|
dishonesty lies and selfishness where do the dishonesty lies and selfishness come from? are they part of the charactor that becomes corrupted or are they flaws made magnified by alcohol? i had to leave my A, again, because of the dishonesty, lies, and selfishness. i told him i love him. i told him that his quitting drinking just magnified the other addictions. where do they come from? i am trying so hard to understand. |
Do you think maybe they come from fear and denial? My boyfriend and I used together and cleaned up together. The first time we quit, he started using again behind my back. I was so broken-hearted because he had lied to me. I thought that I could never forgive, instead I started using again too. Now that I look back, I realize the reason he was dishonest with me was because 1) he was afraid I would be mad & not forgive him and 2) because he wanted to protect me and keep me from using again. We both quit again on the 1st of December, and now I realize that even though I did forgive, I haven't forgetten. I am suspicious of him all the time now, and am worried that he is using behind my back =( The thing is, I really don't think that he is (honestly), but no matter how hard I try, I can't get it out of my mind. I don't think that this really answers the question you asked, but I understand the feelings that caused you to ask it. It is so hard when you love someone more than anything, but yet you can't or don't trust them. Nearly drives you insane. |
Selfishness spawns dishonesty. Addicts are self absorbed people who resort to dishonesty as a survival technique. I will lie cheat and manipulate to get what I want then I will lie cheat and manipulate some more to avoid taking responsibility for my actions. We learn what we live.If a child lives with fear he may resort to dishonest to avoid rejection or punishment.Checking our family history can sometimes reveal important clues as to where our behaviour comes from. |
Originally Posted by quietsins where do the dishonesty lies and selfishness come from? are they part of the charactor that becomes corrupted or are they flaws made magnified by alcohol? i had to leave my A, again, because of the dishonesty, lies, and selfishness. i told him i love him. i told him that his quitting drinking just magnified the other addictions. where do they come from? i am trying so hard to understand. He loves booze/drugs more than anything. Wouldn't you lie to protect that which you love? Your kids? Your partner? Your booze? Your drugs? |
| All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:46 PM. |