How it was--What happened--How it is now ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
How it was--What happened--How it is now ?
How it was ?
I was running with the liquid devil and knew not how to stop drinking.
What happened ?
Hit a bottom with self, life, wife, the law and God.
How it is now ?
Enjoying a nice sober life with the wife and God up top the mountain.
Please share you experiences strengths and hopes with us.
Mountainmanbob
I was running with the liquid devil and knew not how to stop drinking.
What happened ?
Hit a bottom with self, life, wife, the law and God.
How it is now ?
Enjoying a nice sober life with the wife and God up top the mountain.
Please share you experiences strengths and hopes with us.
Mountainmanbob
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Wow - not much response to this thread. I'm surprised ??
How it was ?
It was very hard back before I retired and was drinking each day and night. It was such a struggle to hold onto my job as the boss kept calling me out for my drinking on the job. As much as I wanted to not drink while at work, I needed a drink or two ever hour or two.
Today -- I'm free from all that.
MM
How it was ?
It was very hard back before I retired and was drinking each day and night. It was such a struggle to hold onto my job as the boss kept calling me out for my drinking on the job. As much as I wanted to not drink while at work, I needed a drink or two ever hour or two.
Today -- I'm free from all that.
MM
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Alcohol was my security blanket until one day I realized it had twisted into a noose...getting tighter each day. Thanks to SR, my family and a lot of work every day I have been freed. The blanket is gone forever though, it's permanently become a noose waiting just around the bend....vigilance is always necessary.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,021
How it was:
- successful career
- large house, luxury cars and all the trimmings
- bingeing uncontrollably every week
- overwhelmed by feelings of paranoia, self-loathing, no self esteem, no self-confidence, obsessed about drinking,
- daily wake ups to a sense of dread, despair, DTs, guilt, shame and remorse
- frequent wake ups with strange injuries
What happened:
- received a DUI and kicked out of home for 6 months
How is it now:
- tough external life with income and work
- my children finally have a sober, present and loving father
- my children actually like me now (or at least more than before
)
- my internal life has gone from sub-zero to slowly and gradually blossoming; by that I mean, I have days when I cant stop smiling, I rarely have days when I am depressed or sad (moments yes but they pass)
No overall score as that is meaningless for me. Its taken me this long to finally understand that the journey is everything and that life is to be lived for the present. Being present, here and now and being of service to others is paramount.
- successful career
- large house, luxury cars and all the trimmings
- bingeing uncontrollably every week
- overwhelmed by feelings of paranoia, self-loathing, no self esteem, no self-confidence, obsessed about drinking,
- daily wake ups to a sense of dread, despair, DTs, guilt, shame and remorse
- frequent wake ups with strange injuries
What happened:
- received a DUI and kicked out of home for 6 months
How is it now:
- tough external life with income and work
- my children finally have a sober, present and loving father
- my children actually like me now (or at least more than before
)- my internal life has gone from sub-zero to slowly and gradually blossoming; by that I mean, I have days when I cant stop smiling, I rarely have days when I am depressed or sad (moments yes but they pass)
No overall score as that is meaningless for me. Its taken me this long to finally understand that the journey is everything and that life is to be lived for the present. Being present, here and now and being of service to others is paramount.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by Mountainmanbob 
Wow - not much response to this thread. I'm surprised ??
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
How it was:
Around 2006 I was what I would call a heavy drinker. I was in college and frequented bars probably 3-5 times a week and was in luck because there was a train that went directly from the bar to my house. I found drink specials and genuinely loved going out. I looked great, I was young and fun. I socialized and didn't even know what a blackout was. Hangovers were pretty much non-existent. I remember sitting in a lecture hall with a splitting headache one morning and that was a surprise. I felt great while sober and I felt even better while drinking.
I remember specifically how much of a fifth of vodka was left after a night of drinking at home during this time. The vodka would only be down about two inches from the top of the bottle. Another specific thing I remember is that I would stop drinking about an hour before bed and drink water. I was aware that drinking water before bed would help me feel fine in the morning and it did.
