CarolD

The only sober time I am responsible for is......
my own.

If I decide to drink alcohol again....
I would re start my sober time.

Mongo

Carol!!!

Really glad you're back.


We missed you.

Ron

concolor1

It was a situation where I permit myself one (I've never been able to finish a second). I'm out for dinner late at night, usually Mexican, and while I love iced tea, a couple of them and I'll be up all night (I never drink coffee after four or five in the afternoon, either).

I would've finished it, but the frickin' restaurant served it almost warm . . . I managed to let go of the resentment, though, although I probably won't go back there . . .

I'll let you folks know when I have another one (no plans one way or another) . . . As Laurie6781 notes, this in an individual decision, and I've posted here that what's going on in the rest of one's life is more indicative of relapse (which is a process that doesn't end with the first drink; that's the end of the process, and by living a reasonable program and having taken dozens of responsible inventories over the years, I can tell when I'm on the beam and when I'm off it).

If you're hanging out in a bar a lot, JMHO, you're on shakey ground whether you're drinking coffee, coke, or plain tonic with a squeeze of lime. I actually spent a bit of time in two bars a couple of months ago on two different evenings; I don't remember how long it had been the last time I spent any time in one . . . I stuck to Virgin Marys, and there wasn't any "stinking thinking" or "trying to grasp some vicarious pleasure," but I was struck afterwards by how weird I felt. In both cases it was get-togethers with dear friends (one AA member was in one group; we had that extra closeness of course), and I had good reasons . . . I have no plans to go back there, either, and I'm hopeful the next time these friends are in town, the reunion will be at someone's home.

I've also got a bottle of vanilla in the cupboard that I'm not adverse to sprinkling a few drops in some warm milk--along with a tsp. of sugar--on a cold morning when I need to get back to sleep (I work shifts, and sleep is an important part of my recovery and mental health. When the weather's warm, I just have cold milk).

The pint bottle is about an eighth gone, and I promise if you check my cupboard next year at this time, more than half of it will be left . . .

The scotch I used to drink was 86 proof (43% alcohol), and a pint bottle usually wasn't enough for an evening . . .

Honest, for me, if I wanted to get drunk, I wouldn't bother with half measures . . . BTW, while I sometimes have booze in my house for visitors (none at the moment), I don't keep scotch around . . .

As my sponsor's sponsor (who drank an occasional near beer in the days before N/A's) used to say, "If you're going back out, I recommend cheap, fortified wine. That way you won't have to worry about going downhill."

That strikes me as the right idea . . . Maybe cheap sherry or Paul Masson white port . . . Genuine rotgut . . .

If you're new in sobriety, it's probably something you might want to avoid, particularly if beer was your beverage of choice, but for those of us old farts, listening to stuff like this from the podium just reminds us of how so many "bleeding deacons" need an "Authorities Anonymous" program . . .

lostmdboy

For me who's drink of choice was beer, I feel it would lead me back to drinking. In my mind the only ones that really worry if there is alcohol in things are alkies. During my many atempts at quitting drinking I would try drinking near beer, but then the stinking thinking would begin. I would tell my self that if I mixxed a couple real beers in it would be ok. I quess you can see what direction I wold head off to then. Any way I feel everyone is different, but for me I will stick to sweety tea.

nogard

Dancing with the devil is likely to get me burned.
".. total abstinence.."

I always worry when I see teh usual listy of reasons to drink/use coming up.

Kevin

CarolD

When did we change our AA recovery program to one of
almost
abstinence?

I missed the memo!

nogard

lol Carol

Debaucher

As someone who was undecided on this topic... let me give you and update...

I was drinking Kaliber and other NA beer on my weekly dart night (on a team)... everyone else was drinking real beer but my alcoholic friend on the team who was also drinking NA... My brother switched to NA as well (I think as a show of support for which I am grateful)...

After the season ended I had a 6 pack of st. pauli NA in my "beer fridge"... poor fridge has been so neglected over the last 3 months... ;-(

Well I went through a stretch where I was coveting real beer. I have since asked the wife to not purchase NA beer. It hasn't been in my house now in the last 2 weeks... and my craving of real beer is passing.

