Going to try AA

[Gideon]

During the day here on this board I found myself saying "definetly sounds familiar" many times as I read the posts. I could relate to peoples experiences and what they were going through and they were able to relate to aspects of my story.

If I take some earlier advice and concentrate on the similarities,

I should be able to go and at least listen to a AA meeting.

That will be my goal.

[chip]

Hi Gideon- If you can relate to people's experiences here, and you find similarites...you're at the right place. I find it's empowering. I'm thankful that folks like us don't have to be alone. AA is a whole bunch of people who share a common purpose: to stay sober, and bring the message to suffering alcoholics. I found that I really fit in there. I can relate to the folks at AA, just like I relate to people here on SR. I'd recommend it to anybody who wants to stop drinking.

It seems like you're on the path to AA.....go for it! I went to an open meeting first. It was great because I didn't have to talk, I just listened to the speaker. I could really, really relate to the speaker. I knew then and there I belonged in AA.
chip

[CarolD]

I admire your willingness to explore your options.

I did not speak for months in meetings!
Now I rattle on...on...on.

Blessings....

[Cathy31]

That's a wonderful idea and you will NOT regret it!!!! i promise you!!!

Well done!!! I found this website not even knowing that I was an alcoholic, then like you I related to so many people and thought a-ha now that's my problem! Then I tried AA - TERRIBLY nervous to walk in there, there was a whole thread on it here!!!

Eventually I got up the courage to go - I felt like I was home at last and I have met such special people and I am feel truly blessed to have found it.

I am SO glad that you are giving it a try!!!!!

Love
Cathy31
x

[livenletlive]

Good for you. It's a great fellowship and a safe place to look forward to each night. I wish you well in your meetings.

[Time2Surrender]

A very good goal Gideon.

[Gideon]

Got back from my first "real" meeting. Had tried it once before but that was under threat of death from my girlfriend. I was not there for the right reason and I was not serious about the whole thing. I went around the block a few times before getting the courage to enter, this is telling since I am on crutches. Timed my entrance to avoid pre-meeting small talk. However, it wasn't like a work function in that the smiles were not forced.

I was pleasantly surprised like I was with this forum. REALLY NICE BUNCH OF FOLKS. I followed through with my plan and the advice given here and just asked if I could sit and listen, everyone was cool with that. Again, alot of the words struck a chord with me, guess that is why it has been referred to here as a fellowship, a collection of people while different in there own way have been in similar situations. Someone who hasn't looked through the prism of addicted eyes cannot really know what it is like.

Truth be told the idea of surrrendering and changing everything is alot, but I am not going to dwell on that. Sitting in a room with strangers is enough to reflect on for now. No one seemed to want to force ideas down anyone's throat. I have read alot of threads here and I understand each meeting is unique, this is just my take from this particular meeting on this particular night, nothing more.

I am up for going again and will do so. One question, it seemed that a group response to someone worrying about the future was "don't project." A nice woman tried to explain it a bit to me afterwards. It basically boiled down to planning and not projecting. I must confess I did not fully understand despite the attempted explanation. Does anyone have a view?

Oh yeah, thanks for the replies and advice.

Regards,

PS livenletlive, cool avatar!

[Phinneas]

Originally Posted by Gideon

One question, it seemed that a group response to someone worrying about the future was "don't project." A nice woman tried to explain it a bit to me afterwards. It basically boiled down to planning and not projecting. I must confess I did not fully understand despite the attempted explanation. Does anyone have a view?

Congrats for going to a meeting. I hope you will go to many more to get the benefit of AA and the support of many good people.

For me, don't project has to do with "future tripping." I tend to worry and think about the future - what will happen when? how will this situation turn out? what do I do if? and so on. The program teaches me to stay in today and to do the "next right thing." If I do this, the future takes care of itself.

[fraankie]

good for you
AA all the way


best
fraankie

[CarolD]

Way to go!

Here is my take on your question....my opinion only...

I plan to move. I do all the footwork. Then it falls thru.

I must trust that HP has a plan more to my benefit.
I keep in focus and stay sober.