I graduated and then started drinking at home. Around 2008 I had my first total blackout. It was at home and I got in an argument with my guy. I was sobbing hysterically about some nonsensical thing (that I wouldn't have even mentioned had I been sober). When I say sobbing I mean to the point where you can barely breathe. I woke up the next morning in shock. What had I done? Thank god it was at home so nobody knew.
I had a very specific "place" I liked to reach every night at home. Oh yeah, I drank 7 nights a week at this point, around 2008. What evening would be complete without alcohol? Not mine. The nightly buzz (it still was a "buzz") at this point.
The quantity kept increasing. In 2008, I was satisfied with exactly one fifth of vodka a night. I started getting splitting headaches at work and would take aspirin every morning in the staff room, the "staff aspirin."
Fast forward to 2010. Blackouts were a weekly occurrence. I had a variety of different kinds of blackouts. There was the hysterical sobbing ones where I would weep in front my guy or even in front of audiences at parties. As I type this, I remember one Halloween blackout where I sat on a picnic table downtown on the nightlife street weeping with four people comforting me. I think I was weeping about missing my family who lived in a different state. The next and new type of blackout was the angry blackout. And when I say angry, I mean I would go into rages. I would scream profanities, throw books or remote controllers, and rant and rave about my life and any and everything that I was feeling. These were also sometimes in private and other times with an audience. On several occasions I became physically aggressive with people.
I could write 14 pages about the blackouts but I can sum the rest up in a few words. I woke up covered in blood twice. Once from a busted-open chin by falling face-first into a dresser and the other time was from knocking so hard on a window that it broke, cut my knuckles deeply, and once again....passing out without any attempt to bandage them or clean myself up. There was blood all over the house because after both injuries, I paced angrily around the house ranting and raving, dripping all the way. Others involved clothing mishaps where I walked around in a blackout at a party with my shirt ripped and exposing my body. I woke up in the ripped shirt and remembered what happened. So, those were the blackouts.
The hangovers became unbearable. Unbelievable. What I thought was hangovers were really daily withdrawals. Thank goodness I never vomited, otherwise they might have caught on at work.
And did I mention the quantity kept increasing? It was taking 12-14 units of vodka at this point to satisfy me to feel comfortable to either pass out and blackout. I blacked out on work nights as often as weekends.
Weekends were spent on the couch, feeling absolutely horrible. I started taking one day off a week on Sundays because if I tried to drink Sunday night I would feel like I was going to vomit. Sometimes I could get those first few shots down and get into "the zone" and then continue drinking that night. Others I was not able to get the first few shots down so I would either spit them out or not try in the first place. I would drink again Monday night.
Perhaps the worst part of this whole story was the mental obsession I had with alcohol. I literally could not NOT drink one single night. I was obsessed with it. I have done astonishing things to get to alcohol when it was not immediately available. I have walked miles in rain, snow, and on the sides of busy highways to liquor stores. Usually I was walking because I was out of town without a car and there was nowhere near the hotel. Or I was camping, etc. Or I was too drunk to drive so walking to get more at 11 pm on a work night sounded like a great idea on a work night with an important meeting in the morning. I was hungover every day at work from 2009-2014. Or in other words, there was not ONE DAY in those five years that I was NOT hungover. I honestly did not know what it was like to exist without a hangover.
The saving grace to my story? I never drove drunk. Not sure why, but I always had a keen awareness not to do this. Not sure why.
Fast forward to the last year. I had had a nagging pain in my side. I had even called around to doctors and asked if they could do a full workup anonymously. I didn't want anything on my record or else that might mean that I had to stop.
Around 2014 I was diagnosed with a serious health condition caused by my drinking so I had two choices: stop or die. And when I say die, it would have been sooner than later. I had also gained 60 pounds. My body was in terrible shape. When I would wake up hungover, my legs were even achy. This was on top of a pounding headache, dehydration, shakes, diarrhea, sweaty clammy skin, a red, hot face, visible veins on my thighs (?), and general feelings of doom and death. This was every single day.