Are the 2 related... I'm not sure... It could be that I went to lunch with some coworkers at a brewery and they drank some amazing new brews... then a few days later went to dinner with my running club after a 4 mile run at another local brewery... again same situation...

I find I am able to deal with the immediate situation of tempation... but then afterwards it is followed by coveting and craving.

Perhaps I am seeing the light... perhaps I am only see the reality of MY situation. I cannot tell another alcoholic right from wrong in THIS situation but I feel I need to share this.

I still firmly believe that NA beer is not in itself harmful to the alcoholic as long as he/she is honest with themselves about their intentions... and in this case I think my intentions were good MOST of the time but a few times I think I used it as a substitute for the real thing... BAD...

Honestly I see this as a lesser temption... on par with going to bars... the big book says you can go if you have a good reason...

For me... I am going to look at it the same way... and I can't think of a "GOOD REASON" for me to drink NA beer anymore... I like it ok... but not enough to endure the cravings again and again... my whole life...

Pick-a-name

haha.....except that none of us would drink it, either! (Why would we need to when only one glass of the "real stuff" is plenty for most of us!)

My son and I have talked about this before and I believe he is correct when he says that "non-alcoholic beer" is only something an alcoholic would come up with and/or drink. The only people I have ever known who bought it,drank it were alcoholics (ok;maybe a young kid inamoured with the idea of drinking alcohol would,too) who were trying to moderate their drinking or "prove" to themselves and/or others that they "didn't have a drinking problem,they just liked the taste". Always was short-lived. It was a hope to cut back drinking without stopping.

Kinda like me drinking decaf coffee in the morning (and that actually tastes better although not quite as good)....might taste the same but I'm not "satisfied" because it is missing what I am craving. JMHO

St_Kurt

LOL! I didn't see this before, but I've said on many occasions that if they ever figure out a way to make a high quality (tasting like Stoli or Ketel One or better) non-alcoholic vodka, I will be the first in line to buy some.

I happen to really like the taste of straight vodka and since nothing non-alcoholic even approximates the taste, I really miss it.



~SK~

ThomCat

Good morning all- the question is O'Doul's. OK, I am 2 years sober after many hard highballs chased down with beer; you know the story, same as yours. I always thought of myself as a social drinker. And I was; only people stopped laughing at my jokes and started shaking their heads! A Catastrophic event... and I stopped. Celebrate Recovery, 12 steps. Enough said.

My mind has never been clearer and I will not go back to that dungeon call "Drunk". Have a friend I asked about "O'Doul's". He said, "I was sober for 17 years before I could drink one of those. You're not ready for that." But the trouble I had was the social aspect of gatherings with alcohol flowing. I felt lonely and by myself with everyone else having a good time. O'Doul's or other safe drinks (I like sparking water, or a ginger ale, with a dash of bitters) allows me to be social and still drive home. I'm a pretty stubborn guy.

Sober is my new Drunk!(Paul Carr)

Db1105

A dead rattlesnake can still bite you I value my life to much to join the alcoholic research team. I can't drink alcohol safely. I don't drink near beer, virgin concoctions, or cook with alcohol.. That's just me.

Isaiah

Feel like this topic pops up every week...

I guess I'm a bit alone on this one. I do drink it on rare occassions. I don't buy it for home; if I want something fancy I'll get some really good root beer or ginger beer. When I'm out at a restaurant or a bar (also a rare occassion) I might order it (5% of the time or less would be my guess.) I've got no illusions that it might somehow bestow an effect that alcoholic beer did. For me it's a soft drink, barley soda. If I didn't find Coke/Sprite/etc. kind of gross it'd be a non-issue.

For whatever reason my alcoholic brain doesn't make any connections, it doesn't make me nostalgic or trigger an urge for alcohol. If it did, I wouldn't touch it. The trace alcohol also doesn't concern me. If it's too small to have any noticeable effects I don't consider it a slip; else I might have to question whether eating sushi is too (soy sauce = alcohol.)

