malamute100

I'm at around month 7 into sobriety. After the horrible acute withdrawal came my PAWS .

I don't wish to put anybody off quitting alcohol , not everybody suffers PAWS.

But PAWS for me is so horrible it's helping me never wanting to drink again . There is no way I'm gonna risk going though the hell of PAWS again but having another drink .

I've just had 3 weeks , yes 3 whole good weeks , the longest I've felt good since September,
They felt so good I even could go cinema , shopping , restaurants etc . I felt like a new person .
However today the PAWS is back , I woke feeling depressed , dizzy , feelings of doom , panicky and was very tearful .

I always reach out to this site for help and encouragement of people going through the same as me , it so helps me knowing I'm not the only one , ive even made a few friends I message privately .

So today I'm doing the same .

I'd like to hear from other people that have had a long time of symptoms into their sobriety , I'd like to hear your stories of how long it took to feel better or if your still feeling bad many months after quitting .
It will really help me cause somtimes like today I feel it will never end .
Thanks SR.

JeffreyAK

PAWS can go on for a couple years with some folks, with dimishing frequency and severity but still lingering. Symptoms vary, too, depending on the person. When we whack our brains out of shape with usually many years of drinking, it can take time to recover. For me personally, my main longer-term symptom was being tired all the time, lack of energy and motivation, and that didn't really feel cleared up until I was about 10 months in. But it does get better all the time, and eventually goes away.

malamute100

I hope so , it's already messed up my job but now it's starting to mess up my relationship , she's getting fed up of my mood swings . She even sleeps in the spare room now due to my bouts of insomnia , lucky that seems to have got better .

Della1968

I am sorry I hope it is a brief episode for you.

TastyCheez

I'm going through something similar myself...though only on day 5 (so its not PAWS). Makes me scared for what's in store for me.

Every night and morning I feel like I have a wicked hangover (and I never got hangovers after drinking). My swings are milliseconds a part. Even now at the dinner table in a restaurant...my GF and I aren't talking because I'm a zombie (on purpose...nothing good to say, don't say anything).

Being 32, I own 4 businesses and am a biggish guy. My life is very stressful and I find myself crying (even before stopping the booze) randomly. I've had to step away from my staff a few times to sit down to calm myself.

Not relevant to the OP...just echoing that I hear ya and I'm just as frustrated. Curious what others say.

midgetcop

I don't have much advice to add, but just to commiserate with you. I'm only about 6 weeks in but I'm definitely in the thick of PAWS. Irritable, moody, fatigued, dizzy, no attention span, etc.

And to think, I'm still so early into this!

I started taking some B vitamin supplements today. I'm hoping they'll help with my energy levels.

Oh, and I'm eating M&M's right now. Because chocolate.

malamute100

My first 6 weeks sober was hell ,, not normal hell but hells hell ..
I quit drinking cold turkey after 20 years of heavy binge drinking!!

After the first six weeks ive then spent 6 months getting through a rolkercoaster of paws symptoms whilst trying to hold down an income and a relationship . I've also seen many Drs and specilist who's tests have all come back clear .

These are my reacurring cycles of paws symptoms

Insomnia ( can go 4 sleepless nights )
Nervousness
Anxiety
Tinnitus
Depression crying a lot
Sensative to loud noises ( no filter )
Blurred vision
Fatigue
Brain zaps
Feelings of doom
Stress sensative
Overwhelming derealization
Headaches
Get very stressed concentrating
Feel off
Foggy head
Panicky
Lightheaded ness
Hot flushes
Feel very unstable
Overwhelmed doing simple physical



tasks like brushing dog or cleaning ( flooding , unintentional mentle overload )
Multitasking is to much
Impatient
Angry outbursts

TastyCheez

Malamute,

All but one or two of those symptoms are some of the main reasons I stopped drinking in the first place. I feel like Adam Sandler on Click...just going through the motions but not 'feeling' anything except doom and sadness. Not looking forward to it continuing for so long whilst sober...

malamute100

It may not be as hard for you in sobriety , every body is different .
I feel my sobriety has been a very extreme case and I wish it on nobody
At least my symptoms don't stay and they let up after a while .
I just have to keep saying 'it will pass' and 'if I didn't die whilst drinking why will I die being sober '

I will never drink again and I look foward to one day writing a post here thanking everybody when it's all over

Fluffer

Sorry Malamute, those symptoms sound pretty harsh. I was a weekend binge drinker for 25 years or so and at 6+ months sober now my main PAWS symptoms are (a) feeling some what flat (unable to ring the "bell") and (b) feeling somewhat lazy and unmotivated. I'm hoping (b) will go away and it's not just my true nature showing itself. As for (a), I'm told that it should get better with time, although of course we will hopefully never again get to feel the raw flood of endorphins from drinking or using. My other complaint is bad memory/possible brain damage that started in my teens. While I can function highly doing difficult mental work, my memory for names of people and things like movies is embarrassingly bad. Hope it's not dementia. Yikes.