June 27th, 2014 I took my last drink. Did the health diagnosis stop me? No. Did the blackouts stop me? No. What stopped me? The HANGOVERS. I could not live through one more. I couldn't stand them. They had gotten so bad, I honestly wondered, how DO people feel who die from drinking? Could they possibly feel any worse than this?. Another very important detail: I couldn't get drunk anymore starting around 2013. I got sloppy and uncoordinated but not classically drunk. I felt after 12 drinks the way I would imagine someone would feel after sniffing way too much paint or some other chemical. Sloppy, stupid, slurring, but nothing like I used to get, the nice, warm, buzz. It used to be that drinking was like getting into a jacuzzi, warm and wonderful. For the past year it was like someone holding a rag drenched in gasoline over my mouth. I felt like crap when I wasn't drinking and when I was drinking. I was so lost.
I had no formal detox but I probably should have. A year before I stopped, my blood pressure was 180-something over something. My doctor called it "stroke level." I thought that was interesting. What if I would have died from a stroke or heart attack rather than organ failure? I always figured it would be organ failure so it was quite surprising to learn how much alcohol was affecting other parts of my body.
I have been sober about 10 months. All of the health problems I had have gone away, completely. I am still emerging from PAWS. There were times at six months sobriety where I woke up with phantom hangovers, as strange as that sounds. I was walking in fog several months.
I never actually thought I would stop but I did and I am never going to drink again. If you read all the way to the end, please know you can stop too.
Around 2006 I was what I would call a heavy drinker. I was in college and frequented bars probably 3-5 times a week and was in luck because there was a train that went directly from the bar to my house. I found drink specials and genuinely loved going out. I looked great, I was young and fun. I socialized and didn't even know what a blackout was. Hangovers were pretty much non-existent. I remember sitting in a lecture hall with a splitting headache one morning and that was a surprise. I felt great while sober and I felt even better while drinking.
I remember specifically how much of a fifth of vodka was left after a night of drinking at home during this time. The vodka would only be down about two inches from the top of the bottle. Another specific thing I remember is that I would stop drinking about an hour before bed and drink water. I was aware that drinking water before bed would help me feel fine in the morning and it did.
I graduated and then started drinking at home. Around 2008 I had my first total blackout. It was at home and I got in an argument with my guy. I was sobbing hysterically about some nonsensical thing (that I wouldn't have even mentioned had I been sober). When I say sobbing I mean to the point where you can barely breathe. I woke up the next morning in shock. What had I done? Thank god it was at home so nobody knew.
I had a very specific "place" I liked to reach every night at home. Oh yeah, I drank 7 nights a week at this point, around 2008. What evening would be complete without alcohol? Not mine. The nightly buzz (it still was a "buzz") at this point.
The quantity kept increasing. In 2008, I was satisfied with exactly one fifth of vodka a night. I started getting splitting headaches at work and would take aspirin every morning in the staff room, the "staff aspirin."
Fast forward to 2010. Blackouts were a weekly occurrence. I had a variety of different kinds of blackouts. There was the hysterical sobbing ones where I would weep in front my guy or even in front of audiences at parties. As I type this, I remember one Halloween blackout where I sat on a picnic table downtown on the nightlife street weeping with four people comforting me. I think I was weeping about missing my family who lived in a different state. The next and new type of blackout was the angry blackout. And when I say angry, I mean I would go into rages. I would scream profanities, throw books or remote controllers, and rant and rave about my life and any and everything that I was feeling. These were also sometimes in private and other times with an audience. On several occasions I became physically aggressive with people.
