Diary of a Mad Cow, Part XVI: "Last Call"
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
Hoping the meds help Cow
I stayed home and ate my turkey and lingonberry jam standing by the kitchen counter--
not even a sit down meal, but I like my silence as well. . .
My brother kept emailing me to like his pictures of his holiday in Bali,
but even that was too "noisy" for me. I know you understand.
Quiet morning with my elderly dogs by the woodstove.
I'm on my second cup of coffee and Day 12.
Ready to get back out in the workforce tomorrow but not quite sure how.
I've been on holiday and that's when I literally lock the gate to my farm.
I live on the edge of National Forest so often will just walk in the woods
or watch the woodpeckers land at the feeder.
Unlocking the gate, coming out again and engaging people is sometimes
more than I can bear, but I bear it to keep the farm, among other reasons.
I am feeling pretty normal again--back to Borg land--but at peace which is something.
My hummingbirds have flown South for the winter--how are yours?
I stayed home and ate my turkey and lingonberry jam standing by the kitchen counter--
not even a sit down meal, but I like my silence as well. . .
My brother kept emailing me to like his pictures of his holiday in Bali,
but even that was too "noisy" for me. I know you understand.
Quiet morning with my elderly dogs by the woodstove.
I'm on my second cup of coffee and Day 12.
Ready to get back out in the workforce tomorrow but not quite sure how.
I've been on holiday and that's when I literally lock the gate to my farm.
I live on the edge of National Forest so often will just walk in the woods
or watch the woodpeckers land at the feeder.
Unlocking the gate, coming out again and engaging people is sometimes
more than I can bear, but I bear it to keep the farm, among other reasons.
I am feeling pretty normal again--back to Borg land--but at peace which is something.
My hummingbirds have flown South for the winter--how are yours?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
Hi walk;
Two dogs now--lost two in the last year from age
and now my two seniors get lots of spoiling and attention.
Had as many as 8 at one time and I was a fully assimilated member of the pack
Besides that, three cats and two horses, plus numbers of wild creatures which
hang around as we don't shoot guns at them (three local coyote packs, bobcats,
and the odd panther).
The deer are too numerous to count, here as in many places.
The birdlife is quite amazing, however, as we are near a great bird refuge.
I have four species of woodpecker in my yard or next to it,
and I keep three feeders going during the winter and let many weeds grow for seed in the Summer,
so we are the avian Country Kitchen Buffet.
We even have a particular bright red cardinal whom we call "The Manager"
as he orchestrates the feeder access.
Just put the log on the fire, pretty to watch as always-- hope you are having a good day too
Two dogs now--lost two in the last year from age
and now my two seniors get lots of spoiling and attention.
Had as many as 8 at one time and I was a fully assimilated member of the pack
Besides that, three cats and two horses, plus numbers of wild creatures which
hang around as we don't shoot guns at them (three local coyote packs, bobcats,
and the odd panther).
The deer are too numerous to count, here as in many places.
The birdlife is quite amazing, however, as we are near a great bird refuge.
I have four species of woodpecker in my yard or next to it,
and I keep three feeders going during the winter and let many weeds grow for seed in the Summer,
so we are the avian Country Kitchen Buffet.
We even have a particular bright red cardinal whom we call "The Manager"
as he orchestrates the feeder access.
Just put the log on the fire, pretty to watch as always-- hope you are having a good day too
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
That sound awesome, Hawk. Maybe after I lives with Shabs, I come live with you. 
I not make lot of noise, so we can sit in silence easy and will quick become known to locals as "those two weird Grey Garden crones."
Well, so far med is disaster. I know ...SHOCKING. Even at extreme low dose is cause total insomnia that not even my benzo can overcome, and my benzo has not ever fail to knock me out in 10 year! Hard to tell if it doing anything good, cuz I become stupid and discombobulated when not have sleep. Want to try to stay on it, cuz it kind of my "hail mary" pass at hope of any med, but not can go much longer without sleep. Trying not to fall into despair spiral over it.
Speaking of Cardinals, Hawk, at least I got some football coming up to babysit me today. Go Cards! My hummies is doing great. They voracious this time of year, so I feel like constant sugar water chef (but at least that one thing I can actual cook.) Pris is back, and Fatty, Tweak, and Tiny. Some epic fights. I have big piece of very old Manzanita out on patio now and is like maze of gnarly sticks, so they like to sit in that and stay very close to feeder. Today big fat Mourning Dove want to sit on the Manzanita too, and I like, dude, you gonna break it!
