dox

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"Four key words can help lift depression and immediately improve your mood. These are acceptance, forgiveness, gratitude and hope."

~ Dr Liz Miller, Mood Mapping: Plot your way to emotional health and happiness


Honestly, I cannot add to this now, except to agree.

zjw

yep depression for me is like alcohlism. Or my tendancy to gain weight if i dont eat right. Or my issue quitting smoking after I've lit up that first one. Somethings I'm not good at and I have to work at. Other things come naturally to me. Somethings i make it look easy and people get mad at me for that.

Maybe one day some of this will no longer be obstacles maybe one day I'll be able to avoid something like depression with little to no effort maybe one day it'll come naturally. But for not it doesnt for now I do have to keep my focus in the proper places and watch my steps sometimes.

BackToSquareOne

Thank's again everyone for the great responses! In my earlier years of drinking I don't think I saw the anxiety, depression, lack of joy, empty feelings etc. etc. as real problems. I now see that depression is such a tough problem to beat because it has many different degrees and ways of manifesting. I reasoned that everyone has down days and it would get better on its own. Mood altering substances gave me a quick lift so hey, what was the problem!

It was not until I gave up all mood altering substances for good that I saw with crystal clarity that these were much more than down days or lousy moods. I also could no longer blame all my problems on the drinking, I actually believed that once I quit drinking everything would be peaches and cream, roses and sunshine. For me it didn't work that way.

In retrospect I see that when you take away all the crutches the underlying problems can actually get worse, or maybe you just notice them more. The good news is there are many things you can do to deal with depression once alcohol is out of the picture. It was the constant rebound effects of alcohol that took the depression to a new level. The alcohol delivers a quick fix but that's always followed by an even worse rebound of the depression. It's like trying to put out a fire by dumping gasoline on it.

Again everyone, thanks for the great responses!

Leshar

Just wanted to thank you for your post. I identify so much with what you have said in this thread, and I've gleaned so much from the responses too. I'm going through a crippling depression at the moment, and I'm plagued with obsessive ruminations about what I consider to be all my mistakes, all my failures, it's very hard to cope with. I'm almost 16 months sober, and I thought my long hx of depression would sort itself out sans booze. I now realize I have some serious re adjustment to do.
Your truth has helped me a lot, thank you, you are very strong to cope.

Wastinglife

I have also been struggling in sobriety with ruminating and depression. Without the crutch booze gave me, I am forced to face all the embarrassing, shameful things that happened in the past when I was drunk. I can't seem to escape my thoughts and focusing on anything is tough without repressed memories coming out of no where.

It's comforting to know that others are also struggling with this because it reassures me that I am not just going crazy and that this is a part of recovery.

BackToSquareOne

What Boleo said about detachment in this thread does seem like one of the most powerful things we can do to deal with depression. The Buddhist teachings are loaded with talks on detachment, they see attachment as one of the biggest obstacles on the path to enlightment.

What I find is that thoughts just seem to happen on their own, the degree of control we have over our flow of thoughts is very highly debated. It would be great if we could just snap our fingers and detach from all of our distressing thoughts and feelings, it does not seem to work that way.

What we do with thoughts and feelings is the aspect we can control. I'm finding this to be a very ongoing process, using thought to control thought has a bit of a conundrum built into it, perhaps thats why its not easy.

Carbonized

Had an episode i few hours ago and it pretty much ruined the time until now. repeating thoughts, flashbacks, physical effects, etc. A strong desire to either shut the world out or suicide. Currently fantasising about what it would be like to let this life end and go back in time to an earlier age and live life the right way.

Boleo

Detachment does not remove current thoughts or emotions. But rather it influences future thoughts and emotions. It works like Karma and Dharma in that it is reciprocal action which returns good deeds and thoughts.

It not only nips many disturbances in the bud, so to speak, but also attracts spiritual prosperity like a magnet. Prosperity in the form of peace of mind. joy and sense of purpose. Never am I further away from thoughts of drinking than when I feel a sense of purpose.

zjw

I get it battling some of my own issues the past few days. I feel as tho im being pulled back into a pit. I feel like there is no way out of my problems. There might not be a way out at least immediatly anyhow. But like i stated before battleing this stuff seems to be a routine for me. I'll get ahead of this and feel good for a time then I might get sucker punched again.

I think its part of lifes ups and downs. I just feel like my downs really stink sometimes.

youbetcha

I like that saying "the only way out is through." That's been true for me, and I like to see things that come up for me as opportunities for growth. Healthy forms of getting out of my own way puts things in perspective too.

wanttosucceed

no one else has mentioned it so I will. If you are depressed ruminating on thoughts and unable to stop medication may WELL be able to help you. Some of these conditions are chemical imbalances in our brains. In addition to other things it might be a miracle for you. It was for me. Talk to a good Psychiatrist.

Johno1967

Our brains are hard wired to do what we have accustomed it to do. I used to spend hours ruminating and depressed and despairing how I could ever stop. Alcohol obviously was a big part of that. Sobriety, working the 12 steps and mindfulness has me living more in the now and less ruminating about the past or worrying about the future. I focus on the present, I meditate and look for things to be grateful for. Turns out I didn't have to get down about bring depressed, all this recovery just sort of took care of it. My brain is now hard wired to recovery.

Hawks

Steps 4&5 did a lot for me just recently.

Prior to that I was having all sorts of things crop up from as far back as age 5,6,7. (I'm 42)

It was explained to me that it is virtually impossible to " think" my way out of bad feelings.

I have to say I agree with the person who told me that.... Although I didn't at the time.

GracieLou

"I was afraid to let go of what I had to try something new; there was a certain sense of security in the familiar."

I found this to be true. I did not want to let go of the anger, the hate, the sadness or the self pity. They were so much a part of my thinking that to let them go felt like I would be letting go of myself.

The truth was, once I let go, I found myself and she was not all that bad to look at. The people around me also improved when my perception of them and life in general was seen differently.