I could write 14 pages about the blackouts but I can sum the rest up in a few words. I woke up covered in blood twice. Once from a busted-open chin by falling face-first into a dresser and the other time was from knocking so hard on a window that it broke, cut my knuckles deeply, and once again....passing out without any attempt to bandage them or clean myself up. There was blood all over the house because after both injuries, I paced angrily around the house ranting and raving, dripping all the way. Others involved clothing mishaps where I walked around in a blackout at a party with my shirt ripped and exposing my body. I woke up in the ripped shirt and remembered what happened. So, those were the blackouts.
The hangovers became unbearable. Unbelievable. What I thought was hangovers were really daily withdrawals. Thank goodness I never vomited, otherwise they might have caught on at work.
And did I mention the quantity kept increasing? It was taking 12-14 units of vodka at this point to satisfy me to feel comfortable to either pass out and blackout. I blacked out on work nights as often as weekends.
Weekends were spent on the couch, feeling absolutely horrible. I started taking one day off a week on Sundays because if I tried to drink Sunday night I would feel like I was going to vomit. Sometimes I could get those first few shots down and get into "the zone" and then continue drinking that night. Others I was not able to get the first few shots down so I would either spit them out or not try in the first place. I would drink again Monday night.
Perhaps the worst part of this whole story was the mental obsession I had with alcohol. I literally could not NOT drink one single night. I was obsessed with it. I have done astonishing things to get to alcohol when it was not immediately available. I have walked miles in rain, snow, and on the sides of busy highways to liquor stores. Usually I was walking because I was out of town without a car and there was nowhere near the hotel. Or I was camping, etc. Or I was too drunk to drive so walking to get more at 11 pm on a work night sounded like a great idea on a work night with an important meeting in the morning. I was hungover every day at work from 2009-2014. Or in other words, there was not ONE DAY in those five years that I was NOT hungover. I honestly did not know what it was like to exist without a hangover.
The saving grace to my story? I never drove drunk. Not sure why, but I always had a keen awareness not to do this. Not sure why.
Fast forward to the last year. I had had a nagging pain in my side. I had even called around to doctors and asked if they could do a full workup anonymously. I didn't want anything on my record or else that might mean that I had to stop.
Around 2014 I was diagnosed with a serious health condition caused by my drinking so I had two choices: stop or die. And when I say die, it would have been sooner than later. I had also gained 60 pounds. My body was in terrible shape. When I would wake up hungover, my legs were even achy. This was on top of a pounding headache, dehydration, shakes, diarrhea, sweaty clammy skin, a red, hot face, visible veins on my thighs (?), and general feelings of doom and death. This was every single day.
June 27th, 2014 I took my last drink. Did the health diagnosis stop me? No. Did the blackouts stop me? No. What stopped me? The HANGOVERS. I could not live through one more. I couldn't stand them. They had gotten so bad, I honestly wondered, how DO people feel who die from drinking? Could they possibly feel any worse than this?. Another very important detail: I couldn't get drunk anymore starting around 2013. I got sloppy and uncoordinated but not classically drunk. I felt after 12 drinks the way I would imagine someone would feel after sniffing way too much paint or some other chemical. Sloppy, stupid, slurring, but nothing like I used to get, the nice, warm, buzz. It used to be that drinking was like getting into a jacuzzi, warm and wonderful. For the past year it was like someone holding a rag drenched in gasoline over my mouth. I felt like crap when I wasn't drinking and when I was drinking. I was so lost.
I had no formal detox but I probably should have. A year before I stopped, my blood pressure was 180-something over something. My doctor called it "stroke level." I thought that was interesting. What if I would have died from a stroke or heart attack rather than organ failure? I always figured it would be organ failure so it was quite surprising to learn how much alcohol was affecting other parts of my body.
I have been sober about 10 months. All of the health problems I had have gone away, completely. I am still emerging from PAWS. There were times at six months sobriety where I woke up with phantom hangovers, as strange as that sounds. I was walking in fog several months.
I never actually thought I would stop but I did and I am never going to drink again. If you read all the way to the end, please know you can stop too.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,126
Originally Posted by Mountainmanbob
How it is now --
I will not forget the past or wish to shut the door on it.
