KAD

Yep, today marks one week since beginning yet again. I go to see a counselor today to get on a path to putting a stop to the pattern of staying sober a few months, drinking for about a month, sober a few more, drunk again, and so on... These first few sessions are more a consultation to determine what sort of counseling is needed. I will be more choosy this time, as the last counselor, although very nice, was not very effective in helping me with my problem.

Other than all that, had the kids for the weekend. It was good to be sober with them again and not just want to sleep during the day.

doggonecarl

Good that you are giving sobriety another go.

A good counselor, I'm sure, can make a difference. But as you go through your counseling, ask yourself this: How effective have you been in helping yourself with your problem?

downtown3

That sounds like my early attempt to quit for good. It took a complete 180 in my life and routine to stop for good. Dropped friends, stopped going out, started a little internet business to keep busy, found a good job, started working out daily. Big changes produces bigger results. Saying you going to stop and continue on your routine will result in you being back to square one in a few months.

KAD

Not effective enough, apparently! Pretty damn lazy about it, to be honest. The times I went back to drinking, I didn't even put up a fight. There was no internal struggle, just a conscious decision to go get a bottle, with the delusion, of course, that I'll either be able to moderate or it'll be easier to quit this time. Sometimes, I've even had the mindset that there would be no point in quitting, because I haven't yet built a sober life that I value too much to give up.

KAD

The meeting with a counselor yesterday went great! This is free counseling through my work and she did a much better job than the addictions counselor I was seeing, and only in the first session. She recognized right off the bat that I'm just languishing and stagnating. I'm getting bogged down by worries and stress but not really doing much of anything to fix it because I don't really know where to start. She actually gave me a list of "assignments" to complete before our next session. No therapist I've had has ever done that. She's very energetic and proactive and I have good feelings about this.

least

I'm so glad she's a good fit for you and just what you need. I see a counselor and she's worth her weight in gold. I hope this is the help you need to stop drinking for good.

Aellyce

That sounds great about the counselor, GMO. I also had these instant feelings about my therapists, in the first session. The first one I saw, I strongly felt that he was not going to be a good fit after about 20 minutes of conversation. I only saw him twice, then got a new one. This second one, I liked him even before the first session with him, reading online about the approach he uses and a phone consultation. I absolutely love working with him, I really trust him now. He also gives me a lot of homework sometimes. His thinking style is quite a lot like mine - this is something I was looking for in a therapist before I started, because I know that I'm usually most strongly attracted to "thinkalikes" in all sorts of relationships and I thought that would probably work well in the therapist's office also that, by definition, will have to be heavy on analysis and interpretation. It does work!

Good luck

Soberwolf

Well done on 7 days you can do it getmeout good luck

KAD

I keep feeling the need to post something but don't really have a lot to say. I'm on Day 10. I feel impatient with myself a lot. Relapse is such a setback, but I know the only way to remedy that problem is to not do it anymore.

I am almost finished with the "assignments" my counselor gave me. One of the last ones left is to find an AA group I think is a good fit for me. I had actually found one before that I kinda liked, but they meet on Tuesdays and Fridays. I have my kids on Tuesdays, and then I have them every other weekend, starting with Friday evening. The most I would be able to attend that meeting would be once every other week. So, there are a couple others I haven't tried yet. I'm hopeful one of them will be what I'm looking for.

Other than that, I've been feeling strange for about 2 weeks now. Physically strange. My head feels tight and sometimes I find I can't think straight at all. I feel shaky, weak, and anxious. I also have episodes where it feels like the ground is shaking or moving. It's probably just more of the same anxiety issues I've been dealing with since around July, but I'm not sure. Seeing my doctor again next Tuesday. I'll talk it over with him then.

Soberwolf

Well done on day 10 your body is adjusting so it will take time

if in doubt book a doc apt

well done on 10 days again fantastic news friend

Dee74

Mental fogginess is pretty normal Getmeout - at least for a few weeks. Do check with your Dr if you're concerned tho

D

KAD

It's atypical for me, though. Ordinarily, I'm feeling pretty much normal by the end of the first week. I guess there's a first time for everything. I will definitely bring it up with my doctor.

GracieLou

Why not try and stop looking for ones that are a good fit for you or what you are looking for. I am not talking time wise, we all have to fit AA meetings into our real life schedule, I am talking about "contempt prior to investigation".

Contempt is defined as: The feeling or attitude of regarding someone or something as inferior, base, or worthless

I will use your own words here.

You may try keeping your mind just a little more open.

There were some meetings I went to that I felt out of place but I found that when I stuck around for awhile, they started to make sense and helped me a great deal.

Sometimes thinking I already know what is best for me is really disguised as what I am comfortable with. Try stepping out of the comfort zone. I have come to see that many of the things I have learned and experienced, I never would have if I had not gotten out of the box.

It is almost as if I walked out of the jail cell that alcohol had put me in and I walked smack dab into another cell. I was to afraid to set down the bottle, but I did and wonderful things started to happen. Why was I so afraid to step out of my comfort zone box? I don't know but when I did, wonderful things started to happen.

Dee74

Every one of my withdrawals and mini recoveries was different and usually a little bit worse, especially as the years of drinking piled up...

but like I say - if you're concerned seeing your Dr could help put
your mind at ease


D

anattaboy

GMO, I was just thinking about you. Glad you found a counselor that fits. Welcome back.

RecklessEric

You're doing a great job.
Strange feelings are all part of withdrawal and anxiety can manifest itself in lots of different ways.
But check it with the doc even just to put your mind at ease.

Aellyce

Hey there. Just thought of you and decided to check in... Hope you are feeling more at ease today. It's great that you are exploring the AA groups now and thinking about it more seriously. I agree with GracieLou that perhaps keep your mind a little more open and don't decide about the groups too soon, especially without getting involved and participate actively. I never had much experience with AA, but I did with SR... I came here and posted spuriously in 2011 and in 2012, with long breaks. Definitely did not get the "hang of it" back then. Then I came back this January with a strong determination and commitment, and I threw myself into the SR universe and used the heck out of it, in different ways. It had made all the difference for me to really get involved, instead of mainly studying it from a distance. In ways that I could not imagine before actually experiencing it. I believe and hear all the time, with face-to-face support groups like AA is even more like that. We experience healing via active participation, both via seeking help and offering it. We make connections with others and we no longer feel alone and isolated.

On the other issues you brought up, such as impatience and foggy brain. I suggest that you re-read some of your old threads. You posted about very similar issues before. They are all perfectly normal in early sobriety, but do check in with your doc if it's too weird or you have any concerns. You also mentioned taking new meds - could these weird symptoms be due to those?

Hang in there, my friend, and please use all the resources that are available for you.