fini

oh yes; someone once gave me a bunch of chocolates and as i bit into the first one, i tasted brandy and recoiled and spit it out. 'recoil' is exactly the right word for my reaction to tasting it.

but the paragraph quoted doesn't refer to tasting it, it refers to being 'tempted'.

come to think of it, a position of neutrality doesn't include feeling tempted, either.
hm.

fraankie

my sponsor told me
"don't take anyone's inventory"
and
i focus on myself

you should understand
"the program works, people fail"

numero uno
you don't know what's on on in someone's life to make those statements
they may have had a bad day
they may have had a good day
they may be stroking their ego
it happens, they may be trying to impress someone at the meeting
everyone has their own program
it could be their own bravado, etc

"people are my higher power"
what's wrong with that
for quite a while
my higher power was "the doorknob" to the Brooklyn Group
everyone's higher power is different

best
fraankie

muvinon

I listen in meetings to identify still today. One of the pleasures of life has been learning to decode individual's style of speaking. Of course, I do get to know them, too...so I know pretty much how very deeply these folks feel and how grateful they are to AA and for their sobriety.

Don't drink no matter what means......just that. We can be sober, regardless of what life dishes out.

The steps....yeah, I don't do them much.....means to me, just that. The person probably just lives life and is sharing that they probably would benefit from actively working the steps. I call that a "confessional" share. Sometimes people hear themselves speak. It is a pre-action stage.

People are my higher power is often said more eloquently as, "God speaks to me through people in the rooms of AA."

Not reading the Doctor's Opinion could be actually just that......someone who doesn't put stock into the Doctor's Opinion about alcoholism. If I were hearing that, I'd probably guess alcoholic/addict is speaking.

Perhaps you are demanding a bit too much from sharing in your meetings. I would ask myself, "Why? Do I need to hear precisely what I already know anyway?"

Judgmentalism of others leaves me when I am vulnerable, want to identify with others and be just another bozo on the bus, and when I am actively listening.

matt4x4

Yeah its a very interesting topic you bring up. I could never really fully understand it, how someone can keep coming to meetings and never read the Big Book. Some of them come every day, multiple meetings a day - everyday. Its like buying a gym pass and not using the machines or weights. To some extent its just a club to them, I get it, its somewhere where a person can dump the day/week/month on us like we are a freebie pyschologist. I get it, is it right? nope!!!! Thats what a sponsor is for, what AA friends are for. It is what it is, its been that way (the watered down way) for so long now, but pockets of solid AA people and solid AA messages are still out there, you just have to find them and a newcomer coming into AA has a tougher time trying to understand the manure thats spread in the AA rooms. I just love this, most meetings people bring up "Honesty" as a topic right. Then you got some "old-timer" spew something about "Fake it until you make it". Or "Just dont drink and you dont get drunk" not realizing that drinking has nothing to do with our problem. Hence those never read the book, or choose to ignore the book and regurgitate what other say because it makes them sound like "real AA'ers" hahaha. Others might say "Relapse is apart of the program" hahaha love that one, NOT!!!!!!! I just close my eyes, take a few deep breaths, and envision a beach, or perhaps I go pick up a big book and read a few chapters because some line of manure reminds me hey ya, lets check out the Docs Opinion and see what our program of action has to say.

whalebelow

Aa is full of hard drinkers. When they get unwell enough, or beat up enough or in enough financial problems and they can put it partly or wholly down to their drinking and other life choices..... They can just stop and things get better.

You'll hear it in their stories if you listen. Never tried stopping or controlling their drinking, never wanted to, just drank till they got in enough pain of some kind. Then they just stop.

They think being powerless over alcohol means they do dumb stuff when they are drunk.

The book is where you find the answers... Stick with that

dsmaxis10

It confuses me when people say my higher power my god when the bb pg 161 says theres one GOD.

larrylive

Ever wonder why people who refuse to work the program of AA, go to AA meetings?
I do. But I also know I am suppose to practice acceptance, as God's will for me is to love everyone. It's not easy and often uncomfortable, but that is my goal. As for the newcomer, the still sick and suffering, it is my purpose to share what has worked for me. That is the program of AA as spelled out in the Big Book. Which ironically enough does not include sponsors, meetings or a "higher power". It most assuredly does involve God and helping another alcoholic.

Be Well,
Larry

PS the BB specifically says not to rely on people as a power greater than yourself, as they are not.

NYCDoglvr

After going to meetings for two decades I realize it doesn't matter what other people say and do, it only matters what I do. I make a big effort not to judge other people, although it's not easy sometimes. BTW, in the BB it says "a higher power as I understand it", meaning it's up to the individual to determine his/her higher power. Whatever works.

larrylive

Could you please tell me where? I haven't been able to find find such a statement. Perhaps, because I generally refer to the first 164 pgs.

Be Well,
Larry

desypete

i see we have some of the book thumpers doing there normal routine again

if only i had a pound for everytime i hear these guys say the same things over and over agiain trying to prove there RIGHT

i hope one day they will actualy learn to live the program and stop spouting about it, now that really would be a god send : )

freshstart57

When, therefore, we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. p47

Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. p164

Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Step 3

desypete

but there is no such thing as god its just a figment of your own mind and how you believe in it

tell me why this powerful god can remove a compulsion for a drink but can not save starving kids who pray for food ? can not save kids dying from cancer and they pray ?
do you think your so special in this world that if there was a god it would listen to your prayers and save you ?

i was told i have to get honest in aa and live in the real world so i am doing
i dont turn a blind eye to the suffering that goes on in the world and pretend there is a god i face it head on there is not one

now compare that to going to aa and there and only there can i find the strength needed and the wisdom needed the love that is needed and the friendship that is needed now there is a real power greater than me that does work and works for all of us

Boleo

Aren't you the one always complaining about AA members trying to ram their ideas down other peoples throat?

What I see is D-students rebelling any time A-students try to raise others up to their level, yet at the same time, trying to drag everyone else down to their level.

fini

crumbs, Boleo; here i was, not even knowing there were D-students and A-students in AA.

i also thought it was alright to have different understandings.

maybe i'll just continue in my probably F-student way and naively think of level playing fields.

one of the really valuable aspects of forums like this is the diversity; not just in people themselves, but in ways of staying sober. to see the different paths, each with their own challenges and interpretations and life experiences colouring those interpretations.

good grief...really? A-students?!?

RobbyRobot

In the real world are billions of individuals who have a personal belief in God. Not to say other billions don't. Nonetheless, living in the real world Desy means individuals have the right of free choice.

Boleo

A students = Get a sponsor, work the steps, read the Big Book, help others.

B students = Get a sponsor, work the steps, read the Big Book.

C students = Get a sponsor, work the steps.

D students = Don't drink. Go to meetings.

F students = Go to jail. Drink when you get out.

awuh1

I hope one day you can get over the resentment you have against something you say does not exist.

I find it offensive for you to tell me (or anyone else) what is a "figment" in my (or their) mind.

Go ahead and speak your mind. You can't speak mine.

awuh1

I'd like to see that reference. If it's there, then Bill would be guilty of contradicting himself (because he wrote the first 164 pages, minus all but the first paragraph of the chapter "to employers").

In this video Bill specifically says that the group can be an individuals higher power at the 5 min 30 second point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSJB...4B8565&index=3

NYCDoglvr

It's Step 3:
“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives
over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Sorry, somewhere in the BB it refers to Higher Power as we understand him.

Pipefish

It's in Spiritual Experience...in my version of the BB it's foot of page 567 over to 568.

Faith in 'some kjnd of God' is also in We agnostics, p55. Wonderfully wisely, which kind of god is up to thd reader.....