MM
I will not forget the past or wish to shut the door on it.
MM
(o:
NoelleR
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,256
Right now I would consider myself a weekend drinker. I stay abstinent during the week with meetings, etc., but end up drinking on the weekend (I end up binging). I would like to eventually get to a place where I am totally sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by NoelleR
"We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it." (AA BB, Chapter 6, Into Action, pg 83)
NoelleR
also for me, or wish to forget the past.
It's easy to deceive myself (forget) the past after there have been many years away from the drink.
Mountainman
Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 2,126
Originally Posted by Mountainmanbob
True, I will not regret the past
also for me, or wish to forget the past.
It's easy to deceive myself (forget) the past after there have been many years away from the drink.
Mountainman
also for me, or wish to forget the past.
It's easy to deceive myself (forget) the past after there have been many years away from the drink.
Mountainman
(o:
NoelleR
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Edmonton AB
Posts: 13
How it was:
Started drinking in 2010 due to mounting personal problems which triggered self pity and low self esteem. At first I got the happy warm fuzzies. Within months I was drinking on a daily basis. Drinking while driving, promiscuity, just never wanting the party to stop and felt like I needed alcohol to be outgoing.
I would wake up and need a drink, not because of tremors, just because I simply did not want to be present. Life started to unravel. Bad decisions made. Co dependent relationships formed.
In 2014 I had a breakdown and moved. In the last year, my drinking increased . I became a blackout drunk. Drink until passed out. If I ran out of wine, I would either drive or stumble to the store, just for that last drink to send me into oblivion. Surprisingly no DUI's.
The blackouts were the scariest part, glad to know I am not the only one who would wake up and wonder what happened? Did I hit someone? How did I get home? Where did this bruise come from? What did I say???
What happened:
Ultimately, my last drinking day was last Sunday, mother's day. Blacked out. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I felt like death, contemplating suicide once again. But something inside of me clicked this time. I honestly was tired of living a lie. Scared, frightened of what the future would hold if I continued drinking. Tired of hiding from my realities.
Thursday, "discovered" this burn on my stomach must have been from cooking dinner on Sunday. Further evidence that surely alcohol would and will be the death of me.
Right now:
I am on day 9. I follow SR throughout the day. I have had some weak moments, but the thought that one sip, one drink of alcohol could send me over the edge keeps me from drinking. Reading the Big Book slowly. Doing soduku, facebook games, eating vast amounts of ice cream bars and chocolate to keep sugar levels up.
Being sober is getting easier in that I don't feel the physical withdrawals much. My emotions are transient. One moment happy and hopeful, the next sad and regretful. Overall, I do not want the drink. I am mindful of everything it has taken from me. I am mindful of everything it will cost me. I am mindful that it (the craving/AV) will always be there in my weakest moments.
Most importantly, I am mindful.
Started drinking in 2010 due to mounting personal problems which triggered self pity and low self esteem. At first I got the happy warm fuzzies. Within months I was drinking on a daily basis. Drinking while driving, promiscuity, just never wanting the party to stop and felt like I needed alcohol to be outgoing.
I would wake up and need a drink, not because of tremors, just because I simply did not want to be present. Life started to unravel. Bad decisions made. Co dependent relationships formed.
In 2014 I had a breakdown and moved. In the last year, my drinking increased . I became a blackout drunk. Drink until passed out. If I ran out of wine, I would either drive or stumble to the store, just for that last drink to send me into oblivion. Surprisingly no DUI's.
The blackouts were the scariest part, glad to know I am not the only one who would wake up and wonder what happened? Did I hit someone? How did I get home? Where did this bruise come from? What did I say???
What happened:
Ultimately, my last drinking day was last Sunday, mother's day. Blacked out. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I felt like death, contemplating suicide once again. But something inside of me clicked this time. I honestly was tired of living a lie. Scared, frightened of what the future would hold if I continued drinking. Tired of hiding from my realities.
