zjw

i didnt tell anyone. my wife new that was about it. I never was in that awkward position where i had to explain myself so it wasnt too hard. I also dont want to feel like someone else his holding me accountable to me that line of thought seems to work out better for those that like to hold others accountable. I also have authority issues and would probably get pretty ticked off if i felt someone was looking over my shoulder checking up on me etc.. I also didnt want to wear it on my sleeve and advertise it to the world. I didnt need people looking down on me etc.. I did a good enough job of that all by myself. I new I had to be accountable to me and everyone elses view point more then likely was not going to do me any good. I know too many people who cant wait to watch me fall so I felt better just keeping it to myself. In time as i felt more confident and comfortable i let out to some folks what was / has been going on.

I know some people like to tell others etc.. for various reasons. i always figure that'll just set me up for failure or i wont take it seriously thats just how I am.

dox

I didn't tell everyone: only close friends and relatives. And not when I had decided to stop drinking, but when I had stopped.

I don't make excuses, so more people now know that I don't drink; work colleagues, etc.
However, nobody has ever asked, "Why?".
Probably tell them if they did.
I try to be as honest as I can these days and excuses seem like white lies to me.

I have heard old-timers suggest that, when asked why you don't drink you could say: "It makes me ill."
Ain't it the truth?

At the end of the day: If people find out that I am an alcoholic, there may be a good reason for them to know.

FeenixxRising

I didn't send out a memo to friends and family, but I told a few close friends and family. If I'm offered a drink, I do say "no thanks, I've quit drinking" without going into any details.

I try not to make a big deal about it.

PurpleKnight

There were no grand announcements, I basically said "I'm not drinking today, I'll have a water" and for those that didn't know me "I don't drink, I'll have a water".

Eventually the people I knew, family/friends etc started to flag up that I never seemed to drink anymore, and that was fine, some went by the wayside for giving me grief and others stood by my decision.

Sobriety is tough enough in the beginning without drawing unnecessary attention to the situation, I took it as it came and kept it simple!!

I still don't use the word alcoholic etc, I'm simply now a "non drinker" like so many other people in the world, I just don't get into the reasons as to why with anyone other than those who would understand!!

Sasha4

I started off saying that I wanted to stop for a month.
Then I extended it to a year.
If people asked why, I would just say I wanted more out of life than waiting for 8pm to come and have a drink or I always wanted to stop for a year.

I never told anyone the real truth.
I see it as my battle to fight in the way I see fit.
I want to do it quietly and in my own way and only share with people here and in other recovery groups.

Now I'm over 2 years, most people don't ask anymore.
A few months ago, someone remarked 'I can't remember the last time I saw you with a drink" and that was that.

This fits my life though.
I am a mum on my own with a 4 year old.
Most of my friends are mums.
I don't have a rip roaring social life with tons of requests to go out.
It works for me.

MattyBoy

I have told people I've quit and in some cases I felt cornered in to revealing more than I initially wanted to to people about my past drinking habits but in a way I'm now glad I did. One of my coworkers invited me out for a drink and I went to be social but when I ordered a diet coke she looked confused and disappointed. She probed - not in a nasty way but in a way that showed she was confused why a young buck like me wouldn't want to pound a few beers - so I ended up confiding in her that I used to have a small problem with it. I didn't spill all the glory details but I didn't have to. She now says she has a new found respect for me as a person and I feel so glad I told her.


Don't know why I shared that, but I guess what I'm trying to say is that going public won't always mean people will think less of you or judge you negatively - people may actually surprise you with their reactions in a good way

MiniBK

Well done!!

NoJimmy

I told family and close friends. I have no plans to ever disclose any of this to people I know casually or professionally.

AliceTW

I tell people I don't drink, and when they ask why I just tell them I decided to take a year off for my health and then I found I was no longer interested in it.

Not a whole truth, barely a part-truth, but it works and doesn't make people feel like they need to justify their own decision to keep drinking.

I have told a couple of my friends, and I think a couple others suspect the truth. My partner knows, my immediate family know. I'd NEVER tell my dad's side of the family, such nasty gossipers haha!

DoubleBarrel

I can't eat shrimp. I'm allergic to it. Never feel the need to tell people about it, unless they are offering me shrimp.


No one cares. Really. No one. Except maybe drinking buddies.

If someone offers me a beverage, I say no thank you, or I take a water or soda. No big deal. It is literally no issue at all.

BlissWithin

some friends know and I talk about with the people at the gym when they're talking about booze, but like some said before most people dont care if you drink or not

FT

I forget.

It was 23 years ago. Over the intervening years, I have rarely felt the need to proclaim my non-drinker status. I don't care who is drinking around me, and they don't care what I am drinking or not drinking either.

After awhile, it really is NO BIG DEAL.

luvmygirls

I've wondered about this too; these are really interesting responses. I'm only on Day 3 and haven't even told my husband yet.

leah333

My opinion is that when you tell people you've quit drinking, it automatically implies that you had a real problem to start with. For people (especially family) who may not know this about you it can create a great deal of worry for them. Generally speaking, I say only tell your spouse

Aellyce

I told SR, my therapist, my (now ex) girlfriend, and people in AA. No one else. Never made excuses either, luckily I had not been in situation where I would have deemed excuses or justifications necessary. I just say "no thanks" or "thanks, I don't drink". Was never asked why. Some people get surprised a little, but that's about it. I was a lone drinker during the past several years so don't even have drinking buddies anymore. Cut ties with older ones long ago.

I see no reason to tell more people about my sobriety although I admit I did get into some dilemmas on potentially coming out about it in some work-related contexts because I work on addiction and have actually gotten involved in some outreach to the public to educate young people and adults about how addiction works. I was tempted sometimes that maybe it would be more convincing if I revealed that I was in recovery myself? But I soon realized it would be a bad idea and would likely to have the opposite effect.

I am not planning to tell anyone else except if it's necessary for some health-related issue or if I get into a new personal relationship where I see significance for it.