Hope you all is going okay.
I not make lot of noise, so we can sit in silence easy and will quick become known to locals as "those two weird Grey Garden crones."Well, so far med is disaster. I know ...SHOCKING. Even at extreme low dose is cause total insomnia that not even my benzo can overcome, and my benzo has not ever fail to knock me out in 10 year! Hard to tell if it doing anything good, cuz I become stupid and discombobulated when not have sleep. Want to try to stay on it, cuz it kind of my "hail mary" pass at hope of any med, but not can go much longer without sleep. Trying not to fall into despair spiral over it.
Speaking of Cardinals, Hawk, at least I got some football coming up to babysit me today. Go Cards! My hummies is doing great. They voracious this time of year, so I feel like constant sugar water chef (but at least that one thing I can actual cook.) Pris is back, and Fatty, Tweak, and Tiny. Some epic fights. I have big piece of very old Manzanita out on patio now and is like maze of gnarly sticks, so they like to sit in that and stay very close to feeder. Today big fat Mourning Dove want to sit on the Manzanita too, and I like, dude, you gonna break it!
Hope you all is going okay.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
I think I wouldn't mind going to stay for a while at Hawk's wildlife park as well :-) "Bobcats and panthers and deer, oh my!!"
Stick with it, Cow. As long as you don't feel at risk of a seizure you may as well guts it out. You never know, your body may adjust. It took me 7 weeks to get over the side effects of Prozac...felt really wound up and agitated. I know the side effects will be 100 times worse for you but if in the long run it helps that would be so fantastic.
Grey Gardens was absolutely fascinating. I felt really, really sorry for the daughter.
Go Cardinals!!!
Stick with it, Cow. As long as you don't feel at risk of a seizure you may as well guts it out. You never know, your body may adjust. It took me 7 weeks to get over the side effects of Prozac...felt really wound up and agitated. I know the side effects will be 100 times worse for you but if in the long run it helps that would be so fantastic.
Grey Gardens was absolutely fascinating. I felt really, really sorry for the daughter.
Go Cardinals!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,414
OK, Let's do this. . . Cow and shabs, you guys come and stay with me Summer / Fall
in the Northern Hemisphere, and then we'll go to your place in the Southern Hemisphere and enjoy your Spring and Summer. . .
I'll ring the agent and get the tics started--shabs, I do like Marmite, tomato, and cheese toast grilled on one side only for brekkie please
in the Northern Hemisphere, and then we'll go to your place in the Southern Hemisphere and enjoy your Spring and Summer. . .
I'll ring the agent and get the tics started--shabs, I do like Marmite, tomato, and cheese toast grilled on one side only for brekkie please
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
Been gone a few days, wallowing in the wealth of normal family love. I'm glad y'all are finding something in the holiday. We all deserve better. I love you each and every one and I will keep loving you. We do this together, yes? Hooahh?
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Welcome back, Trach!
Sleepies, I not sure what "normal family love" is, but I think it probable mean nobody in you family ever rape you, try to kills you with baseball bat, and/or says repeatedly that you "so damn dumb they wishes you was never born." ....that just my guess. Anything better than this, I total sign up for!
Looking forward to moving into you farm, Hawk. I will total help with farm work ...but not before 10AM, okay?
Sleepies, I not sure what "normal family love" is, but I think it probable mean nobody in you family ever rape you, try to kills you with baseball bat, and/or says repeatedly that you "so damn dumb they wishes you was never born." ....that just my guess. Anything better than this, I total sign up for!
Looking forward to moving into you farm, Hawk. I will total help with farm work ...but not before 10AM, okay?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
Missed you all.
Was away to give thanks and managed to get the flu instead.
I sign up for any group started by turtle or any of you guys.
Cow, close your eye cause i gonna say something corney but true.
Every thanksgiving I take a moment to think about the things I have to give thanks for, which living in Belgium was a bit more of a challenge this year, but all that stuff exaggerated anyway.
And one of the first things I thought of was you guys and gals. I give thanks for you and all you give me and each other.
So there.
Was away to give thanks and managed to get the flu instead.
I sign up for any group started by turtle or any of you guys.
Cow, close your eye cause i gonna say something corney but true.
Every thanksgiving I take a moment to think about the things I have to give thanks for, which living in Belgium was a bit more of a challenge this year, but all that stuff exaggerated anyway.
And one of the first things I thought of was you guys and gals. I give thanks for you and all you give me and each other.
So there.
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