aasharon90

I do my best thinking early early in the morning
and when out on the road sitting on my side
of the car, passenger, , listening to music on
the radio and looking out my side window.

We just got back from a short trip to the
store and I was thinking about how sad it
is that our law enforcement, officers, who
are here to enforce the laws and protect
our citizens are getting shot left and right.

Just so sad. Just last night while I'm safe
and sound in my bed, sleeping soundly, then
to wake up to read that another one of our
officers was shot and killed in the line of duty
around midnight at a barbershop, around the
corner from a huge cinema, Walmart etc.

What is wrong with people today?

I was brought up being taught that anything
after midnight is nothing but trouble and yes
I believe it as I myself had a bad accident just
prior to entering recovery many yrs ago at 2am
in the morning. Wee hours of the morning.

Anyway....who keeps a barbershop open
till midnight....sheesh....

Then another thought was about......here
we are in recovery and those of us who have
been sober for a while, know exactly how
those new in recovery are feeling and the
struggles with everyday life.

When we get sober, we are always learning
new ways to take everyday situations, deal
with them in a positive healthy way without
drinking over them. No, it not always easy, but
when we share our struggles with another
member or friend in recovery, we get feedback
or suggestions that can help us solve those
problems.

We in recovery, even tho many of us have
a few or more sober days collected together
can honestly share that in time, if we do the
footwork asked of us to do, then life situations
are less difficult than they were at that beginning
of our recovery.

We will always have some sort of life
obstacle to face because that is what
life is all about. Not person, place or
thing will suit us or be to our liking, but
none of those things will be so bad or
great that we have to loose our sobriety
over them or much more, our life.

There is always a healthy solution to
help solve problems instead of reaching
for poison that could and would kill us.

Also, as you gain more sobriety under
your belt and you are living a life in
recovery, living the steps in ur everyday
life, we do have happiness, fun, relaxation,
simplicity, serenity etc.

That's why I enjoy coming here to SR . To
be able to share life before, during and most
of all after addiction. Do the footwork, help
another member struggling with addiction,
then enjoy the rewards that come with living
a sober life like we are doing today.

SoberCAH

I was sad to see in the news the shooting you mentioned.

What a tragedy.

It's interesting to observe how many wrecks, arrests, fights, etc. happen after I go to bed (sober).

I'm glad I'm not out there running the streets and bars like I used to do.

tomsteve

but also ablessing we aren't the ones causing any chaos of that today.

aasharon90

Here Here to both of you.

SoberCAH

During the later stages of my drinking, I used to have thoughts of dying a tragic, ignominious death in which I killed innocent people in a car wreck, along with myself.

Mercifully, it didn't happen.

aasharon90

We were pretty sick in body, mind and soul
when under the influence of some bad stuff
before recovery. I too am grateful I didn't kill
anyone while driving drunk heading in the
wrong direction on the interstate.

That would have been tragic for many
of us. Right?

Id hear about folks going to jail/prison
for vehicular homicide because they
were drunk or high never realizing that
their car was a weapon.

Even tho those were sick thoughts from
a sick man, I'm glad you got help in recovery
so that those thoughts were just that and
thankfully they didn't really happen.

tomsteve

very shortly after getting sober I read an article in the newspaper( even though I lived up north I still read the Detroit free press pretty much daily. mostly liked the comics! )
about a man traveling on 12 mile road in Farmington hills and plowed into the back of a mini van
at 11 in the morning. the only person of the family to survive was the father and the only reason he survived was because he wasn't in the van- his wife and 2 kids all killed.
he was so drunk he had no recollection of the event.
I had driven that road many times and quite a few times drunk
but for the grace of God go I.

just looking it up, I was only 2 weeks sober when this occurred and amazing what the husband has done
Michigan man's loss turns into documentary about forgiveness

aasharon90

There are so many stories like that we read
and hear about almost daily. Drivers driving
under the influence of drugs, alcohol, some
sort of controlled substance that impairs
motor skills, vision, or making right decisions.

And in todays age there are folks using
cell phones while driving, texting, taking
their minds off of what's more important
at the time.

Drinking and driving. Texting and driving,
then getting behind the wheel of a truck,
car, motorcycle all thinking they can control
the situation at hand.

