Sublety
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
Sublety
hey, wanted your guys thoughts on this:
recently ive been kind of "getting off" on the subtleties of life in general. through the act of not using, things still seem to jump out at me. these things are often details of my physical surroundings-visual/auditory/olfactory. also I notice taste and pick up more details in music and conversation.
I do have the bias of amateur research into Zen theory and practice, but there is a obvious link to the removal of my chemicals. the habits that led me to trouble were those that dulled, especially alcohol. it feels like I delved into the obvious by chasing these dragons and denied myself full experience as a result.
I see my attention to the subtlety of life as an extension of gratitude, so positive and healthy, probably. I mean, why be here if we aren't going to pay attention a little bit, right?
I guess my questions to the community would be, Is this temporary (im at 6months)? are many substance abuse leaning folks a little hyperaware to begin with (maybe contributing to urge to use)? If temporary, is this worth any practice to continue, or just mental masturbation?
recently ive been kind of "getting off" on the subtleties of life in general. through the act of not using, things still seem to jump out at me. these things are often details of my physical surroundings-visual/auditory/olfactory. also I notice taste and pick up more details in music and conversation.
I do have the bias of amateur research into Zen theory and practice, but there is a obvious link to the removal of my chemicals. the habits that led me to trouble were those that dulled, especially alcohol. it feels like I delved into the obvious by chasing these dragons and denied myself full experience as a result.
I see my attention to the subtlety of life as an extension of gratitude, so positive and healthy, probably. I mean, why be here if we aren't going to pay attention a little bit, right?
I guess my questions to the community would be, Is this temporary (im at 6months)? are many substance abuse leaning folks a little hyperaware to begin with (maybe contributing to urge to use)? If temporary, is this worth any practice to continue, or just mental masturbation?
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,350
I had something similar happen to me. I think I had been living with alcohol induced anhedonia. After a sufficient amount of time clean my brain went back to normal. It felt kind of like going from a 2d world to a 3d world. It is not temporary.
I see you are at 6 months. Mine started right around 9 months.
I see you are at 6 months. Mine started right around 9 months.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
I felt the same feeling of awe and appreciation, and some regrets that this was what I had been denying myself while addicted. I think you will have the opportunity to take this new awareness and appreciation of your addiction-free life with you now and incorporate that into your new persona. I believe it is most definitely sustainable. This will take some tending and attention to achieve this, but, when you think about it, isn't this what life is for?
Onward!
Onward!
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