I drank yesterday....

[Flying Dutchman]

I don't even know why, all of a sudden it just seemed like a good idea.... a "normal" thing to do...

I bought 3 beers, I thought "I've been sober for 16 days now, a couple won't hurt" I finished them within an hour, and went to a bar where I had about 6 more and a couple of whiskies too....

woke up with an exquisite headache... couldn't even lie down, I paced around the house grunting in agony and going to the toilet every 5 minutes to puke, in the end I didn't even have anything to puke up so I was just retching...

I don't even know why.... I was gonna go to a meeting last night but didn't go... It pisses me off because I liked my sobriety date as well 09-02-06, it just "rang" well.... now it's 25-02-06.....


I feel like ****....

[Phinneas]

Well, FD, you did an experiment and didn't like the results, eh? The only good thing about it is that today is a new day.

What are you using for a program of recovery and support besides SR?

Hang in there and try again, ok?

[Little Missy]

That meeting would have been better, huh? Glad your back with us.

Drinking is a normal thing for us to do. That's why a program of recovery is so important. We have a lot of things to work on!!

[long timer]

The solution for me to prevent slips or relapse has been support and lots of it. Early on a clean and sober living environment was needed. If I think the drink through or the drug through. That can usually buy me enough time to pick up the 10,000 lb. phone. If your like me the most unatural thing to do is not drink and use. Everyday that WE stay clean and sober a MIRACLE has occured.



One Day At A Time

[Music]

Originally Posted by Flying Dutchman

I don't even know why, all of a sudden it just seemed like a good idea.... a "normal" thing to do...
woke up with an exquisite headache... couldn't even lie down, I paced around the house grunting in agony and going to the toilet every 5 minutes to puke, in the end I didn't even have anything to puke up so I was just retching...I feel like ****....

You drank because you decided to drink. If you don't know any better, what do you expect? And, I'm glad you feel like ****. When you get sick and tired of being sick and tired, maybe you'll look for help.

[In memory of miracle]

((( Flyingdutch )))
Here's to your new sobriety date!

[Sweet Thursday]

I myself have messed up pretty badly, so I can relate to that mentality of one or two drinks won't hurt. The trouble is, those one or two drinks never stop there. And when they don't stop there you have to be honest with yourself, because you can't drink like a "normal" drinker.

Here's to day one...for both of us. One foot in front of the other...one day at a time, okay?

Hang in there.

[Cap3]

Today is a new day..
Step One,
Keep on,keeping on

[CarolD]

ST & FD....never give up.

Get serious and get sober,

[CAPTAINZING2000]

mine is 9/3. All any of us have is today.


I live for this moment right now. As long as I keep doing what I'm doing on a daily basis, Everything will be alright. I don't drink, I put my faith in my higher Power, I keep my side of the street clean and help others

As soon as I make any change in that, my sobriety is in trouble. To drink is to die. My spirit was dead comine into AA. I never want to kill my spirit again

If, you learned from your slip, it wasn't a bad thing. Did you learn from it??

[Sugah]

Once more: The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink. Except in a few rare cases, neither he nor any other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from a Higher Power.
~Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 43

I don't know when my spiritual awakening happened. At sixteen days, I was still relying on mental defenses. The only reason I'm sober today is because I got a sponsor as soon as I could and began work on the steps immediately. Mental defenses don't keep us sober....if they did, we wouldn't need a Power greater than ourselves.

Do you have a sponsor? It doesn't sound like the drinking was much fun...otherwise, you'd probably still be doing it. I know I would. Ready to take the next step and start working on the spiritual foundation?

I'll keep you in my prayers!

Peace & Love,
Sugah

[bor_rabnud]

Hang in there and don't let it get you down too much. Be strong and pray alot for GOD to take the desire to drink away. That old spirit of addition can be defeated.

Rob

[skunkape]

You're closer than you've ever been before now that you've had this episode. Now you're sobriety Birthday and my real birthday are the same day, happy Birthday.

[2dayzmuse]

I don't even know why, all of a sudden it just seemed like a good idea.... a "normal" thing to do...

Alcoholism is cunning, powerful and baffling. Chock it up to the added proof that when it comes to drinking, for people like ourselves, there is no such thing as "normal". Consider it research in why we can not drink.

It is rather shocking after abstaining from alcohol for awhile, to indeed see how powerless we actually are in attempting to moderate our drinking. It is utter maddness. I failed at that experiment every time. Try, try, again...

