My letter to my mother, which brought me healing....
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
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My letter to my mother, which brought me healing....
Dear Anxiety board,
I had a massive verbal fight with my mother yesterday, which caused me a great deal of pain & no doubt hurt her deeply as well....
I had one of those lightbulb revelations today, I made up my mind to send her some flowers tomorrow, with a letter from me to my mum.....
Here is a copy of the letter which I put prayerful thought into & it brought healing to me to while I was writing it & I pray that it mends her broken heart & heals both my mum & our relationship, as mother & son.....
I would appreciate your feedback on the letter, as I mean't every word of it, from deep within my heart....
Dear Mum,
I am writing you this letter as, as it is the only way, I can convey my feelings to you without saying things I don’t mean to say, or saying things that may be misinterpreted….
I do know that in many ways it is my own fault that I have let you get to me both recently & in the past & that I am too sensitive & take things too personally, but It is like I have been an open wound lately & I don't know how to deal with my feelings of unforgiveness toward myself & others, such as yourself....
I know that you aren’t totally at fault, & that despite your failings, I sincerely love you from the bottom of my heart & not with God’s love, but with the love that comes from deep within my own human heart…
I still am full of anger & feel a deep sadness well up inside me when I have a fight with you & I feel so sorry that I hurt you & get so down on myself with over-whelming feelings of guilt, shame & obligation afterwards.....
I sometimes find it hard to relate to you or communicate with you even though I am grateful to you for bringing me into this world & I know that I am the problem in our relationship, not you, but at present I don‘t know how to change….
I'm edgy & nervous after going off Zoloft, although Dr Lee is trying me on all different kinds of medications at present…..
I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel for both you & me….
Lovingly Yours,
Your Son Simon
I had a massive verbal fight with my mother yesterday, which caused me a great deal of pain & no doubt hurt her deeply as well....
I had one of those lightbulb revelations today, I made up my mind to send her some flowers tomorrow, with a letter from me to my mum.....
Here is a copy of the letter which I put prayerful thought into & it brought healing to me to while I was writing it & I pray that it mends her broken heart & heals both my mum & our relationship, as mother & son.....
I would appreciate your feedback on the letter, as I mean't every word of it, from deep within my heart....
Dear Mum,
I am writing you this letter as, as it is the only way, I can convey my feelings to you without saying things I don’t mean to say, or saying things that may be misinterpreted….
I do know that in many ways it is my own fault that I have let you get to me both recently & in the past & that I am too sensitive & take things too personally, but It is like I have been an open wound lately & I don't know how to deal with my feelings of unforgiveness toward myself & others, such as yourself....
I know that you aren’t totally at fault, & that despite your failings, I sincerely love you from the bottom of my heart & not with God’s love, but with the love that comes from deep within my own human heart…
I still am full of anger & feel a deep sadness well up inside me when I have a fight with you & I feel so sorry that I hurt you & get so down on myself with over-whelming feelings of guilt, shame & obligation afterwards.....
I sometimes find it hard to relate to you or communicate with you even though I am grateful to you for bringing me into this world & I know that I am the problem in our relationship, not you, but at present I don‘t know how to change….
I'm edgy & nervous after going off Zoloft, although Dr Lee is trying me on all different kinds of medications at present…..
I believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel for both you & me….
Lovingly Yours,
Your Son Simon
Last edited by Spacecat; 04-17-2007 at 04:48 AM. Reason: Spelling mistake...
Rinnie's Grandpa
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Pylesville Maryland
Posts: 1,273
Simon...
I think your letter to your Mother is heartfelt and I hope she accepts it and your kind words as such...
I lost my Mom in "98" and I miss and think about her everyday. I miss her so much...
I hope you and your Mom work things out. You will only have one Mother in this lifetime...
Best of luck to you two.
Steve
I think your letter to your Mother is heartfelt and I hope she accepts it and your kind words as such...
I lost my Mom in "98" and I miss and think about her everyday. I miss her so much...
I hope you and your Mom work things out. You will only have one Mother in this lifetime...
Best of luck to you two.
Steve
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
Posts: 116
Dear I'mready99,
God Bless you dear friend & I thankyou for sharing.......
It has made me even more thankful that my mum is still with me & I want to restore my relationship with her, before it is too late...
Thinking of you at this time....dear friend....
God Bless you dear friend & I thankyou for sharing.......
It has made me even more thankful that my mum is still with me & I want to restore my relationship with her, before it is too late...
Thinking of you at this time....dear friend....
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Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
Posts: 116
Dear Steve,
Thankyou, friend, I need all the prayer & support I can get after going off my anti-depressant med & I will add you to my prayers, my friend....
I am believing there will be healing in my relationship with my mother, but I believe it has to begin with me, as I believe that we can only have an affect on those around us, when we allow change to happen in our own lives....
I also believe that only as we yield to The Great Shepherd, can we find healing & wholeness, which in turn will cause us to change & become more like Jesus.....
Thankyou, friend, I need all the prayer & support I can get after going off my anti-depressant med & I will add you to my prayers, my friend....
I am believing there will be healing in my relationship with my mother, but I believe it has to begin with me, as I believe that we can only have an affect on those around us, when we allow change to happen in our own lives....
I also believe that only as we yield to The Great Shepherd, can we find healing & wholeness, which in turn will cause us to change & become more like Jesus.....
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: North Vancouver, British Columbia
Posts: 1,714
Hello Simon! I think it's a lovely letter. You have outlined your feelings very well and kept blame out of it. I hope your mom realizes that she has a very kind and loving son.
Looking forward to hearing how things go with your doctor today.
Take care!
Looking forward to hearing how things go with your doctor today.
