dwtbd

Realized today in a very concrete way one of the big pluses of having quit drinking. At the end of my drinking career anxiety was a daily companion and could in some instances manifest in such a way as to affect my behavior by balking on certain responsibilities or even removing myself from certain situations or activities.
Today was a big test and recognition of a positive change. I had my first MRI and it was a lot less comfortable than I imagined. While normally not claustrophobic things are rather close on the table. The tech gives you an emergency "call " button/bulb , which immediately made my wonder why I might need it , which only lead me to thinking "seriously guys, why would I Need this thing?!, maybe don't even give it to me , I think I was better thinking I didn't have a choice, and again when or why might I Need it?!"
All turned out well, it's just very loud and it's odd how much you work at staying still, especially when a voice keeps telling you that you "are doing just fine,and remember to stay still", which makes you wonder if you are in fact staying still and if you are , why do they keep telling you to stay still, you know if are?!
Pretty sure if I would have had that done a few years ago, things would have been a lot different . I'd have been hungover, half lit and antsy as hell, would have hit that button in first five minutes , walked out and probably not rescheduled a new appt.
Instead I was able to calmly observe my thoughts , aware that they weren't the most comfortable thoughts one could experience but at the same realize that I was fine , a little nervous maybe but able to stay in my big boy pants literally and figuratively . An alcohol soaked nervous system constantly riding on the edge of a near panic attack is not an asset and not missed one little bit.

fantail

Hear, hear.

SoberinSyracuse

I know what you mean. Sanity is pretty awesome, isn't it?

Soberwolf

Congrats

zjw

thats good. I still have my moments now then. Oddly this monday i broke down in tears and it reminded me a lot like the early sobriety days. I thought geeze where is this coming from? but was thankful it was not something that happened a lot anymore.

I still dunno that I'm up for an MRI myself tho hahaha.

dwtbd

C'mon z I'm sure you could, I doubt i'd get past 1 mile let alone what you accomplish on a weekly basis.
Plus I cheated a little bit, I may have snickered at my mother's husband's failed attempts at the same test without sedation, so I had to right ?
By the end aside from the noise, you could almost nap.
I'm just grateful I don't add any artificially induced anxiety to the mix anymore.

least

The awful anxiety kept me drinking for too long. I just couldn't get past the first few days sober. Glad I finally took the plunge and just did it.

Wholesome

I've had 2 MRI's and yes they are noisy! Like the worst techno song ever created! I relaxed and closed my eyes for one of them, it was in the middle of the night and I was sleepy. Hope your results come back with good news dwtbd.

BBQBOY

Gotta love serenity!! Being in the tube is nothing like being held hostage by alcohol!! Glad you made it through and here's hoping you don't have to go in there again

SoberinSyracuse

SO TRUE! I'll take the tube over booze any day.

dwtbd

Finally got the results and they were good, big phewww. Had to wait a week just to get the scan and then a couple calls to get the results. I know I'm not the most important person on the planet, but that doesn't stop me from thinking I am ! lol

brynn

Great news dwtbd!! Oh, and you're pretty darn important around here!

Sorry I missed this thread, but heres to an alcohol free nervous system and to a guy whose posts have been very instrumental in my own sobriety!

Dave42001

The Worst Techno Song Ever..

Funny, that's exactly what it reminded me of! MRI's still wig me out, I'm glad I've only been in the tube once!