Thursday, "discovered" this burn on my stomach must have been from cooking dinner on Sunday. Further evidence that surely alcohol would and will be the death of me.
Right now:
I am on day 9. I follow SR throughout the day. I have had some weak moments, but the thought that one sip, one drink of alcohol could send me over the edge keeps me from drinking. Reading the Big Book slowly. Doing soduku, facebook games, eating vast amounts of ice cream bars and chocolate to keep sugar levels up.
Being sober is getting easier in that I don't feel the physical withdrawals much. My emotions are transient. One moment happy and hopeful, the next sad and regretful. Overall, I do not want the drink. I am mindful of everything it has taken from me. I am mindful of everything it will cost me. I am mindful that it (the craving/AV) will always be there in my weakest moments.
Most importantly, I am mindful.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Indiana
Posts: 118
Both of my parents died from alcoholism so I was determined (early on) to never allow myself to follow in their footsteps. However, in around 2006, I started drinking wine on a relatively frequent basis. I would say within 6 months - 1 year, I was drinking at least a couple of bottles daily. At this point, my life was still manageable and under control. After a year or so, I determined (self prognosis) that the pounding headaches were definitely caused by the wine drinking so I moved on to vodka. I can definitely relate (very much so) to Melinda's story above. Initially, the amount of vodka that I drank was very small. It didn't take nearly the amount of alcohol to get the same drunk feeling that had been taking 2 bottles of wine to accomplish. But... as with any other drink, the more I had, the more I wanted/needed to sustain my habit. I cannot even begin to explain how quickly EVERYTHING took a drastic turn for the worst. Lost my job, lost my house, and started losing my sanity.
I would say from 2010-2014, I drank a fifth of vodka every night. 7 days a week. I gained a ton of weight, looked like death warmed over, and felt just as bad as I looked. I couldn't care less what anyone thought or felt about me... including myself. I absolutely hated myself.
June 5, 2014 - my last night of drunken stupidity. I passed out (cried myself to sleep) in the basement, feeling sorry for myself because of (yet another) failed relationship in my life. This time, I had absolutely nothing else to blame except for alcohol. *Every other failed relationship, I could easily convince myself it was because "he was a jerk" or "he cheated on me". Not this time. This time was all me.
June 6, 2014 - I dragged myself out of bed and called in sick to work. *A common occurrence over the last year or so was waking up still too drunk from the night before to be able to drive my daughter to school and myself to work. We had lots and lots of "sick" days toward the end.
I would say from 2010-2014, I drank a fifth of vodka every night. 7 days a week. I gained a ton of weight, looked like death warmed over, and felt just as bad as I looked. I couldn't care less what anyone thought or felt about me... including myself. I absolutely hated myself.
June 5, 2014 - my last night of drunken stupidity. I passed out (cried myself to sleep) in the basement, feeling sorry for myself because of (yet another) failed relationship in my life. This time, I had absolutely nothing else to blame except for alcohol. *Every other failed relationship, I could easily convince myself it was because "he was a jerk" or "he cheated on me". Not this time. This time was all me.
June 6, 2014 - I dragged myself out of bed and called in sick to work. *A common occurrence over the last year or so was waking up still too drunk from the night before to be able to drive my daughter to school and myself to work. We had lots and lots of "sick" days toward the end.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
How it was
How it is now ?
As I look back at my drunken life today
it seems as if I was in a daily war and thought that to be normal.
Today the serenity is overwhelming.
Total change of ones being.
They told me that, "I would have to change everything."
Why did I put up such a fight?
M-Bob
How it is now ?
As I look back at my drunken life today
it seems as if I was in a daily war and thought that to be normal.
Today the serenity is overwhelming.
Total change of ones being.
They told me that, "I would have to change everything."
Why did I put up such a fight?