[fraankie]

well, thanks for sharing
now i know what i'm in for
if i drink

but
it's about today
so
step up
do your best
and
don't drink and go to meetings
today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!


best
fraankie

[Wolfman]

Yesterday is out of reach. All you have is today. You woke up... that's positive. You weren't in jail. (hopefully) That warm fuzzy you got doesn't quite make up for the next day self loathing. SHAKE IT OFF. Renew your commitment to yourself and -your- higher power and get to a meeting and /or make contact with your sober friends. Stay strong and take action. Pick up that 10,000 lb telephone before picking up. It has worked for me when I have been close, and when in the past I didn't keep the promise to myself to"pick up the phone before you 'pick up' " I have slipped. Peace to you and keep on...

[fraankie]

start anew
there is a new life out there
waiting for you


fraannkie

[Wolfman]

Hey dutchman, how are you? Peace to you!

[jazpoppy]

Mostly I just read posts, don't usually reply to many lately. Mostly because I don't have any answers, I am seeking answers. But I see this post and I think to myself that this is me. This is me everyday. I wake up in the morning, tell myself today is going to be drug/alcohol free, and if I make it to 12pm I'm doing good! So when I fail, which I almost always do, I never stop to think that "maybe I should start going to some meetings, maybe get a sponsor, maybe use my telephone instead of my own weakened willpower." I really never thought I'd find any answers in a room full of drunks/junkies, but guess what??? Many, many people have become successfully sober by relying on who: "A big room full of SOBER drunks and junkies!" I think today after work, I am going to drive my sick head right over to a local AA meeting and get my medicine! This time I'll actually open up and swallow it, instead of spitting it out and telling everyone that it doesn't work!

So, FD, you may have pushed your sobriety date back a bit, but you can be proud that you influenced a hard-headed alkie/junkie like me take the plunge and go check out a meeting instead of checking out the beer and wine section at the local Kwik Mart! Thanks! I appreciate it, and I'll let you know what happens! That's a promise! I feel more encouraged by everyone here at SR, so thanks to EVERYONE!

Love

Jaz

[2dayzmuse]

I really never thought I'd find any answers in a room full of drunks/junkies, but guess what??? Many, many people have become successfully sober by relying on who: "A big room full of SOBER drunks and junkies!"

Just ask an expert. Right? There is nothing like going straight to the source and asking a drunk/junkie how they got sober. We share our ES&H and learn from those who have trudged the path before us. Just ask an expert. They will know the answer or at least know where to find it.

[Flying Dutchman]

Thanks all of you for reacting, I appreciate it. Feel so much better sober, it's truly amazing how we convince ourselves that we miss the feeling of being drunk.
Last time I drank I didn't even enjoy it either... It was like it wasn't what it used to be (which ofcourse it isn't because I've gone wayyy beyond that point already years ago...) I was like: "ok I've finished my beer now, still no notable buzz, let's try some whisky"
I got blind drunk on it but didn't get that "rosy glow" at all... instead I became clumsy and annoyed that that my thinking was impaired... "but maybe another drink will help put me in the mood.."

VICIOUS circle

keep away from those "nostalgic" thoughts, they're pure deception...

Originally Posted by jazpoppy

So, FD, you may have pushed your sobriety date back a bit, but you can be proud that you influenced a hard-headed alkie/junkie like me take the plunge and go check out a meeting instead of checking out the beer and wine section at the local Kwik Mart! Thanks! I appreciate it, and I'll let you know what happens! That's a promise!

Thanks Jaz, Let me know!

[Flying Dutchman]

Originally Posted by skunkape

You're closer than you've ever been before now that you've had this episode. Now you're sobriety Birthday and my real birthday are the same day, happy Birthday.

This one really cheered me up by the way, thanks!!

[jazpoppy]

I may not have a sobriety date yet, but I am moving in the right direction. I am admitting I am powerless over alcohol and drugs, and I am admitting that I do need help. Especially the help of others in the same position as me! I didn't make yesterday my sobriety date, but I am not going to beat myself up over it each day, like I used to, I am going to see each day as a clean slate that I can start with, and go from there. I keep reading SR threads, try to get to a few f2f meetings and go from there. If it gets too tough, I know there is rehab/detox available!


luv

jaz

[rose petals]

hay jazzpoppy
Are you drinking or drugs?just curious what are you afraid of coming off of? How much do you drink or use each day?--by the way i am laura,alkie--
laura

[fraankie]

well, don't drink today