AngelMagic7

My boyfriend for got to give me my antis for over a week and because of it, I've had pains in my head, arm's and loss of sleep again.
I didn't realise that I wasn't getting my med's because of the pain killers he was giving me so I thought some of those pills was my med's.
I've been crying on and off for the last 3 days, feeling dizzy and shouting a lot at him to the point that yesterday I nearly jumped out of the car.
Today I head butted a wall and punched it 3 times, Got so much anger and pain in me that over the passed few days I've felt so crazy
Danny feels really bad for forgetting. Can't wait to feel better again as I've done well not to Self/Harm but have been thinking about S/H and killing myself again and now no why.
He really has a bad memory problem, I've tried everything to help him but nothing works and it's really bugging me as he never remembers anything, sometimes to minutes after I say something he's forgotten. Any idea's please ?
xXx

nevergivingup

Is there any way that you can get a watch or something with an alarm? My cell phone has an alarm on it that I can set for several times in a day and they pop up with little reminder messages! Just a thought! Hope you start feeling better soon!

AngelMagic7

thanks xXx I should start using a dairy again this year too. haven't found 1 I like yet because I like small 1s I can cover Mmm . . . . I look for 1 today.

I am feeling better thank you honey but that's only because I cut my left arm to bits again on friday morning. It's been along time coming.

last week, I found out that my mum has been blaming me for stuff that only she could have done and I text my dad my new number only to get no reply that was over 2 weeks ago, so my mums been saying nasty's to him too.

My sister told my boyfriend that it's also my mums fault to why my dad doesn't even want to meet him.

My mum has been the cores of all the bad things in my life starting from when I was 4 years old. I remember everything she's done and yet she still wont stop and she knows how unstable I am. I hate her.

Loads of my family come along way to see us, all meet up at my mums and when I was there they didn't even talk to me and when I asked her about it she said she never said anything to them and that I was too sensitive.
I know she's lying because I know what she's like.

So all this as well as coping with life was just too much for my mind to cope with all at once, there for it went BANG again.

My arm was starting to look ok but I've done so much this time I'm going to have to cover it for months now.
I hate her, I hate her, I hate her. Ahhhh h h h h. . . . . Devil Bi**h

Sorry everyone,I just don't get people that just want to hurt you all the time.

xXx

hope3

Hi, maybe one of those pill holders with

Mon, Tues, Wed. on it fill it up weekly, and

that way you will know if you took them.

hugs hope3

ccgirl

Those pill organizers work great.


My husband gives me my meds because I suck at taking them; unfortunately partners are only human and forget too, so it's good to have a back up.

nevergivingup

Is there any way you can take a break from interacting with your mother? I've had similar problems with mine. Infact, she'll occassionally forget who she's speaking to, and say things directly to me. I'm pretty sure it's a reaction from the medicines she uses and the drugs she abuses. I kind of had to set boundaries to protect myself from her. And ultimately I had to make the decision to not speak to her for a period of time, and not speak to anyone who was willing to believe the nonsense that she was saying.

I'm sorry about your arm. I hope it heals soon. I actually haven't cut myself in a long time. I'm really proud of that!

Sending prayers for strength and harmony in your life!!!!

AngelMagic7

Thanks guys and yes my mums been the same with drugs too,
I love my boyfriend so we've found away of remembering.

My mum was acting up to days ago because her best friend came down to see everyone.

Mum making out how worried she was and cared but my boyfriend made a few statements of truth while she was there and her friend didn't seem happy with her.

My mum even give me hugs kisses and stroking my hair while she was there and I'm thinking f**k off you fake.
I moved away doesn't feel nice coming from her.

When I was really ill and had to live with her for 3month so I could be watched to stop killing myself, all she cared about was the food that we were eating even thou Danny and I went food shopping a few times and gave what money we had towards food.

I use to clean the house for her every day because she made me feel so unwelcome and I lost 1st in weight because I was worried about eating her precious food.

The times in the passed when I was attacked by men she didn't be leave me, thought I was attention seeking and in some way was all my fault.

Yeah because a 7 year old would rather be attacked instead of playing dolls with her friends And to top it all she tells me it's her fault that some mad women has been bulling me all my life and yet my mum wont tell me why.
This man women's even had men after me betting me up.
The police wont help I've tried again and again.
Makes me sick that this is all my mums doing.

I could go on and on but I think you've got a better picture.
Going to start reading a knew book today down on the beach, take my mind off the G.E.D . . . . . . . . . Genetic Egg Donor .

xXx Love Angel xXx