Paulos

Hi all just checking in with my usual report and to see how you all are. Wanted to say congrats to all the people who have stayed sober too. As for me, well I've had my issues, down to 50mg of Lamictal.

Something that rings in my mind lately however... I'm almost 23 years old... not much accomplished, life is in like shambles... don't know much or enough to survive about the world... how will I ever be able to live happily with such insecurity? I can only pray the medication/booze getting off it will help me get myself back together!

sailorjohn

PAULOS

This has been bugging me for a while:

"Make a joke and I will sigh, and you will laugh, and I will cry. Happiness I can not feel, and love to me is so unreal."-Loony from Rings of Power


The lyric is Black Sabbath "Paranoid". I recognized it for the longest time but couldn't place it, looked it up.

Astro

Paulos, in AA the Promises tell us that "fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us" if we do the Steps and practice the Principles. I'm 44, and until I sobered up a few years ago I had no idea what I would accomplish in life. Now that I'm sober my journey is just beginning. God has a plan for me and I do my best to follow His will every day. I still don't know much and hope that I remain teachable for the rest of my life. Every day is an accomplishment, and my happiness is measured by the richness of my life.

And while there are still times when I feel a little insecure, I like to think that my humility keeps me peaceful and serene.

BUTTERFLY-7

Paulos Don't worry Buddy in this road all we need to
know is what are we Doing to get better then the
rest will be reveal it's good that you are sking
that means that you want to make it you still have dreams
don't let our present conditions define our future

just keep following instructions and trusting the Process
you'll be alright and even when you can fallow
the Yellow Brick Road,your going to make it to Kansas city

if you didn't understand what I said I was trying
to make you laugh I love that movie of the Wizard of UZ

what I'm trying to say is take your medication as prescribe
and see your doctor, and if your seen a psychiatry see
him too, and just be still, I know you don't want to make
meetings I could respect that, but to be Honest it
will make a world of Difference if you Gave it a chance
Isolation is our worst enemies, thats what the Disease
wants Paulos it wants to Isolate you the Disease of Addiction
I made my first meeting yesterday, and the fear and the
compulsiveness and obsession lift it off.

I feel like a Free Spirit, Butterflys are meant to Fly
and I'm Flying, you cloud too Paulos Give it a try
God Bless Buddy I'll be:praying

historyteach

Paulos has made it clear he's not interested in AA.

Paulos,
I'm 52 years old. I haven't accomplished much in my life either. I've got a degree and I teach history. I've got a son. I own my home -- along with the bank, that is, lol! And that's about it.

What is it you'd *like* to accomplish? What would your ideal world look like?
Lay it out for us. Tell us what it is you'd like to do. I know I'd love to hear about it.

Shalom!

Paulos

I guess I just want to be sure I'll survive in life, be able to enjoy the things I once did again, ... hm I wish I had never picked up a drink in the first place 3 years ago... but that's something I've accepted and am living one day at a time with... Day 10 btw all

suki44883

Day 10 of not drinking? That's WONDERFUL, Paulos!!! Congratulations!!! :bounce

historyteach

Keep it up!
You're right, Paulos; we can't change the past.
We can only determine that which is to come by the choices we make.
So, keep on making those good ones, Paulos!
Cuz, we're rooting for ya!

Shalom!

Rowan

I'm rooting for you, too, Paulos. Try to be aware of those automatic negative thoughts, and stop 'em in their tracks! I'll try to do the same!

Paulos

Hmm okay I'll try that Rowan, I just want them to go away... it's horrible stuff and makes me feel like I never had self confidence in my life. Yeah all I do is make good choices teach, but I keep worrying about the bad possible ones... thanks Suki I'm now on Day 11, and I won't mess up again... I know better, a lot better now.

Astro

Paulos, I wanted to know those same things just over 3 years ago. I'm still here, kickin' & screamin' & enjoying life to the fullest. Trust me, you'll survive and you'll probably enjoy those things even more. There are rooms full of people in recovery that prove it!

Paulos

Hm thanks Astro... at least I'm finally on the right PATH.

nandm

Paulos, How are you doing? Haven't heard in a few days.

Paulos

Struggling... the medication/alcohol withdrawal is tough.