Lost my job
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 103
Lost my job
Been through a very hard few weeks with cutting down. Gone from a lot of units to not-such-a-lot, to help with withdrawal so I can eventually safely stop for good.
I'd been in close contact with manager about what was happening and he was supporting me, but once the company who owns the company i work for, found out, they decided i'm too much of a risk. Never been drunk at work, never been driving drunk.
Just thought I'd get that out there. Going to be hard to stay on target now that the world has shown me how much it wants me to fail. Maybe I should just go the way I'm going. I'll ultimately fail anyway. Why fight the flow of life...
I'd been in close contact with manager about what was happening and he was supporting me, but once the company who owns the company i work for, found out, they decided i'm too much of a risk. Never been drunk at work, never been driving drunk.
Just thought I'd get that out there. Going to be hard to stay on target now that the world has shown me how much it wants me to fail. Maybe I should just go the way I'm going. I'll ultimately fail anyway. Why fight the flow of life...
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
That's your AV talking. Don't listen to it. Do you want your life to get better or not? If so, then it's still worth getting sober. There will be new opportunities for you. Who knows why this happened?! No one. One thing I suppose, you have time and space to focus on your recovery now.
Please dont use this as an excuse to go back out there. It's one thing to be unemployed, but unemployed and an active alcoholic isn't going to get you too far.
Please dont use this as an excuse to go back out there. It's one thing to be unemployed, but unemployed and an active alcoholic isn't going to get you too far.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 103
What is an AV? Of course I want life to get better, and it was going in that direction... until this afternoon. I'm really trying to stick to my target but with all the thoughts stress anxiety depression etc it's a 'kin mountain to climb to keep on top 
I have applied for jobs but I just can't believe I've lost my job through actively doing something about my drinking for the past few weeks. Man.
I have applied for jobs but I just can't believe I've lost my job through actively doing something about my drinking for the past few weeks. Man.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
its a bump in the road and if you keep drinking it will just make your situation worse as you can add drinking to your list of troubles. You can't relaly control your employment status. all you only do what you can with a situation like that. But you can get the drinking under control.
When i've been out of work I always do whatever to try and imporve myself somehow even if all i do is read a book. It helps combat the depression of the situation etc..
I also try and think about things like hey wow i dont have to go into work tommorrow oh awesome i'm my own boss now. haha no more having to listen to the boss nag me about this and that. I'm free i can wake up and do what i want rahter then waking up going Oh crap how will i pay the bills i'm a failure screw me FML etc... It migth sound insane to have the positive thoughts that i describe above but hey when you dont have much to cling to you cling to whatever you can I say.
Hang in there.
When i've been out of work I always do whatever to try and imporve myself somehow even if all i do is read a book. It helps combat the depression of the situation etc..
I also try and think about things like hey wow i dont have to go into work tommorrow oh awesome i'm my own boss now. haha no more having to listen to the boss nag me about this and that. I'm free i can wake up and do what i want rahter then waking up going Oh crap how will i pay the bills i'm a failure screw me FML etc... It migth sound insane to have the positive thoughts that i describe above but hey when you dont have much to cling to you cling to whatever you can I say.
Hang in there.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
" Going to be hard to stay on target now that the world has shown me how much it wants me to fail. Maybe I should just go the way I'm going. I'll ultimately fail anyway. Why fight the flow of life..."
no, its not going to be any harder than before and no, the world doesn't want you to fail and youll only fail if you allow it- its your responsibility to stop drinking and not the responsibility of the world to allow it.
ive been fired from some very lucrative jobs. after being a sober a bit I couldn't blame any one of them for firing me. i truly was risk. working hungover and often still drunk from the night before, i was a risk.
it was when i put myself in their shoes that i changed my perception.
berrybean typed what i was thinkin:
Please dont use this as an excuse to go back out there. It's one thing to be unemployed, but unemployed and an active alcoholic isn't going to get you too far.
no, its not going to be any harder than before and no, the world doesn't want you to fail and youll only fail if you allow it- its your responsibility to stop drinking and not the responsibility of the world to allow it.
ive been fired from some very lucrative jobs. after being a sober a bit I couldn't blame any one of them for firing me. i truly was risk. working hungover and often still drunk from the night before, i was a risk.
it was when i put myself in their shoes that i changed my perception.
berrybean typed what i was thinkin:
Please dont use this as an excuse to go back out there. It's one thing to be unemployed, but unemployed and an active alcoholic isn't going to get you too far.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by jimmyc 
What is an AV? Of course I want life to get better, and it was going in that direction... until this afternoon. I'm really trying to stick to my target but with all the thoughts stress anxiety depression etc it's a 'kin mountain to climb to keep on top I have applied for jobs but I just can't believe I've lost my job through actively doing something about my drinking for the past few weeks. Man.
I have applied for jobs but I just can't believe I've lost my job through actively doing something about my drinking for the past few weeks. Man.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
keep in mind too booze is a depressent. at a time like this do you wanna do something that could and probably is going to make you even more depressed? you gotta up your odds at happiness one way to do that is to not drink its a good starting point anyhow.
