Back to day three :(
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Oh f^k knows mostly transit.
Posts: 24
Back to day three :(
I've had enough of quitting - then getting into social situations, having a glass of wine and it all starting all over again. So here I am once more, but I'm not at rock bottom and I'm not finding God I'm just sick of drinking daily and I want to be free of it. Apparently I'm not an alcoholic, at least that's what my docs tell me, so why is it so darn hard? I so wish I could just never have the urge to drink again, I feel so useless... 
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
I don't believe one has to be alcoholic to have urges to drink. I also don't think one has to be addicted to have urges either. I do think though, that if your failing or otherwise struggling to get your urges gone and done with, you may want to start taking a deeper and more informed look on how you somehow become satisfied on drinking and then dis-satisfied and so you quit. And then the cycle repeats.
The other thing is I don't believe you have to hit some kind of predefined proverbial rock bottom - you can arbitrarily choose your own bottom if you've a mind to do so, imo. As for God, that too is entirely a personal choice to make or not make, how ever you may want. Being a slave to faith beliefs is useless, and so free choice is paramount for spiritual success, imo.
We drank for effect. So how does alcohol work for you as too effect?
Sorry your feeling a bit useless. That can change!
I'm asking for food for thought, not really asking you to answer.
The other thing is I don't believe you have to hit some kind of predefined proverbial rock bottom - you can arbitrarily choose your own bottom if you've a mind to do so, imo. As for God, that too is entirely a personal choice to make or not make, how ever you may want. Being a slave to faith beliefs is useless, and so free choice is paramount for spiritual success, imo.
We drank for effect. So how does alcohol work for you as too effect?
Sorry your feeling a bit useless. That can change!
I'm asking for food for thought, not really asking you to answer.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Oh f^k knows mostly transit.
Posts: 24
Thank you..I've been in and out of therapy for several years specifically for this but even my therapist doesn't consider it to be an issue. It's a bit strange really. But I've drunk daily for years and I'm really not happy about it, I never have been. It makes me calm, warm and fuzzy and helps me sleep among other things. I hope I can stay quit this time. Thanks for your response.
Woe is Moo.
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Most therapist/doctor will not consider alcoholism to be issue unless you dying of liver failure and/or you specifically state to them THIS IS AN ISSUE! It seem like right now, you teeter on it. Let me tell you, if you even think you has problem, do you self BIG freaking favor and stop now and do whatever you needs to do to stop. Read around here other thread of those who DYING to stop and can't. (I has like, at least 3 of those.) If you current therapist not think drinking an issue, lose that person NOW, and get addiction specialty therapist.
You can has warm fuzzy for year and year after year with alcohol. Is when you eventual wake up to all these wasted year that you really gonna feel it. Good luck!
You can has warm fuzzy for year and year after year with alcohol. Is when you eventual wake up to all these wasted year that you really gonna feel it. Good luck!
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
You can't quit despite your desire to. Repeatedly. That's a problem. Call it whatever you want. I justified my drinking for years because I didn't think it was a problem. The hallmark of addiction.
Read up on AVRT. You might find it enlightening.
Read up on AVRT. You might find it enlightening.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
There is no test,or outline to determine if someone is an alcoholic. And another thing is ,most of us that are alcoholic aren't honest with someone asking us questions about our drinking habits. And we do it without realizing we are actually doing it.
If you want to quit and are finding it difficult,then you have a problem. I am afraid if you approach this as if you don't have a problem,you aren't going to get very far.
Roll up your sleeves and tackle it head on.
Fred
If you want to quit and are finding it difficult,then you have a problem. I am afraid if you approach this as if you don't have a problem,you aren't going to get very far.
Roll up your sleeves and tackle it head on.
Fred
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Sure, I remember the warm fuzzy alcohol promised and delivered, that is until it didn't. Drinking becomes a real hell when the warmness is gone and the drinking continues and even increases. More drunks. More blackouts. More damage done.
Things can always get worse with drinking as we know from our own experiences. Doctors are trained medically to treat medical conditions, and alcoholism is not as easy to treat medically speaking and its normal for doctors to wait until damage done is obvious before they declare drinking to be an immediate medical problem. I agree with Cow.
