Accept.

[Dan]

Alcoholics usually have trouble accepting ordinary setbacks and limitations that other people live with all the time. Sometimes it seems much easier to just get drunk than to accept boredom and frustration.
The irony of such behavior is that we then have to accept much more failure as a result of problems created by drinking. Our drinking brings far more pain than it removes.
Learning acceptance in sobriety is part of the growing-up process. Along with learning to accept things we cannot change, however, we learn there are some things we don't have to accept. Living sober gives us the power and confidence to make such changes.

I'll repeat the Serenity Prayer today if I begin to feel disturbed or threatened. I will face life realistically while knowing I have many opportunities for growth and change.

From the book Walk in Dry Places.

[Time2Surrender]

.........The courage to change the things I can.And the wisdom to know the difference.

[spirit]

i am with you dan, day two for me and trying, very trying, haha

nice to see you - thanks for the reminder
hugs
kath

[Millwallj]

IF I dont drink, I learn. If I dont accept something then I am uncomftable and learning takes a little longer.

It is the law of the mind that if I dont "fix" then I will learn.

Nice post.

[findingout]

I'll repeat the Serenity Prayer today if I begin to feel disturbed or threatened. I will face life realistically while knowing I have many opportunities for growth and change.

This, in my experience, actually works. Such a simple, uncomplicated, inexpensive, easy to remember, no electricity or internet connection required aid to getting by day to day. It just seems so last century. All it requires is the belief, or the willingness to entertain the belief, that it is something that might actually be worth doing. And of course, actually doing it.

One Love, One Heart,
Tony

[findinganewme]

Tony ..... you seem to always shed some HOPE in all of us who need it SO!!!!!!!!!!!

Much love,
Maria

PS: Amazing what SIMPLISTIC BEAUTY can do for the soul!

[jdcm1965]

Change is inevitable, pain is optional.

Johnnyboy

[hopealwayz]

That was just what I needed to hear today...those words rang so true.

[lulu70]

For me, acceptance is the key to everything--sobriety, happiness, serenity.....unfortunately, I sometimes don't even realize I am having trouble accepting something until it bites me in the a$$. What is it they say? When the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of change--only then will I be able to do something. Other people say it better than I do, but I think you get the idea!!!!

Hugs to all--

[Wilky]

The necessary change ("This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.")
comes from "the result" of working the steps. Simple program, seek God and clean up the wreckage of the past!

Wilky

[livenletlive]

Dan, I needed to read what you wrote. My professional life is non-existent at the moment. I understand it is due to me having too many ****-it days. Those ****-it days (drunk) days limit and set me back to back to square one.

And boredom takes me out. I am glad the have this community to help curb the boredom. Thanks.

[Dan]

Gotta tackle the boredom Rob.
Somehow, we find new hobbies and activities.
You know, now that I think of it, what I thought was boredom at first might just have been grieving the bottle.
One more reason to get our asses out the door and do something.
Nice avatar man

[Wilky]

Originally Posted by DangerousDan

Gotta tackle the boredom Rob.
Somehow, we find new hobbies and activities.
You know, now that I think of it, what I thought was boredom at first might just have been grieving the bottle.
One more reason to get our asses out the door and do something.
Nice avatar man

What I did was STUDY the BB, and the 12X12. Go to as many meetings as possible. If you are single....you can serve God more than a married man....such as myself! I was doing 3 meetings a day when I first entered AA. Now, of course, I am recovered. I am so busy in, and out, of AA it is almost unbelieveable. No time for boredom!

Wilky

[jlo34]

Acceptance. I never did like this word. I generally fight acceptance tooth and nail.

The Big Book states that:

"...When I stopped living in the problem and began living in the answer, the problem went away. From that moment on, I have not had a single compulsion to drink.

And acceptance is the answer to ALL my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is suppose to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and to my attitude.

Shakespeare said, "All the world's a stage, all the men and women merely players." He forgot to mention that I was the chief critic. I was always able to see the flaw in every person, every situation. And I was always glad to point it out, because I knew you wanted perfection, just as I did. A.A. and acceptance have taught me that there is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us; that we are all children of God and we each have a right to be here. When I complain about me or about you, I am complaining about God's handiwork. I am saying that I know better than God.

For years, I was sure the worst thing that could happen to a nice guy like me would be that I would turn out to be an alcoholic. Today, I find it's the best thing that has ever happened to me. This proves I don't know what's good for me. And if I don't know what's good for me, then I don't know what's good or bad for you or for anyone. So I'm better off if I don't give advice, don't figure I know what's best, and just accept life on life's terms, as it is today - especially my own life, as it actually is. Before A.A., I judged myself by my intentions, while the world was judging me by my actions." pages 449-450 Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) 3rd edition (Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict).

If I didn't know better, I would have sworn that I had written that or the author was writing about me. I love being the chief critic...usually with the need to accept a situation is anger (justified or not). I tend to justify the anger to make it seem like it's not within my power....however, justified I guess seems to make me think that I've been wronged unjustly and I don't need to accept it. I know that in order to find peace and serenity - I need to accept whatever comes into my life. I may not like it, but I NEED to accept it.