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: NC
Posts: 662
How about looking at the situation as a direct consequence of your long term drinking problem instead of looking at it as "See when I try to stop things go to hell so why even bother?". If you had gotten sober earlier, you would still have your job, it is not getting sober that is causing the consequences, it is the prior drinking that is.
Don't let this make you give up. You still have the rest of your life to fight for. Sure, it is horrible to lose a job, but now use that as motivation to not drink since you do not want to lose your next job due to drinking do you?
you can do it!
Don't let this make you give up. You still have the rest of your life to fight for. Sure, it is horrible to lose a job, but now use that as motivation to not drink since you do not want to lose your next job due to drinking do you?
you can do it!
You're not shackled to not drinking, you're free from drinking
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 1,406
Sorry to see you've lost your job. That's a blow to your self esteem. But there isn't a darn thing you can do about the job lose. You can, however, do something for yourself. And that's to quit the drinking and make your life better. I can guarantee that drinking will only make it worse. You can do this!
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
If that is the type of company it is, you deserve better. Reach for more...while sober. Later on, when you have an even BETTER job, and are rocking the sober life, they will be sorry they missed out on you as an asset!
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Join Date: May 2016
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 177
I so know exactly where you are at. I was fired and my employer didn't even try to hide the fact that it was because I came clean about being an alcoholic and expressing a need for help. (Same thing - never drunk at work - no criminal record etc.)
It really affected me in alot of ways. I trusted that if I got honest things would only get better - not worse.
But looking back on it 8 years later... while I still hold a small grudge (just because it's pure injustice and misunderstanding and ignorance) it's gotten alot better - and there is no way in H** I would want to be working for a pompous a** like that anyways.
OK maybe more than a small grudge I'm holding.
Hmm. This reply is causing me to look at myself.
Anyways - been there. It's not fair. But you know what won't make it better? Drinking. I know we have to learn from our own mistakes but I used that firing as a job to go on a bender and almost cost me my life.
You're better than that. Try to redirect the self defeating thought patterns because it really is just your disease trying to pull you down further. You can do this.
It really affected me in alot of ways. I trusted that if I got honest things would only get better - not worse.
But looking back on it 8 years later... while I still hold a small grudge (just because it's pure injustice and misunderstanding and ignorance) it's gotten alot better - and there is no way in H** I would want to be working for a pompous a** like that anyways.
OK maybe more than a small grudge I'm holding.
Hmm. This reply is causing me to look at myself.
Anyways - been there. It's not fair. But you know what won't make it better? Drinking. I know we have to learn from our own mistakes but I used that firing as a job to go on a bender and almost cost me my life.
You're better than that. Try to redirect the self defeating thought patterns because it really is just your disease trying to pull you down further. You can do this.
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
I'm sorry Jimmy.. Best move going forward is no drinking at all you have done excellent cutting down but at the same time it is still in your life and will not help you at all it will do the opposite in fact... accepting my alcoholism saved my life I don't shout it from the rooftops but I know in my heart I'm addicted to alcohol normal drinking isn't possible for me & I'm ok with that Jimmy you know why ?
Because I am no longer a slave to alcohol letting it rule & destroy my very being I share it here because i know each member reading this feels the same or there around and they get it if I walk into a recovery meeting I don't have to say a word they know why I'm there
I'm really sorry you lost your job esp since you wasn't drunk at work or drove drunk that's bad management & hopefully you find better employment but at the same time now is a excellent time to work on you it is so worth it bad days and good eventually building sober muscles and being ok with you knowing you are enough brother
Wishing you the best stick with us
Because I am no longer a slave to alcohol letting it rule & destroy my very being I share it here because i know each member reading this feels the same or there around and they get it if I walk into a recovery meeting I don't have to say a word they know why I'm there
I'm really sorry you lost your job esp since you wasn't drunk at work or drove drunk that's bad management & hopefully you find better employment but at the same time now is a excellent time to work on you it is so worth it bad days and good eventually building sober muscles and being ok with you knowing you are enough brother
Wishing you the best stick with us
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 3,195
I've lost many jobs over the last 10 years. My alcoholism was the main cause in every case. Each time after getting fired, I would go on a massive bender, sober up, start applying for jobs again. The thing is, I didn't do anything about the drinking, so I was always one drink away from getting fired again. These days, one drink leads to a week long bender and I don't let things like a job get in the way.
I'm not working now, but I am working the steps in AA. I can't keep a job until I achieve complete sobriety.
I'm not working now, but I am working the steps in AA. I can't keep a job until I achieve complete sobriety.
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 103
Thanks everyone for your replies and support. Too many to reply to individually, but I see everyone says about cutting out completely. I don't want to be nieve or a hipicrite or anything but, does anyone really understand how an individual's withdrawal is? I've been to the doctor many times and it's really at that point now where it is dangerous for me to cut it out completely. This is the reason I'm cutting down. One unit a day or two, or three so that I don't feel those terrible withdrawal symptoms. It's 100x worse than quitting smoking and i've tried that many times and all.
