major anxiety attack

[BlueMoon]

RAH went out with a sober buddy yesterday to do a couple errands. an hour later his buddy was at the door to say he took RAH to the ER! He'd been sick all day with diverticulitis and was finally in such pain he couldn't take it.
So they admitted him, talked about and decided against surgery (whew) but he's gonna be there 4-6 days

I am agoraphobic and no way can I go to the hospital to see him - he understands but I feel really bad anyway.
I am really stressed out about it and stressed about having to take care of myself - selfish I KNOW - but my disease plus him spoiling me/feeding into it just has me totalled right now. On the other hand, HE is sounding much better

But *I* am a basket case - i can't stop shaking - the anxiety is non stop and i'm trying hard to NOT take extra meds ....................

[mxchaos]

Originally Posted by BlueMoon

RAH went out with a sober buddy yesterday to do a couple errands. an hour later his buddy was at the door to say he took RAH to the ER! He'd been sick all day with diverticulitis and was finally in such pain he couldn't take it.
So they admitted him, talked about and decided against surgery (whew) but he's gonna be there 4-6 days

I am agoraphobic and no way can I go to the hospital to see him - he understands but I feel really bad anyway.
I am really stressed out about it and stressed about having to take care of myself - selfish I KNOW - but my disease plus him spoiling me/feeding into it just has me totalled right now. On the other hand, HE is sounding much better

But *I* am a basket case - i can't stop shaking - the anxiety is non stop and i'm trying hard to NOT take extra meds ....................

So sorry about your friend but this my be a good thing in challenging your fear. I too was stuck at home for many years just like you but now I'm out working and living life again. I hope someday you will choose to challenge this disease and have a full life. It can happen. As far as taking extra meds maybe you should call your Dr and talk about how you feel.

speedy recovery to both of you

[BlueMoon]

i hurt so much
it's non stop
i do have an appt with a therapist tomorrow and that has me scared to death as well - getting there etc ...

[mxchaos]

do you have a cell phone? could your therapist talk you through coming in?

[BlueMoon]

nope - no cell phone

i'm going to call a cab and it'll only take a minute or 2 to get there
i THINK once i get there, it'll be ok

it's just the anticipation of waiting is doing me in