Realizing the Underlying problem

[hairgirl]

I am on the Substance Abuse board often, and am currently in treatment.I have started to realize how much my social anxiety has affected me throughout my life.I have spent the last two days home from work, I have such a horrible feeling when I am at my job, that they all talk about me, don't like me, it is so scary and consuming.Between my drug addiction and my anxiety disorder, I cannot seem to keep a job, I usually quit from the stress and depression.
I always thought that this was a direct result of my addiction, but am figuring out, it is not.I have been sober for almost nine months, and am still having this problem.I do take Cymbalta, and am in med assisted drug treatment.
A couple weeks ago, I suffered a miscarriage, and I think I may have pushed myself too hard to bounce back.I just have this huge fear of returning to work, I am so uncomfortable there.I have to force myself, and it is hell.I have a feeling I am on the verge of losing my current job, too many missed days.
I just don't know how to handle this right now.I made so much progress, yet feel I am now letting this take over.Any advice would be helpful.

[nandm]

Welcome to SR and our mental health forum.

I would suggest speaking with your doctor about your concerns. I don't know which came first the chicken or the egg but many people who are in recovery wind up realizing that they also have mental health issues as well. Is that because the mental heath issues were there all along or because the drug/alcohol abuse created the problem. Really doesn't matter because the problems are still real and need to be addressed. Good luck and hope to see you posting again with us.

[jfk45]

Originally Posted by hairgirl

I am on the Substance Abuse board often, and am currently in treatment.I have started to realize how much my social anxiety has affected me throughout my life.I have spent the last two days home from work, I have such a horrible feeling when I am at my job, that they all talk about me, don't like me, it is so scary and consuming.Between my drug addiction and my anxiety disorder, I cannot seem to keep a job, I usually quit from the stress and depression.
I always thought that this was a direct result of my addiction, but am figuring out, it is not.I have been sober for almost nine months, and am still having this problem.I do take Cymbalta, and am in med assisted drug treatment.
A couple weeks ago, I suffered a miscarriage, and I think I may have pushed myself too hard to bounce back.I just have this huge fear of returning to work, I am so uncomfortable there.I have to force myself, and it is hell.I have a feeling I am on the verge of losing my current job, too many missed days.
I just don't know how to handle this right now.I made so much progress, yet feel I am now letting this take over.Any advice would be helpful.

Keep in mind that people are just that, people. No more and no less than you. Even the bosses have personal problems. Boredom at work often leads to gossip and the more a person gossips, the more boring their home life is. I have caught myself gossiping a few times and I realize that it is almost always out of boredom or insecurity with myself.
I had that social anxiety disorder for a long time, I take zoloft, it has done amazing things for me in the social realm, I actually have started conversations with people I felt so inferior to before, guess what, they are pretty much the same as me.
When I don't want to do something that I must I say to myself "Just do the action and the feeling will come" going back to work will be scary at first , but just acting it out getting up and going will lead you back to where you were, and everytime it's a struggle keep saying that phrase over and over and keep taking those first steps and keep doing the first right thing, the feeling will follow.

[headstrong13]

I can understand what you're saying. It's hard to try & figure out when the panic attacks started and why they did. I've spent all too much time trying to figure this out too. For me some of it started when I was a child. Our home was broken into twice when I was in grade school, this caused me a deep fear of staying home alone.. To the point I would call someone to come over & stay with me because I would have insane panic attacks the entire time. Even now if I hear a loud noise and no one is home, I go into panic mode.

Other things have happened to me, to cause me to have these problems (social anx. & panic disorder). I don't wish it upon anyone seriously.

~LC