Day 15
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 41
Day 15
Hello everyone.
Just checking in. Its been 15 days straight since I have stopped. I am feeling good. There have been cravings here and there, but I have sent them packing each time. I know that there is no "just one". I will have the same craving tomorrow, perhaps even greater because I caved today. Therefore it is not happening. I have even come to the point, that even if I get a craving I think about it and it becomes distasteful to me. I never want to go back to that slavery, depression, fear of serious health problems, hiding, embarrasment, wondering if people suspect anything, comments about my red face etc etc etc. I think that the cravings are on fading away in frequency and strength. Good riddens!
Was looking for a tool this past week in my garage and basement. Found 12 empty beer cans scattered around, actually hidden behind boxes or tucked behind obstructions, even found 3 in the snowblower. I just kept shaking my head everytime I found another empty can. What insanity. A 48 year old man, professional, graduate school educated and hiding empty beer cans around his house because he was so embarrassed and did not want to be found out.
Just checking in. Its been 15 days straight since I have stopped. I am feeling good. There have been cravings here and there, but I have sent them packing each time. I know that there is no "just one". I will have the same craving tomorrow, perhaps even greater because I caved today. Therefore it is not happening. I have even come to the point, that even if I get a craving I think about it and it becomes distasteful to me. I never want to go back to that slavery, depression, fear of serious health problems, hiding, embarrasment, wondering if people suspect anything, comments about my red face etc etc etc. I think that the cravings are on fading away in frequency and strength. Good riddens!
Was looking for a tool this past week in my garage and basement. Found 12 empty beer cans scattered around, actually hidden behind boxes or tucked behind obstructions, even found 3 in the snowblower. I just kept shaking my head everytime I found another empty can. What insanity. A 48 year old man, professional, graduate school educated and hiding empty beer cans around his house because he was so embarrassed and did not want to be found out.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
That's great you have 15 days WD...And you are fighting the cravings...Just curious if you are working any program or plan to assist you on your sober journey...There are different methods discussed at length on this site..Might be good to look into..
I don't want to go back to that life either - you described it perfectly!Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: California
Posts: 499
I found a half drank bottle of vodka in the closet. I asked my boyfriend what it was. He told me he had hid it one day to keep me from drinking it and I was already so wasted I hadn't noticed at the time.
Baby Girl D
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: x..Manchester, England..x
Posts: 592
Originally Posted by Workingdrunk 
Hello everyone.
Just checking in. Its been 15 days straight since I have stopped. I am feeling good. There have been cravings here and there, but I have sent them packing each time. I know that there is no "just one". I will have the same craving tomorrow, perhaps even greater because I caved today. Therefore it is not happening. I have even come to the point, that even if I get a craving I think about it and it becomes distasteful to me. I never want to go back to that slavery, depression, fear of serious health problems, hiding, embarrasment, wondering if people suspect anything, comments about my red face etc etc etc. I think that the cravings are on fading away in frequency and strength. Good riddens!
Was looking for a tool this past week in my garage and basement. Found 12 empty beer cans scattered around, actually hidden behind boxes or tucked behind obstructions, even found 3 in the snowblower. I just kept shaking my head everytime I found another empty can. What insanity. A 48 year old man, professional, graduate school educated and hiding empty beer cans around his house because he was so embarrassed and did not want to be found out.
Just checking in. Its been 15 days straight since I have stopped. I am feeling good. There have been cravings here and there, but I have sent them packing each time. I know that there is no "just one". I will have the same craving tomorrow, perhaps even greater because I caved today. Therefore it is not happening. I have even come to the point, that even if I get a craving I think about it and it becomes distasteful to me. I never want to go back to that slavery, depression, fear of serious health problems, hiding, embarrasment, wondering if people suspect anything, comments about my red face etc etc etc. I think that the cravings are on fading away in frequency and strength. Good riddens!
Was looking for a tool this past week in my garage and basement. Found 12 empty beer cans scattered around, actually hidden behind boxes or tucked behind obstructions, even found 3 in the snowblower. I just kept shaking my head everytime I found another empty can. What insanity. A 48 year old man, professional, graduate school educated and hiding empty beer cans around his house because he was so embarrassed and did not want to be found out.
Professional Drunk
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Toronto
Posts: 465
I hid a bunch of cans and bottles behind the furnace in the basement. Well, of course I forgot about them until it needed repairs and the service guys pulled them out with my GF and I standing there. The guy chuckled and said "Somebody's got a drinking problem!"......the shame.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 41
Originally Posted by Sapling
That's great you have 15 days WD...And you are fighting the cravings...Just curious if you are working any program or plan to assist you on your sober journey...There are different methods discussed at length on this site..Might be good to look into..
I think that I can beat it on my own as I have accepted alcohol for the traitor and fraud that it is. I know that its effects on me will be to crave it so much that I will even try to pursuade myself into having just " a few more now and that's it" or "that I can now control it" etc etc. I have been there and have given in in the past. I know and accept that these are all lies to myself purpetuated by the dependancy and the need to fulfill it. I accept that it will not end at only "some today" I will be really angry and disappointed in myself the next day, and, of course the next day will be the same craving all over again and the same promises of "only one more time". If I could control it while consuming it in moderation or less, I would not be here writing this. I do not want to be there or go back there ever again.
My attitude: "Sorry alcohol, your time is up. You have lied to me endlessly, harmed me and beat me up so much and done nothing for me except take lots and lots of my money. I still worry that you may have killed me. All of this under the disguise of making me think I felt good for what was really about 1 hour or less out of 24 every day. I have read on the Canadian Cancer Society Website or a similar website that the effects of alcohol on cancer last for 20 years after an individual stops drinking. I also notice a recent medical article suggesting the alcohol is a cancer risk for many more cancers that prevously thought even in the recent past. What a price to pay.
I realize who you are alcohol and accept it. I am not playing with you anymore. Get lost! Good bye!
Also I ask myself "why go out waste this money on alcohol and drink?" There is nothing in it for me, no gain, no advantage in drinking." Only serious harm and eventual death, no doubt. If I accede to the craving then I am being driven to drinking and controlled by the alcohol like some sort of puppet. I honestly do not want to drink, I hate it, I have hidden, I am embarassed by the thought of someone finding out or suspecting - so why do it. Who's controlling who?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 41
Originally Posted by Muunray
I found a half drank bottle of vodka in the closet. I asked my boyfriend what it was. He told me he had hid it one day to keep me from drinking it and I was already so wasted I hadn't noticed at the time.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 41
Originally Posted by Workingdrunk
I have also found half drunken cans of beer around. I alway's could not remember how I forgot about it. These were always hidden of course!
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