Before you know it, folks end up in horrific
accidents either hurting, harming, killing
innocent folks minding their own business
and living life.

For some reason while I'm making my
bed in the morning, I cant help but think,
what if this is the last time I make my bed.
What if we leave the house to never return
again because of a freak accident.

I know I have no control over other
folks driving and will never know if
half those folks r under the influence,
mentally, emotionally, physically
unstable behind the wheel or so
occupied with other thoughts or
texting.

We take a risk everytime we leave the
house, but in keeping sober and everything
in my own life in order, then I carry on
leaving the rest in my HP's hands for the
day.

How about you?

Ringo123

Hello everyone. Thanks Sharon for starting this thread.

I agree that God and the Steps take the credit for my sobriety. Made it 30 years so far. But what's more important is the quality of that sobriety "today", not the quantity.

Over the years as my life has changed, I've been very involved in AA doing service at different levels (sponsorship, group, intergroup, general service) which propelled my growth to new heights. At other times, I've pulled back to be active in OA. Around year 6-10 I basically only went to meetings and didn't drink. A miserable way to live. I don't recommend it. (smile)

In 2013 and half of 2014, the focus was service to my aging mother which I was able to do thanks to recovery in both programs. I still attended AA meetings but had to let go of commitments in order to be of service to her. What a beautiful yet painful experience it was. After her death--thanks to my recovery--there were no woulda, coulda, shoulda's; no regrets and no making amends at her gravesite.

In a future post, I'd like to share some of the fun in sobriety I've had. I'd love to read how you all are enjoying life. I'm also a recovering depressive who works very hard to keep on an even keel.

Gottalife

Hi Sharon,
yes I have a computer and will report in from time to time. One of the big pluses of this lifestyle has been the number of AAs I have met who are also out "there" living.

I was reading the earlier posts about sharing in AA. Sometimes I have problems, like today none of the local suppliers can come up with the electronic equipment I need., so I will have to get it sent from home. This is an example of a minor frustration that life throws up. It could be annoying, could make me angry, but it doesn't. I just accept and move on.

If there was a meeting tonight, as I have often thought to myself in the past, I might just talk about this problem. But when I get there and listen to the others, my problems just vanish. They don't come to mind as something to share. I would like to say that was my doing but it isn't. It just seems my problems with life are so absolutely insignificant when I think about what the newcomer is facing, wondering if they can survive the hell of alcoholism.

So my life problems only seem to come to mind when there is something useful to someone else about it. Like when my wife died, I wondered why I didn't think to drink. What had I been doing that kept me safe? What solution did I find for the grief? I find I share about this stuff when it might help someone. It is like my drinking past and my past experiences, good and bad, can all be turned to good purpose at times.

Ringo123

Sadly, I was one of those impaired drivers back in the early/mid 80's. I am so very grateful for not having caused a wreck that hurt anyone. I did have a fender bender in early 80's as I was rushing home to open up a bottle of wine and eat a cheeseburger that I had just purchased. (food and booze are my two addictions)

Also grateful to not be causing havoc late at night. I agree, bad stuff happens in the wee hours.

Life is so very different today. It's not without challenges, problems and trouble. That's just life. AA gives me the tools not only to stay sober thru the ups and downs but to be helpful in each situation.

Wishing all a good day.

aasharon90

Hi Ringo....So glad to have you join us on
our recovery journey in life and here in SR.
Another awesome tool to add to our arsenal
to combat addiction and help us stay the course
each day we remain sober.

Helping each other thru daily life, sharing
ups and downs, changes, struggles, fun
things in life, things that make us happy,
appreciative, concerns, and everything
before, during and after addiction is what
the fellowship is all about.

We don't necessarily have to be together
in person all the time, because some of us
enjoy space, a quiet place to be ourselves,
to think or relax with serenity, no stress,
because we can sit right here or there in
front of our computers and share the same
amount of knowledge we learned early on
in recovery and experiences of each day
by passing them on or sharing them.

Yes, I have fun living in recovery. Meaning,
once I learned the basics of how to live sober
with a recovery program then I was able to
go on with daily life and enjoy it without worrying
where my next drink would come from. That I
could take trips, go out to eat, shop, work at
different jobs, have relationships, a new marriage,
gardens, birds, pets, motorcycles, surgery, etc....
you name it and it was all done sober and Faith.