Someone said about holding a grudge... I don't hold a grudge with the company I was employed by, but I do with the company that my old company are owned by. They had the final say. My company were supporting me, time off, leniency with being on time etc, but as soon as the owner found word, they were very fast to kick me out. They wouldn't even hear my side of things. To them it's just "oh **** alcohol, van, power tools, get him out he'll get us in trouble". I don't hold anything against my company. I appreciated their support and made sure they knew that when the final handshake took place at the train station.
I have a lot of time on my hands now, and in a week or so, I might just throw my card and cash out and make damn sure that I don't drink. I will get my family set up so that they can support me, but I will make damn sure I don't drink a drop. I feel that once I can sort of cope with quitting completely from, say, 10 units a day, I might have a realistic shot at this. However alcohol is a problem in itself. Where do I even start with the depression and social anxiety (that never went anywhere even when i was sober for a month in november)? How do you juggle these three massive problems at once, whilst trying to maintain even just an IMAGE of a "normal" life.
Thanks guys, I know i don't post much on here and I do feel selfish about posting and getting replies, and not reciprocating others, but at the moment, I'm very close to the edge. The sledge hammer life has swung into my spine today is really too much for me to deal with. I am alone, in my room, watching football, drinking to my target.
Welp this turned into a stream of consciousness. Sorry chaps, but thanks chaps. I really appreciate your replies. I will try to make an effort in supporting others soon, but for now, vulnerable and small is not the word.
Someone said about holding a grudge... I don't hold a grudge with the company I was employed by, but I do with the company that my old company are owned by. They had the final say. My company were supporting me, time off, leniency with being on time etc, but as soon as the owner found word, they were very fast to kick me out. They wouldn't even hear my side of things. To them it's just "oh **** alcohol, van, power tools, get him out he'll get us in trouble". I don't hold anything against my company. I appreciated their support and made sure they knew that when the final handshake took place at the train station.
I have a lot of time on my hands now, and in a week or so, I might just throw my card and cash out and make damn sure that I don't drink. I will get my family set up so that they can support me, but I will make damn sure I don't drink a drop. I feel that once I can sort of cope with quitting completely from, say, 10 units a day, I might have a realistic shot at this. However alcohol is a problem in itself. Where do I even start with the depression and social anxiety (that never went anywhere even when i was sober for a month in november)? How do you juggle these three massive problems at once, whilst trying to maintain even just an IMAGE of a "normal" life.
Thanks guys, I know i don't post much on here and I do feel selfish about posting and getting replies, and not reciprocating others, but at the moment, I'm very close to the edge. The sledge hammer life has swung into my spine today is really too much for me to deal with. I am alone, in my room, watching football, drinking to my target.
Welp this turned into a stream of consciousness. Sorry chaps, but thanks chaps. I really appreciate your replies. I will try to make an effort in supporting others soon, but for now, vulnerable and small is not the word.
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,183
You can stop safely right now, this instant, if you want to. See a doctor, there are medications to help, nothing will make it truly easy but you can make it less awful and reasonably safe. "Eventually" never seems to come when we find logical-sounding reasons to drink yet another day. 
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Join Date: Jun 2016
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Jeff I tried benzo's and they were no good at all. Eventually really is a thing to me. If i was just going to sit and destroy my life completely and just sit and drink, I would have, but for the past few weeks my intake has come down to about half what it used to be. Now is that progress? Given the doctors advice about the dangers of cold turkey, and how they know the meds didn't help, cutting down is the only other way, and I really have put 110% into it. I wouldn't be at half my original intake otherwise. My "reason" to drink is to save my life (ironic) as what the doctors say isn't the best news to me in the world and I will not go against their advice again (like i have many times before)... cold turkey you risk serious repercussions and drugs don't help, cut down is the only other option. Thanks again for your reply.
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 36
I'm sorry you lost you job - but if you continue to work on your sobriety the only way is up! Nothing worth having in life comes easy - that includes sobriety. Life can be cruel but you need to look for the positives and not use hard times as a justification to wallow and drink. Alcohol only makes problems a MILLION times worse and drags you further and further away from resolving the issue that caused you to drink in the first place. Not to mention the depressant effect quashing any glimmer of optimism.
I hope you find another job soon. But be kind to yourself - maybe use this break in employment as an opportunity to heal, reflect and focus on recovery.
I hope you find another job soon. But be kind to yourself - maybe use this break in employment as an opportunity to heal, reflect and focus on recovery.
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 103
Maz I intend to use this time effectively in my "recovery". Find the positives? Well, I guess not being at work tomorrow (or for the foreseeable future) means I can cheer England on in the euros tomorrow as I'll have a TV infront of me? Another positive? Well I guess I've never really opened up to people before, especially management(!), about my problem, and that was a big step. That's about all I find right now. Thanks again Maz.
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