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04-05-2005, 09:01 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Where am I now?????????  Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: still finding out...still looking
Posts: 9
| I'm In BIG S**t......................
This is my first post to this site and I need some feedback. I have been sober for 7yrs June 1st, But I'm going through something just a bit more scarier than my stopping the use of alcohol... I've just recently been diagnosed with what the Med pro's call an AVM in my brain and am waiting for surgery to remove it from my brain.......... And I'm scared as hell to be honest. An AVM is in their terms AterialVenousMalformation that was formed during conception of birth 3wks into growth in the womb....... What it boils donw to in layman terms ( me) is I have a 5cm Anurysm in the right side of my head and they have to go in an take it out, a 15hr surgery,not only do I have to go through that I've had test after test since they found it..... Now how it was found, I had just changed jobs and it was my first day on the new one, when at a 1/2hr before quiting time I slipped on a machine ( I'm a machinist) fallingto the concrete floor on my forehead..... Seeing stars and shaken up, my head within micro seconds started pounding. Thinking nothing of it because of all the stupid things I did under the influence, I went home. My Wife whom is an RN told me I should have it checked out but stubborn as I am I told her if it's not better in the next day or so I will
__________________ Your first instinct is ALWAYS right; it is your ego that keeps you from doing it......AA SPONSER |
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04-05-2005, 09:28 AM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Don't get undies in a bunch  Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,166
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and the concern is your fears? The steps hold your answer. Talk it over with God. He made us. He will know how to guide the Drs to fix you correctly. Know others who have had an Anurysm. It isn't as big a deal today as it was 20 years ago. Still is surgery all the same. Put it in God's hands. Walk this through the steps and find peace. He has kept you through all these years, He will see you through this as well.
__________________ * I asked God to spare me pain. God said "No", Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.  Recovery Related Acronym B. E. S. T. = Been Enjoying Sobriety Today? |
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04-05-2005, 09:41 AM
| #3 (permalink) |
| It is what it is!!!  Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Sobriety
Posts: 5,785
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Of course you are scared, that is a terrifying thing to go through and fear is normal. Yep, your HP has got you this far, he is not gonna drop you now. I have learned from different family members that there is a support group for just about everything out there. Ask at the hospital if they have referrals to people that have been through what you are going through, you know the whole fellowship thing works in all areas of our lives. Trust, faith.....these things will pull you through. Maybe the fall was your HP's way of bringing this out in the open so that it could be taken care of. Blessings to you and your family. Stick close to your program right now. And welcome to SR!
__________________  I know more about how to live than I did yesterday, but not as much as I'll know tomorrow. Today, Ill learn something new~JFT, 1/27/06 The difference between a good day and a bad day, is about 2 days~Ann of SR |
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04-05-2005, 10:32 AM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Psalm 118:24  |
Welcome To The Site, Nice To Have Someone As Youg As You On This Site With Your Sobriety. You Can Be A Real Positive Role Model For The Younger Posters On Here. I Do Hope, Your Spill Is Nothing To Worry About. Nice To Have You On Board Chris
__________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU  WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6 |
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04-05-2005, 10:42 AM
| #5 (permalink) | |
| Member  Join Date: May 2003 Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,867
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04-05-2005, 01:17 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Grateful recovering alcoholic  Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Blissfield, MI
Posts: 814
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Dear Out of the Fog, God has a funny way of revealing things to us in strange ways. As others have said: work on step 3... I know, I know, easier said than done. Pray about it and just keep praying. Nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Welcome to SR and keep praying and believing and having faith. Jen |
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04-08-2005, 12:49 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Where am I now????????? Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: still finding out...still looking
Posts: 9
| I'm in big S**T Well I'm back to finish my little story on how I found the AVM in my head, after I told my Wife I would have it looked at in the next day or so............. It only took me the next day when at work (my second day of new job) my head felt like it was going to pound off my shoulders that I told myself, When I get home I'll feel better, during work that day I took ??? ibpro's, and it still hurt. when I got home that evening, all I could do is sit and relax, or so I tried. By the next morning my Wife was not going too let me be stubborn any more and told me that she was taking me to the Dr. Now being the kind of Doc. he is told us he wanted a CT done right now. After getting the results of the test he called my Wife (she's an RN) and told her " I think we've got a bigger problem than just a concusion, so he ordered an MRI !!!!!!!!!!!!!! the next day he was in awe of the size of the thing in my head. 5cm............... that is about 21/2" of twisted vessels on the right side of my head, and not only is it there It runs through feeder veins into my sagital sinius. Now that It is getting closer to surgery,( i've got only 3 more test to do) i'm getting just a bit more nervous about the whole thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And on top of all of that, my only bad habit I have (Smoking) was told to quit........... So my last smoke was today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now,what i'm getting at is I believe GOD would give me anything more than I could handle so what i've decided to do is not to over worry and let God lead the way, because in my opinion he knows all things and I surrender all my things to him in Prayer daily. I not only pray for myself but my Wife ( whom was diagnosed with M.S. 9yrs.ago) to give her the strength to get through all of this w/o wearing her down too. I worry about her more than myself I think at times because I really don't feel the AVM in my head, but I do still have headaches from the concussion. I really dont want her to get any worse cause of me! She is my love and my lifelong partner . I love her with every part of my being, and that is why I believe that God don't give us any more than we can handle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for letting me get this out and keep me and my Wife in your Prayers....................