Even if its watching golf on tv.

You find your interests, try something new
and grow with each new experience and share
it. Who knows in sharing you may find someone
who like the same things as you or me.

It's okay to talk recovery because that is
our foundation we live and build our life upon
to enjoy each day.

aasharon90

Gotta take a break from SR from time to
time or else nothing would get done around
the house that needs getting done. Right?

Just because we're retired over here doesnt
give me the right to sit on my tush all day. But
truth be told, I do sit more than I should as ive
been waiting on warmer weather to go exercise
in the pool. Always excuses.....or is it procrastination? lol

anyway....

I'm glad you have a computer Mike with you.

What's so cool about having computer in
today time, which was not available to me
back in 1990 , is that i can come here now
anytime of the day to share recovery life
with others, on topics, situations that i need
feedback on and not have to hold onto it
finding the right time to do so.

So, i mhappy that you talked about your
situation with drivers, equipment and
things not happening in your time....and
I'm gonna say, things don't always happen
on my time either like many. Acceptance is
one of those lessons i needed to learn
and relearned often cause i want it now
and I'm too impatient to wait, which causes
more anxiety than i need.

I'm sorry to hear that your wife passed.

Grief affects each of us differently in
ways and time. That you didn't drink
during that time is something to be
commended of because so many don't
have those tools in recovery that is learned
to help during that time of grief.

My husband today had lost his wife
of 35 yrs prior to us meeting and turned
to alcohol to cope which led him to
getting a dui right down the street
after plowing down a mailbox.

Grief strickening with that lost then
on top of that he was diagnosed with
cancer. Before we met, he was ordered
to AA meeting, service work which he
completed and went thru some kind of
treatment which burned away all the
cancer emmediately. Then had the dui
taken off his record before we met in a
meeting.

All we both can say is God was taking
care of both of us during our struggles
and brought us together.

In meetings, i wouldn't air out my laundry
so to speak, and kept my sharing to the
topic at hand and share in detail one on
one or like what we are doing here in SR.

We never know when sharing here or
there what might help another going
thru similar situations just like you shared
in your post.

aasharon90

Oh my goodness.....

I was outside putting down some new rocks
and pavers in my yrd moments ago when I
heard sounds of helicopters flying above me.

First one, two passed then seconds behind
them were several more and still more to
follow. I looked to the sky grasping the top
of my white fence thinking for a moment
what was going on. Then it came to me that
they must be headed to the funeral for the
fallen officer who just recently passed.

Emotions welled up inside as I wanted
to reach up to touch them to show my
sadness and support for another senseless
death of an officer, someone dad, husband , son...

I don't know of other cities going thru
so much tragedy, crime, etc but I'm sure
they are happening each and everyday,
every minute, every hour.

I read another members post earlier shaing
about working thru issues and learning from
them regarding what others may or may not
think of us.

I know its non of my concern about my
own family, but I cant help but wonder
if they wonder why in the world would
I ever want to return to Baton Rouge
after given the opportunity to move to
Houston, which I did do yrs ago, but didn't
want to stay and returned back here,
my home, to Baton Rouge back in 2006.

Why would I give up a huge opportunity
to stay away from Baton Rouge to return
where things have changed so much since
Hurricane Katrina passed thru yrs ago.

All I can say is, Baton Rouge is my home
and always will be. There will never be
another place on this Earth that id rather
be then right here.

Yes, there is crime, but where I live I
feel safe. But of course we hear no place
is really safe. However, I live with Faith
and sobriety and live with kindness in
my heart all to the best of my human
ability.

My backyard is my safe haven. A little
piece of paradise surrounded by a high
white fence to enjoy privacy from the
outside world with lots of colorful flowers,
bushes, blooms, birds etc.

I wont knock Houston because it is
a nice city living place with so much
of everything that I didn't need. So
many homes built side by side where
you cant have total privacy.

I like room to breath. Space to mind
my own business and quiet just like
what I can get and enjoy where I am
at today.

Anyway.....just somethings I wanted to
write down on this sad day in our community.