in detox yet again, and I wondered why I didn't have family and friends calling to wish me a happy birthday, where was my cake? My son didn't sound very sincere when he finally found out from my Mom why I hadn't been answering my phone at home. None of the nurses were very pleasant when I told them it was my birthday. I can only shake my head in awe when I look back at this. . . that's how powerful this disease of addiction is. I had nearly destroyed my family on my downward spiral on what I'm sure looked like a death quest to them and I expected Happy Birthday wishes? Unbelievable.
Today, on this 46th Birthday of mine, I realize how Blessed I am. No, my son isn't here . . . he's at work. My son moved in with his Dad when he was 11 because he could no longer watch me slowly kill myself. Last year, right after he graduated from high school, he moved back in with me. He realized that I am in Recovery, not just abstaining from drugs and alcohol. Brandon being here is a miracle in itself. I was told I would never be able to get pregnant and here I have this wonderfully beautiful son who is 19 years old, a full time college student who started his dream job a little over a month ago. And he's living with me again. I believe his has forgiven me for all of the things I did while I was in my addiction. He is very much against drugs and alcohol so I feel as though the cycle has been broken in this family.
And my pooping, spaz cat? I got him about 7 or 8 weeks into my Recovery. Brandon had not yet moved back in with me so I was living alone and as we all know, being lonley isn't a good thing in Recovery. When I was walking out the door with him that day, I asked the woman I got him from if she remembered what day he was born and when she answered me, I knew I made the right decision in getting him. He was born on my Sobriety Date. . . so we have grown together.
And by far, the greatest gift I have ever been given is my Sobriety and a second chance at life. If I listed everything that Recovery has brought into my life, I would still be pounding on these keys at midnight. Through my Recovery, I have been Blessed with this site and all of the wonderful friends I have made on here. It's comforting to know that no matter what time, day or night, if I need to talk, laugh, cry, share on the joys of Recovery or just need some friendship from people who understand . . . you are all here for me. And for that, I thank you all.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and for sharing not only my birthday with me, but also everyday on this wonderful journey called life.
God Bless,
Judy
All my life I have always done everything in my power to make my friends and family members birthdays as happy as possible. I'm the person who calls their favorite radio station to request a birthday wish be sent out at the time they are driving to work in the morning. I've been known to put up a happy birthday banner on the front door to someone's apt. or a few balloons at a co-workers desk before they come in for the day. I am also one of Hallmark's best customers, I send out so many cards.
I realize that I am not the norm, most people don't go to the extremes I do on someone's birthday. But I have to admit, for once, I wish someone would do for me what I have done for so many others. There, I said it.
I woke up this morning to my cat running across the bed like a bat out of hell. "Oh, lovely, couldn't he at least let me sleep today of all days?" But he did leave me a birthday present . . . in a nice little pile on the living room carpet. To be honest, I started to feel sorry for myself at this point. Here I am, waking up on another birthday . . . alone. My son's at work, he went in at 7:30 this morning.
Then my phone rang. It was my Mom, who was admitted into the hospital again on Thursday, calling to wish me a Happy Birthday. Most people wouldn't understand why this was so special to me. As many of you know, my Mom has had more than her fair share of medical problems since the end of Aug. last year. Her mental capacity has also deteoriated as well. . . . she has a hard time remembering what day it is. But she remembered today. And also in the conversation, she asked me if I could help her have the DNR order lifted. . . she has hope again.
After I hung up from talking to Mom, it hit me. I am so very Blessed on this birthday. I don't need balloons and banners . . I have been given life's greatest gifts and they are right under my nose.
Next month, I will celebrate 3 years in Recovery! My last birthday before I got clean and sober, I spent in detox. . . boy, was I ever on the pity pot that day! Here I was, in detox yet again, and I wondered why I didn't have family and friends calling to wish me a happy birthday, where was my cake? My son didn't sound very sincere when he finally found out from my Mom why I hadn't been answering my phone at home. None of the nurses were very pleasant when I told them it was my birthday. I can only shake my head in awe when I look back at this. . . that's how powerful this disease of addiction is. I had nearly destroyed my family on my downward spiral on what I'm sure looked like a death quest to them and I expected Happy Birthday wishes? Unbelievable.