M-Bob
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 1,601
How it was (at the end)/What happened (merging the two):
Lost job
Lost condo
Lost all self respect
Lost contact with God
Was drinking 24/7 - unable to do anything else (including shower or brush my teeth)
Suicide attempts
Rehabs
Mental institutions
Constant drama and fear and anxiety
How it is now:
On the whole...very calm and steady
Actively seeking God
Working a program of recovery
Glad to wake up every morning sober (not sick)
Glad to be able to shower and brush my teeth without gagging
Working in my career field again
Rending a room and bath in a private house
Really enjoying my sober little life!
Lost job
Lost condo
Lost all self respect
Lost contact with God
Was drinking 24/7 - unable to do anything else (including shower or brush my teeth)
Suicide attempts
Rehabs
Mental institutions
Constant drama and fear and anxiety
How it is now:
On the whole...very calm and steady
Actively seeking God
Working a program of recovery
Glad to wake up every morning sober (not sick)
Glad to be able to shower and brush my teeth without gagging
Working in my career field again
Rending a room and bath in a private house
Really enjoying my sober little life!
Guest
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 772
Where I was: I was at a point where I drink as soon as I eoke up. I would usually pass out midday then wake up to drink more. All but one friend stopped talking to me. Bad relationships. Got a few DUIs. No job, car, license, money, and my future wasn't looking too good.
What it was like: I wae moving slowly downhill from the moment I first tried drugs and alcohol. I was slowly theowing more and more of my life away getting worse every year. My family and friends were watching me slowly kill myself with my drinking and drug use. Theybhave witnessed me go to the hospital more than once due to withdrawal seizures. I never realizee how bad things were in my active addiction.
What it's like now: Wow. Today my life is very different. I am extremely grateful for everything I have. Today I have w wonderful, supportive geoup of friends and family. People trust me. Because my sobriety I have gained my driving privileges back. Drive around a nice car. Moved out of my parents. Am in my 2nd semester of college. Active AAer. Along with a friend started a young person AA group. I even have keys to the church! I also have a job and a bank account. I am very blessed. My future is lookimg extremely bright as long as I continue to do the right things and work on my recovery every day.
Good thread.
What it was like: I wae moving slowly downhill from the moment I first tried drugs and alcohol. I was slowly theowing more and more of my life away getting worse every year. My family and friends were watching me slowly kill myself with my drinking and drug use. Theybhave witnessed me go to the hospital more than once due to withdrawal seizures. I never realizee how bad things were in my active addiction.
What it's like now: Wow. Today my life is very different. I am extremely grateful for everything I have. Today I have w wonderful, supportive geoup of friends and family. People trust me. Because my sobriety I have gained my driving privileges back. Drive around a nice car. Moved out of my parents. Am in my 2nd semester of college. Active AAer. Along with a friend started a young person AA group. I even have keys to the church! I also have a job and a bank account. I am very blessed. My future is lookimg extremely bright as long as I continue to do the right things and work on my recovery every day.
Good thread.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Dublin
Posts: 75
How it was: Drinking heavily for 30 years, at first to overcome social anxiety then just because I didn't know how to stop. All the usual stuff we are all familiar with, rotating shops so it didn't look too bad, calculating drinking time available, hundreds of "attempts" to stop, leaving social events early so I could drink "properly".
What happened: Got sick and tired of the constant merry-go-round of buying beer, hiding drinking, going into work tired and under-performing, more stress, buying beer... rinse and repeat. Sick and tired of declining fitness and increased weight. Met a wonderful lady (who hardly drank at all).
Now: Relief, pure and simple. Over a year under my belt. Humble, fit and happy. Proud of myself (though conscious of pride before a fall). Vigilant.
What happened: Got sick and tired of the constant merry-go-round of buying beer, hiding drinking, going into work tired and under-performing, more stress, buying beer... rinse and repeat. Sick and tired of declining fitness and increased weight. Met a wonderful lady (who hardly drank at all).
Now: Relief, pure and simple. Over a year under my belt. Humble, fit and happy. Proud of myself (though conscious of pride before a fall). Vigilant.
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