Take care!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
Posts: 116
Dearest Margo,
I am in the public library today, because I have to kill some time in town until my appointment with my Psychiatrist, this afternoon & I am using the library P.C.s, so I'll keep my reply short & sweet.....
There isn't a lot of privacy in the library today, as it is very crowded, & my home town only has a small library....
Your feedback on the letter I wrote to my mum, was so affirming & encouraging, although I had a reasonable amount of confidence in the way I worded the letter, you have reinforced my belief that God will use this letter to bring healing to my mother & myself & our relationship, & perhaps, in time the lines of communication may be opened between us, as I constantly yield to The Potter's hand & allow Abba Father to grow me up into becoming a Man Of God & no longer a mere Youth, spiritually speaking....
I can't wait till my appointment with my Psychiatrist today, as there are so many questions I would like to ask him....
May God richly bless you, Margo....
I am in the public library today, because I have to kill some time in town until my appointment with my Psychiatrist, this afternoon & I am using the library P.C.s, so I'll keep my reply short & sweet.....
There isn't a lot of privacy in the library today, as it is very crowded, & my home town only has a small library....
Your feedback on the letter I wrote to my mum, was so affirming & encouraging, although I had a reasonable amount of confidence in the way I worded the letter, you have reinforced my belief that God will use this letter to bring healing to my mother & myself & our relationship, & perhaps, in time the lines of communication may be opened between us, as I constantly yield to The Potter's hand & allow Abba Father to grow me up into becoming a Man Of God & no longer a mere Youth, spiritually speaking....
I can't wait till my appointment with my Psychiatrist today, as there are so many questions I would like to ask him....
May God richly bless you, Margo....
Rinnie's Grandpa
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Pylesville Maryland
Posts: 1,273
Good morning Simon...
How did the visit to your Doctor go? Well I hope...
Have you had a chance to talk to your Mom since you sent your letter...
You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers friend.
Steve
How did the visit to your Doctor go? Well I hope...
Have you had a chance to talk to your Mom since you sent your letter...
You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers friend.
Steve
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
Posts: 116
Dear Steve,
I went to my Psychiatrist today & I asked him to try me on Xanax for a short period of time, although it is addictive, but I will try not to abuse this medication & he only gave me a prescription for a low dosage of 5mg tablets...
I am still trying to make up my mind as to whether I should try myself on Effexor XR, later on down the track....
I described all the symptoms I have been experiencing lately, to enable him to make a correct diagnosis of what sort of anxiety I actually suffer from...
I went to my regular Bible Study or cell group tonight, & my fellow Christian Brothers observed that I was showing manic symptoms throughout the evening, but I felt they could have been a little more supportive of my decision to cease taking my anti-depressant meds, & I simply thought I was just a little overwhelmed with joy, stemming from my enthusiasm for the things of God, although I was overly talkative & I started to get overly hypo in my speech as the night went on, & thought it was simply caused by my tiredness, as I had a big day today & not much sleep last night....
I'm getting a little too enthusiastic about what God is doing in my life, & I guess I have to be a bit more sensitive to the fact, that not everyone shares my views on the subject of learning to rejoice in hardships of all kinds & that not everyone is at the same stage in their Christian Walk....
I was disappointed with one of my Christian Brothers, who jokingly said I should go back on Zoloft, just so I would become more subdued in my enthusiasm & not so manic...
God Bless you Steve & I thankyou from the bottom of my heart for your prayers & supportive words.....
P.S. I am also praying for you, my dear friend...
I went to my Psychiatrist today & I asked him to try me on Xanax for a short period of time, although it is addictive, but I will try not to abuse this medication & he only gave me a prescription for a low dosage of 5mg tablets...
I am still trying to make up my mind as to whether I should try myself on Effexor XR, later on down the track....
I described all the symptoms I have been experiencing lately, to enable him to make a correct diagnosis of what sort of anxiety I actually suffer from...
I went to my regular Bible Study or cell group tonight, & my fellow Christian Brothers observed that I was showing manic symptoms throughout the evening, but I felt they could have been a little more supportive of my decision to cease taking my anti-depressant meds, & I simply thought I was just a little overwhelmed with joy, stemming from my enthusiasm for the things of God, although I was overly talkative & I started to get overly hypo in my speech as the night went on, & thought it was simply caused by my tiredness, as I had a big day today & not much sleep last night....
I'm getting a little too enthusiastic about what God is doing in my life, & I guess I have to be a bit more sensitive to the fact, that not everyone shares my views on the subject of learning to rejoice in hardships of all kinds & that not everyone is at the same stage in their Christian Walk....
I was disappointed with one of my Christian Brothers, who jokingly said I should go back on Zoloft, just so I would become more subdued in my enthusiasm & not so manic...
God Bless you Steve & I thankyou from the bottom of my heart for your prayers & supportive words.....
P.S. I am also praying for you, my dear friend...
Last edited by Spacecat; 04-18-2007 at 06:54 AM. Reason: Spelling Mistake
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2006
Location: N.S.W.
Posts: 116
Originally Posted by I'mready99 
Good morning Simon...
How did the visit to your Doctor go? Well I hope...
Have you had a chance to talk to your Mom since you sent your letter...
You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers friend.
Steve
How did the visit to your Doctor go? Well I hope...
Have you had a chance to talk to your Mom since you sent your letter...
You and your Mom are in my thoughts and prayers friend.
Steve
I haven't heard from my mother, yet, although I sent the flowers & the letter to her, yesterday aftenoon....
This may be due to the fact that she wasn't able to pay her phone bill recently & she can only receive incoming calls & can't make outgoing calls yet, but I believe she will get around to getting the phone company to restore her service soon...
God Bless you dear friend.....
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