Just my subjective opinions though. I wouldn't argue my feelings against anyone who feels differently. If n/a beer is still beer to you, then I'd highly advise not touching it.

And there is non-alcoholic vodka. Evian makes a great version.

ThomCat

Maybe I am not an "alcoholic" in the strictest sense of the word. I had no withdrawal, no shakes. Good days and bad days - highs and lows. No matter, I am a person that used alcohol to numb my painful memories. And it took its toll! But the more productive way is to deal with the pain or the causes of it rather than try to bury them or medicate the pain away. The promise I was given by one of my accountability partners was that when I learned to live sober I would be more productive, think more clearly, and the longer I was without booze the better life would be. Scared the #@^& out of me!

mick3580

I am an alcoholic by the description offered in the textbook "alcoholics anonymous: the story of how many thousands of men and women have recovered from alcoholism." Therefore, I believe that I am bodily allergic. I am not allergic to getting drink. I'm not allergic to a physical craving that I can feel; I'm allergic to any alcohol whatsoever. If I did not fit aa's description of alcoholism, then I would drink NA beer. However, I'm an alcoholic according to a particular description of alcoholism. Therefore, I cannot drink any at all; I stay away from mouth wash and foods with trace amounts of alcohol. The only reason I do this is because of the TYPE of alcoholism I have.

Dee74

I'm probably repeating myself in this thread but here goes

I don't drink NA beer because it looked like beer, felt like a can of beer, it smelt like beer, it had that same condensation thing on the can like a beer, the same fizz and foam when you pop the can, tasted like beer (kinda)....

Then I'd wonder why I'd go out everytime and get 'real' beer.

I was still knee deep in old behaviours, and didn't even realise it.

As a former beer drinker I know it ticks all the boxes for me, and opens the door to old behaviour and old thought patterns.

maybe ask yourself why would you choose NA beer when there's so many other things to drink, though?

ask yourself why you need an amber fluid to 'be social' ThomCat.

If you being social is somehow connected to your drinking (and NA beer is drinking without the alcohol) then you're making a big rod for your back.

You can learn to be social without a crutch.

I look at the whole NA beer thing like tethering a dog...he can run around a little but he can still only run in circles.

why not get rid of the tether altogether?

D

Hope4Life

After reading through this entire thread I would like to clarify 1 important fact...
NA Beer is NOT alcohol free and it DOES NOT have .05% alcohol, it has .5%.

Yeah, so what, right? After being sober for a while you CAN catch a buzz on 8 or 10 O'Douls or St. Pauli Girl N/As or Clausthaulers. Remember why we drank?

DEE has said it best, it ticks off all the boxes of drinking a REAL beer and can lead to a relapse in many people.

WHY RISK IT!

sarstan

I don't mind near beer. There are some good kinds- grolsch, beck's and a generic brand they sell near me. I've heard about some better eastern european brands, but I haven't gone out of my way to find them. I like it because it makes me wonder why I would bother with alcoholic drinks. I mostly drink alone and my nights in with near beer are the same as my nights in with alcohol except I am sober and I wake up feeling great (and proud). Also, on a hot summer day when I think that a real beer would taste great, I have an option.
I don't know that near beer is good for everyone, but for me, it works. If they'd only make good tasting non-alcoholic chardonnay...

legna

I always thought that drinking non-alcoholic beer was sort of like going to a strip club.

You get a taste of what you're not going to have - and getting what you want is probably going to kill you or your penis.

Ipanema

I suppose some people would be able to drink the near bear but it's not, to me, worth the possibility of waking up the addiction. I believe what others tell me in meetings that if I start to drink again I will go back to where I left off. The end of my drinking caused me to hope I wouldn't wake up tomorrow. That's a place I never want to go to ever again. I can handle being around family who drink but in very limited amounts. Today I am excited when I wake up for the new day to begin, living sober. It's not all roses and butterflies but with the tools and people in AA I am so proud to be a Recovering Alcoholic. I have learned that I can only control myself and help others if they desire the help.