Today, on this 46th Birthday of mine, I realize how Blessed I am. No, my son isn't here . . . he's at work. My son moved in with his Dad when he was 11 because he could no longer watch me slowly kill myself. Last year, right after he graduated from high school, he moved back in with me. He realized that I am in Recovery, not just abstaining from drugs and alcohol. Brandon being here is a miracle in itself. I was told I would never be able to get pregnant and here I have this wonderfully beautiful son who is 19 years old, a full time college student who started his dream job a little over a month ago. And he's living with me again. I believe his has forgiven me for all of the things I did while I was in my addiction. He is very much against drugs and alcohol so I feel as though the cycle has been broken in this family.
And my pooping, spaz cat? I got him about 7 or 8 weeks into my Recovery. Brandon had not yet moved back in with me so I was living alone and as we all know, being lonley isn't a good thing in Recovery. When I was walking out the door with him that day, I asked the woman I got him from if she remembered what day he was born and when she answered me, I knew I made the right decision in getting him. He was born on my Sobriety Date. . . so we have grown together.
And by far, the greatest gift I have ever been given is my Sobriety and a second chance at life. If I listed everything that Recovery has brought into my life, I would still be pounding on these keys at midnight. Through my Recovery, I have been Blessed with this site and all of the wonderful friends I have made on here. It's comforting to know that no matter what time, day or night, if I need to talk, laugh, cry, share on the joys of Recovery or just need some friendship from people who understand . . . you are all here for me. And for that, I thank you all.
Thanks for taking the time to read this and for sharing not only my birthday with me, but also everyday on this wonderful journey called life.
God Bless,
Judy
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Wilmington, NC
Posts: 932
I can vouch that you are a Hallmark VIP cardholder. What's in your wallet? Ha, Ha.
Happy Birthday Sweet, Thoughtful, Always there, always full of encouragement, always with a smile Judy!!!
God bless you! You have come so far and I am just so very proud of you!!
I wish I could be there with a cake and a half naked man but alas, the miles are too great at these gas prices for that to happen at this moment in my life. It is coming though!!!
I hope you have a great day and know that alot of us here on SR, wish we could do more! I'm so glad you mom called. I prayed she would.
Much Love,
Janet
Happy Birthday Sweet, Thoughtful, Always there, always full of encouragement, always with a smile Judy!!!
God bless you! You have come so far and I am just so very proud of you!!
I wish I could be there with a cake and a half naked man but alas, the miles are too great at these gas prices for that to happen at this moment in my life. It is coming though!!!
I hope you have a great day and know that alot of us here on SR, wish we could do more! I'm so glad you mom called. I prayed she would.
Much Love,
Janet
3
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Judy)))
As always, you remind me of the simple blessings we have in recovery. I wouldn't wish addiction on my worst enemies, but I think that we appreciate things so much more because we remember where we were.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
As always, you remind me of the simple blessings we have in recovery. I wouldn't wish addiction on my worst enemies, but I think that we appreciate things so much more because we remember where we were.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
*Grateful*
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,619
Judy,
Great post. you were very transparent.
I could relate about the part w/ feeling let down on your birthday. My mom always made such a big deal on my birthday, no one will ever match her. So in a way, that was a let down.
Hope you have a wonderful year! blessings, Sheila
Great post. you were very transparent.
I could relate about the part w/ feeling let down on your birthday. My mom always made such a big deal on my birthday, no one will ever match her. So in a way, that was a let down.
Hope you have a wonderful year! blessings, Sheila
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: md
Posts: 3,042
Well, Happy Birthday to you....and remember, even sometimes seems as though it's just words on a computer screen, there is a real person behind these words. And real feelings of friendship and admiration for you! You're great!
kj
kj
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