Hawkeye13

I had some pretty tough PAWs as well, including the lack of affect / mental flatness / unmotivation you are talking about Fluffer.

These days things are slowly getting much better on all fronts--
I am getting quite a bit of work done, and having something like "enjoyment" of life once again in a muted way.

Mentally I was very dull at the beginning, and I also was also worried about things like
memory and processing.

I think for a living so this was really troubling at the beginning of my sobriety
and quite frankly hard to "cover" at work for a good long while.

Now I find myself reading theoretical physics for "fun" so it seems possible that all will come back and more with excellent nutrition,
mental health support, and lots of rest and recovery.
I also advocate a structured program of exercise and yoga / mediation to "get back in your body" if you know what I mean--

Hang in there guys--sobriety is absolutely the best decision I have ever made
in terms of quality of life

sugarbear1

just know that PAWS means your body and brain are still healing!

Healing is good. Know this and forge forward.

I know for me that horrible hangovers didn't stop me from getting to work and making it through the day so I could drink again, so I thought that getting through PAWS was doable and that one day they may not be here.

Guess what?! They aren't here now! Amazing!

mfanch

I had PAWS off and on for a few years. Every once in a while I will still have a twinge, but as time passes they become fewer and less intense.

EverNew

Recognise a lot of this. My working memory seems more or less incapacitated. I too worry anxiously about suffering lasting/permanent damage. I am 3 weeks into recovery after a few months trying to quit and disastrous relapses. Am restless but lacking in energy at the same time. Very much recognise the lack of motivation. Have to force myself to do anything - what I most enjoy is sleep...which I'm fortunate enough to get even though it's not of the greatest quality. I too read PAWS posts and find the thought of years of symptoms so so terrifying. Wish I had never done this to myself. Pointless, that, I know. It is what it is.

lighter

It gets better, guys.

Andante

At 2 years + 3 months sober, I still have recurrences of many of the symptoms you mention. They were really bad for a very long time. Like you, I used to get soooooo frustrated and frantic about feeling so awful, and like you, I felt compelled to list and categorize every imperfection in how I felt and functioned. I worried myself sick over whether I was going to feel this way for the rest of my life.

Then I realized I wasn't helping matters at all by getting so frantic about it. I may not have a choice in the symptoms I experience, but I do have a choice in how I react to them. My limitations and debilities get me down only if I let them. For example, I could easily become frustrated by how long it's taking me to type this post because my ability to verbalize is still unreliable and my fingers still jump all over the keyboard (thank goodness for the backspace key!), but I just say the Serenity Prayer and soldier on. The process of acceptance and surrender that brought me relief from my alcoholism applies also to its aftermath.

Hope you feel better soon!

daz135

Hey malamute
Sorry to hear your struggle. I quit for 4+months last year and paws is what drove me back to drinking. Deppresion mostly.
I'm pretty successful in my life, I've represented my country at the highest level in my previous sport. I run a good business. But the depression nearly broke me. Suicide thoughts, crying at work (hid that) miserable all the time. Everything was so twisted in my mind I had no idea what was real. I'm married and all but no one had a clue I couldn't get help from anyone. It's by far the worst place mentally I've ever been. I don't really have any answers for you just sympathy!

Berrybean

Hi - sorry to hear you're feeling so rubbish.

I had a fairly awful episode myself, and must say that the info and advice given on this article PAWS | Digital Dharma was fairly accurate for my experiences.

I can definitely say that cutting out added sugar and processed food (which I'd really upped my intake of when quitting alcohol) helps make my moods more manageable.
I'm in AA so am working the 12-step programme, and have plenty of support, which also really helped (once I started actually using those things rather than sitting in the rooms waiting for the sobriety fairy to sprinkle me with her recovery dust, which I was most certainly guilty of doing - not saying anyone else is, just sharing my own experiences). I am currently (15 months sober) very happy and stable emotionally - for me anyway .

Hoping you get past this soon. It's a terrible thing, and the closest to suicidal that I have ever been. Lucky for me I have a good boss who tried her hardest to get me through that phase and is courageously outspoken, and took me to task and helped me realise how bad it'd got, while others were keeping a diplomatic distance and silence while secretly worrying about me.

Take care all of you who are feeling the strain of PAWs at the moment xx

Twotone

I'm going through the same thing. Had no idea there was even a name for it. Sorry to all those going through it. It's hell. I wake up not knowing who or where I am, constant panic and feelings I cant even describe, like I have gone crazy, confused, just bizarre feelings. Been 2 months and all I want to do is drink to make it stop. very dark thoughts all the time, feeling like all the 'treatments' out there are pointless. Can't believe I've lasted 2 months. Hope it fades soon but thinking about it and the fact nothing helps it is the worst.

malamute100

Sorry to hear that two tone .
I have no answers , I'm at 7 months and if I had a gun I think I'd kill myself . This paws has compleatly ruined my life . I'm on day 7 with hardly any sleep . I cant function , I can't work and my partner has had Enough . I want out