Looking back...very few things in my life have had an expected outcome. Good or bad.

That's where my faith comes in.

Blessings....

[jlo34]

Gideon,
Good deal on going to your first meeting. Please continue to give AA a try. The more you go; the easier it gets, the more you like it - and the people...they're just like family when you get to know them.

As for don't project - all we have is today. We don't even know if we're going to be alive tomorrow...so it is ok to have plans - just don't plan the outcome (expectations). Hopefully that's a little clearer.

Great job - keep it up.
Jen

[chip]

Good stuff, Gideon! Keep coming back.
chip

[Time2Surrender]

I love reading threads like this.

[Chy]

Good for you Gideon!

[Gideon]

I want 90 posts from me in here. I've been to three different meetings and all have been great. I come away with questions as well as comfort, but both make me want to go back for more. Glad I decided to go to AA, glad I decided to post on this site. Feel much better.

[CAPTAINZING2000]

I didn't know what to expect in AA. I found out, there were people I'd worked with, people I went to school with, and old drinking frineds.

I'd rather be in an AA meeting with the people in the meeting then, the people in a bar that could give a $hit one way or another about me.


There's someone in AA from every walk of life. I think of us as a better class of people

[utopia]

i went to my first aa meeting lately, im stunned at the similarities but that doesnt make me an alcoholic. i saw my dad in a lot of them and i felt fearful at first but then i felt spiritually connected to something big at the end of the meeting, i felt god. ive been to al-anon for families and friends of alcoholics and there are a lot of similarities between alcoholics and their friends and families. rather than take a drink for me is sometimes food, sometimes working until i collapse, controlling, people pleasing and i found a lot of alcoholics do that too and that a lot of non-alcos do too. the disesease is cunning, baffling and insidious. i feared going to aa was saying i was an alcoholic, saying i was an alcoholic made me feel i was my abusive father. i would say i was an alcoholic today if i ha an ONGOING drinkling problem (CAL Understanding alcoholism, Understanding Ourselves). maybe i am, maybe im a "dry drunk", maybe im 21. i continue to go because what i DO know is that alcohol is a problem in my life every now and again but that its not always when im drinking, and that i am one with alcoholics as with all humans and i am no better or worse than anyone, merely different in my level of awareness and understanding perhaps, i dont berate people for being spiritually younger than me just as i dont berate newborn babies for being unable to run. the main issues with the booze for me is its prescene during a lot of times whenive had sex but my confidence is growing. i dont have to be an alcoholic proclaimed, only to desire to stop drinking to go to aa (tradition 4 i think). im gaining awareness today and deciding.

ultimately if aa works for me i will work it rather than trying to see if this latest label fits and gives me a sense of identity, belonging and community. i will use my recovery tools to better myself so that i can become a clear channel for all the love, peace and understanding that the universe can muster within and through me.

[fraankie]

good goal
go check out the meeting
you can leave
but
one thing in AA is
"you are never alone"


best
fraankie

[fraankie]

so how's it going?

[utopia]

i tried my second meeting today. felt that theres this pattern. i feel unsafe and fearful at first, almost swearing the essence of my alco father is in the room. then i feel sick, nauseous and like a snake is coiled around my inner core, hissing but slowly being taken out, it feels like its well stuck in there. im doubtful, i remember times ive drunk alchol responsibly, i cant remember too many times i didnt end up feeling sad and needy after. i def am connecting with something in the aa room i dont get in other fellowships, feel a bit blown away but not far enough to stop coming back. undersatnd what a dry drunk is but come to find it a negative term that seems to perpetuate the "us and them" idiom that i find breeds hostility. being guided by god a lot on this one. still deciding.

[fraankie]

i feel unsafe and fearful at first, almost swearing the essence of my alco father is in the room. then i feel sick, nauseous and like a snake is coiled around my inner core, hissing but slowly being taken out, it feels like its well stuck in there. im doubtful,

whether you go to AA or not
you got to get away from this stuff
live in the now
you are a big boy
your dad is not there
just act "as if"
as if it's a great day
as if you are strong and not feaful
as if it's a AA meeting
etc
best
fraankie