Alcohol really played havoc with my psyche well before it harmed me physically. I started age 12 and quit age 24. Not surprisingly physical tests showed nothing. Several years before quitting sitting in lockdown on suicide watch in a mental hospital drunk and high on LSD explained a lot for me, but for my doctors not so much did they consider me having a drinking / drug problem. They consider the illness of my mind (schizophrenia) the immediate and essential problem. It was entirely the other way around for me. Sure I saw I was mentally sick, but I saw my alcoholism as the essential problem. On release three days later I same day started up with booze and drugs of course. This was all back in the late 1970's. Things have changed a lot since then on how addiction is recognized and treated medically, and yet still there is a persistent measure of dis-connect between doctor and patient with drinking if already present mental illness is in play. The addiction has to be extreme to bring on specific medical treatment. Its still easy for the drinker to fall thru the cracks and receive treatment for whatever and not for alcoholism / addiction. In fact, this is not surprising since alcoholism if not self-diagnosed can only thereafter be identified symptomatically by objective observers. Much debate remains on the existence of alcoholism goes without saying since much depends on the veracity of personal experiences.
Alcoholism / addiction are best early detected by self-examination, imo.
Things can always get worse with drinking as we know from our own experiences. Doctors are trained medically to treat medical conditions, and alcoholism is not as easy to treat medically speaking and its normal for doctors to wait until damage done is obvious before they declare drinking to be an immediate medical problem. I agree with Cow.
Alcohol really played havoc with my psyche well before it harmed me physically. I started age 12 and quit age 24. Not surprisingly physical tests showed nothing. Several years before quitting sitting in lockdown on suicide watch in a mental hospital drunk and high on LSD explained a lot for me, but for my doctors not so much did they consider me having a drinking / drug problem. They consider the illness of my mind (schizophrenia) the immediate and essential problem. It was entirely the other way around for me. Sure I saw I was mentally sick, but I saw my alcoholism as the essential problem. On release three days later I same day started up with booze and drugs of course. This was all back in the late 1970's. Things have changed a lot since then on how addiction is recognized and treated medically, and yet still there is a persistent measure of dis-connect between doctor and patient with drinking if already present mental illness is in play. The addiction has to be extreme to bring on specific medical treatment. Its still easy for the drinker to fall thru the cracks and receive treatment for whatever and not for alcoholism / addiction. In fact, this is not surprising since alcoholism if not self-diagnosed can only thereafter be identified symptomatically by objective observers. Much debate remains on the existence of alcoholism goes without saying since much depends on the veracity of personal experiences.
Alcoholism / addiction are best early detected by self-examination, imo.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
From an AA pamphlet.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them as honestly as you can.
1. Do you lose time from work due to your drinking?
2. Is drinking making your home life unhappy?
3. Do you drink because you are shy with other people?
4. Is drinking affecting your reputation?
5. Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?
6. Have you gotten into financial difficulties as a result of your drinking?
7. Do you turn to lower companions and an inferior environment when drinking?
8. Does your drinking make you careless of your family's welfare?
9. Has your ambition decreased since drinking?
10. Do you crave a drink at a definite time daily?
11. Do you want a drink the next morning?
12. Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
13. Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?
14. Is drinking jeopardizing your job or business?
15. Do you drink to escape from worries or troubles?
16. Do you drink alone?
17. Have you ever had a complete loss of memory as a result of your drinking?
18. Has your physician ever treated you for drinking?
19. Do you drink to build up your self-confidence?
20. Have you ever been in a hospital or institution on account of drinking?
If you have answered YES to any one of the questions, there is a definite warning that you may be an alcoholic.
If you have answered YES to any two, the chances are that you are an alcoholic.
If you have answered YES to three or more, you are definitely an alcoholic.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer them as honestly as you can.