__________________ Your first instinct is ALWAYS right; it is your ego that keeps you from doing it......AA SPONSER |
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04-08-2005, 01:27 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Basement
Posts: 724
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Hi Fog, Wow that's some story. You guys are definitely in my prayers. I find that amazing that you found out about this the way you do. God works in mysterious ways. Good luck with surgery and please keep us posted.
__________________ It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out – it's the grain of sand in your shoe. Robert Service |
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04-08-2005, 04:09 PM
| #12 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Sunny Californie
Posts: 125
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Hey Fog. sorry to hear God has handed you a big lump of s--t. Your wife too! I am certain that all things work for the glory, and good, of God. He is either going to perform a miracle through those doctors, or bring you home. Either way you are in His hands. Also, you mentioned God not giving us more than we can handle. Nope. Not true. God gives us WAY more than we can handle so we depend on Him with humility in recognition that He is and we aren't! May God guide the hands of the doctors when they perform His miracle on your brain...and may He fill your wife with His love and peace! Wilky |
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04-08-2005, 04:44 PM
| #13 (permalink) |
| 1000 Post Club  Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,298
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I have to disagree with Wilky on something...I dont think God gives us these maladies, I think its Life doing what Life does. God brings us thru whatever life deals us. Fog...you sound like you got what it takes to live thru this...A higher Power. Your not the first to go through a crisis like this, and wont be the last. Remember, your not alone. Perhaps you can find a support group for folks who have had aneurism's online. May help to identify with them? Good luck and be assured you have a lot of prayers going up for you and your wife. I can tell your a loving husband, it shows in your words about your wife  Peace  |
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04-09-2005, 09:08 AM
| #15 (permalink) |
| Where am I now????????? Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: still finding out...still looking
Posts: 9
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Thank you to all !! I feel that God showed me this through my fall at work so it can be taken care of, and I also feel that he would'nt give me anything that I wasn't able to pull through. With my Wife by my side and God guiding the hands of the doctors and watching over me I think that I will pull through with minor after affects................................... THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS and I will keep everyone informed, just by a small chance if I'm not able, My Wife will!!!!!!!! Fog...........................
__________________ Your first instinct is ALWAYS right; it is your ego that keeps you from doing it......AA SPONSER |
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04-09-2005, 09:51 AM
| #16 (permalink) |
| Don't get undies in a bunch Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,166
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Thank you for the update. Prayers will continue with each time you come to mind.
__________________ * I asked God to spare me pain. God said "No", Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me. Recovery Related Acronym B. E. S. T. = Been Enjoying Sobriety Today? |
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02-08-2008, 01:47 PM
| #17 (permalink) |
| Where am I now????????? Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: still finding out...still looking
Posts: 9
| I am Back and better than before.....after my AVM surgery
Hey guys...it has been awhile. I had my surgery on May 10, 2005. It ended up being a 39 hour surgery and I almost died on the table, my B/P was 33/0, My wife was on the phone all those hours with the nuerosurgeons, anethesiologists, etc, etc. I was told they used 2 operating rooms. I was told later after 9 months that I didn't remember anything and LUCKILY my wife is a nurse with a Master's degree. I would have been in big S**t if I would not have had her but then again, there is GOD. HE was there and I KNOW that for a fact, folks. I have a 10 inch scar from the front of my right temple to the right side of the back of my head.It is amazing, I am walking, typing, talking but I have a lot of problems with short term memory loss, I start a sentence and then cannot finish it...VERY small price to pay for MY life.....I am NOT complaining, I am so glad to be here on this board today, I am so glad to be celebrating my 10th birthday, (willing I stay sober) one last 2 years, the little things in life don't matter, people getting angry because you are not going fast enough, they are flipping you off, people that are just mad at the world and they don't even know why, I had a guy ask me the other day "Why are you breathing my air" I said "I wish you could know what I do, but you cannot, I am sorry you are so very angry but I am going to pray for you" He just walked away mumbling to himself-MADDER!!!! You cannot buy into other people's anger and their misery as I have found out that my "new" personality, and after a 39 hour brain surgery , you will have a life altering experience. You will learn how BLESSED not LUCKY you are. It has NOTHING to do with LUCK. I thank all of you who 2 years ago were there for me and I printed out all the responses I got from all of you, Chy, everyone, I cannot remember, but I took them with me to the hospital for good luck and what better people to take. Thank you and my wife is also very different as she had a FULL plate after the surgery dealing with me as I was very agitated for 9 months. I called her "Hey Lady!!!" She is one on a million...... May Your HP keep His hands on you as mine does on me daily, it will always get a little bit better, I HAVE to believe that, what is life without a dream? PEACE- Steve
__________________ Your first instinct is ALWAYS right; it is your ego that keeps you from doing it......AA SPONSER |
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02-08-2008, 01:54 PM
| #18 (permalink) |
| Don't get undies in a bunch Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,166
|
Steve Thank you for coming back and letting us know the good news.
__________________ * I asked God to spare me pain. God said "No", Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me. Recovery Related Acronym B. E. S. T. = Been Enjoying Sobriety Today? |
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02-08-2008, 08:33 PM
| #21 (permalink) |
| AWOL :)  |
Wow Steve! You are a walking miracle. Just to think you were that close to death, and the Lord saw you through. What a blessing. Your story inspired me. My late husband had an AVM in his brain but never had to have it removed. I am happy it all turned out for you. To God be the glory. What a dear wife you have! blessings to you both! Sheila |
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