1. Do you lose time from work due to your drinking?
2. Is drinking making your home life unhappy?
3. Do you drink because you are shy with other people?
4. Is drinking affecting your reputation?
5. Have you ever felt remorse after drinking?
6. Have you gotten into financial difficulties as a result of your drinking?
7. Do you turn to lower companions and an inferior environment when drinking?
8. Does your drinking make you careless of your family's welfare?
9. Has your ambition decreased since drinking?
10. Do you crave a drink at a definite time daily?
11. Do you want a drink the next morning?
12. Does drinking cause you to have difficulty in sleeping?
13. Has your efficiency decreased since drinking?
14. Is drinking jeopardizing your job or business?
15. Do you drink to escape from worries or troubles?
16. Do you drink alone?
17. Have you ever had a complete loss of memory as a result of your drinking?
18. Has your physician ever treated you for drinking?
19. Do you drink to build up your self-confidence?
20. Have you ever been in a hospital or institution on account of drinking?
If you have answered YES to any one of the questions, there is a definite warning that you may be an alcoholic.
If you have answered YES to any two, the chances are that you are an alcoholic.
If you have answered YES to three or more, you are definitely an alcoholic.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Oh f^k knows mostly transit.
Posts: 24
Thank you for the responses. Well I'm a week in and yes I'm pretty sure that it's an addiction (The AA brochures seem to indicate that), I guess there's a difference to being alcohol addicted and to being alcoholic. Or perhaps it's a spectrum with some people more effected by the disease than others. The days are okay my concentration is getting better but my drink time is evening and I'm pretty much ripping my hair out each night. I know I can't just have one or two like other people can.
I've been a bit jittery and have wicked tummy aches (as usual) but my appetite is up and I'm managing to get some sport in not much because my muscles seem tired but enough to feel a little empowered. I'm just so sick of doing this then telling myself I wasn't an alcoholic and falling off the wagon back to literally years of daily drinking.
I really want this to work, I want my life back, I'm sick of drink and it's endless hold on me.
Oh well, on a brighter note I'm very happy that I've got this far and that I've been sober for a WHOLE WEEK! A major accomplishment for me at this point.
I've been a bit jittery and have wicked tummy aches (as usual) but my appetite is up and I'm managing to get some sport in not much because my muscles seem tired but enough to feel a little empowered. I'm just so sick of doing this then telling myself I wasn't an alcoholic and falling off the wagon back to literally years of daily drinking.
I really want this to work, I want my life back, I'm sick of drink and it's endless hold on me.
Oh well, on a brighter note I'm very happy that I've got this far and that I've been sober for a WHOLE WEEK! A major accomplishment for me at this point.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Sydney Australia
Posts: 4,225
Welcome back, Friends.
It's natural to struggle to admit we have a problem with alcohol. Does it feel easier to say you are alcohol addicted rather than an alcoholic? Simply forget the words and labels....do you have a problem with drinking?
You've said previously you struggle to admit it to yourself and your Doctor the extent of the problem.
Please don't forget....we have all lied to ourselves at some point....you kinda can't fool us!
You are on a forum that promotes sobriety....please stay, open up and you'll find lots of resources and support here to help you stop.
Be well.
It's natural to struggle to admit we have a problem with alcohol. Does it feel easier to say you are alcohol addicted rather than an alcoholic? Simply forget the words and labels....do you have a problem with drinking?
You've said previously you struggle to admit it to yourself and your Doctor the extent of the problem.
Originally Posted by Friends 
Hi, I'm new and I know it's not the most serious of problems but it had me looking for support. I quit drinking, pot and cigs just four days ago after many, many years of daily abuse (in secret). Now I have the most ridiculously painful and noisy gastro issues. I'm pretty sure it's from the drink cos it's always been one of my excuses for drinking, 'it settles my tummy'.
Originally Posted by Friends
Think as for the replies, I know it's from the quit so I don't want to tell my Doc. I can't admit to anyone how much or often I drank, it's silly really but I just can't. I bet there are lots of people like me, who hardly admit it to themselves, never mind somebody else including/especially a doctor.
You are on a forum that promotes sobriety....please stay, open up and you'll find lots of resources and support here to help you stop.
Be well.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: fort worth tx
Posts: 1,373
Hey friends I read a quote early on in my sobriety that helped keep me in check..."total abstinence is easier to maintain than perfect moderation"...really it is. Just give it up. Quit fighting it. Alcohol does not agree with your body. Move on with life. You will be happier.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 94
Originally Posted by waynetheking
Hey friends I read a quote early on in my sobriety that helped keep me in check..."total abstinence is easier to maintain than perfect moderation"...really it is. Just give it up. Quit fighting it. Alcohol does not agree with your body. Move on with life. You will be happier.
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