Topic Meetings in AA -- are we missing out on something ?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
informal meetings
Originally Posted by matt4x4 
Yes this is the watered down "wide-open" factor that AA meetings has been headed toward for a long time now.
let's see what the Big Book has to say about it
162:1
Every few days this doctor suggests our approach to one of his patients. Understanding our work, he can do this with an eye to selecting those who are willing and able to recover on a spiritual basis. Many of us, former patients, go there to help. Then, in this eastern city, there are informal meetings such as we have described to you, where you may now see scores of members. There are the same fast friendships, there is the same helpfulness to one another as you find among our western friends. There is a good bit of travel between East and West and we foresee a great increase in this helpful interchange
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
all are equal in AA
topic today at the AA Jump Start Meetings was
we are all equal in AA
not matter what we have
or where we are from
we have a common bond and are all equal in AA
MM
we are all equal in AA
not matter what we have
or where we are from
we have a common bond and are all equal in AA
MM
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
happy -- sober -- alive
the topic in yesterdays Friday Morning Lakeside Jump State meeting was
happiness
yes it seems that most that share on this subject
are much happier in sobriety than they were in their drinking days
today I'm happy to be sober and alive
MM
happiness
yes it seems that most that share on this subject
are much happier in sobriety than they were in their drinking days
today I'm happy to be sober and alive
MM
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: brooklyn, new york
Posts: 1,639
Step 1
"we stand ready to do anything which will lift this merciless obsession"
Step 3
"once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock
and have the door ever so slightly open
we find that we can always open it some more"
of course willingness is a big part of the program
willingness got me out of bed at 6 am everyday to go set up the sunrise meeting
it got me to get a sponsor
it got me to take it one day at a time
it got me many times to just show up when i didn't want to go to a meeting
i've been to many topic meetings
daily reflections, living sober, gratitude
i think the great thing of topic meetyings is you get to hear others
and
as you share
you verbally reinforce your understanding of the ropic
best
fraankie
"we stand ready to do anything which will lift this merciless obsession"
Step 3
"once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock
and have the door ever so slightly open
we find that we can always open it some more"
of course willingness is a big part of the program
willingness got me out of bed at 6 am everyday to go set up the sunrise meeting
it got me to get a sponsor
it got me to take it one day at a time
it got me many times to just show up when i didn't want to go to a meeting
i've been to many topic meetings
daily reflections, living sober, gratitude
i think the great thing of topic meetyings is you get to hear others
and
as you share
you verbally reinforce your understanding of the ropic
best
fraankie
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
the AA meeting that I attended yesterday's topic
"Willing to go to any length"
When I (we) sober up
are we truly willing to go to any length
so as to get sober and stay sober ?
At times I had fooled myself
and the results were nil
MM
Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 567
Willingness -> Faith -> Action
I'm Willing to take the steps, I have Faith in the Steps, so therefore I'll do the Action.
In other words to illustrate,
I can sit on my couch and Will the front door knob to turn, cos I have Faith the knob works and it can open the door !
No, I have to get off my couch, and activate the door knob myself.
My ex-sponsor put it in an other way,
There are 3 frogs sitting on a rock,
One was willing to jump into the creek.
How many Frogs are left sitting on the rock ?
I'm Willing to take the steps, I have Faith in the Steps, so therefore I'll do the Action.
In other words to illustrate,
I can sit on my couch and Will the front door knob to turn, cos I have Faith the knob works and it can open the door !
No, I have to get off my couch, and activate the door knob myself.
My ex-sponsor put it in an other way,
There are 3 frogs sitting on a rock,
One was willing to jump into the creek.
How many Frogs are left sitting on the rock ?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Mgm, AL
Posts: 1,000
One thing I've learned in forums is that sobriety is very easy to talk about--or argue with--in theory. Some are very eloquent and compelled to express their opinions--I was "That Guy"in early sobriety and I WAS the AANazi that was mentioned. I still can be because actually DOING the steps brought about that spiritual awakening that is assured in the 12th Step. I believe (now) in the success of the program in recovering from a hopeless state of mind and body.
In my home group we have ONLY topic meetings, and some are from daily readings, from the Big Book, from AA literature. And people come back, and they ask for sponsors, and many (like myself) NEED their brains washed. In a forum the topics are lost to personality rather than principles, and I'd rather not participate.
I stopped coming here years ago because my sobriety is far more valuable to me than sharing my opinion on every thread, or waxing poetic about some theory or principle I've only heard about--we call it "parroting" in the rooms.
I don't care how a person gets sober, really. I've seen at least 6 different 12-step methods work successfully for anyone who is Honest, Open, and Willing.
When I was ready to get sober, I used the forums to verify (with experienced people) what I was hearing, and to get suggestions about applying the principles. I didn't argue about the validity of people's sobriety or their relationship with their Higher Powers. That's an AA thing.
In my home group we have ONLY topic meetings, and some are from daily readings, from the Big Book, from AA literature. And people come back, and they ask for sponsors, and many (like myself) NEED their brains washed. In a forum the topics are lost to personality rather than principles, and I'd rather not participate.
I stopped coming here years ago because my sobriety is far more valuable to me than sharing my opinion on every thread, or waxing poetic about some theory or principle I've only heard about--we call it "parroting" in the rooms.
I don't care how a person gets sober, really. I've seen at least 6 different 12-step methods work successfully for anyone who is Honest, Open, and Willing.
When I was ready to get sober, I used the forums to verify (with experienced people) what I was hearing, and to get suggestions about applying the principles. I didn't argue about the validity of people's sobriety or their relationship with their Higher Powers. That's an AA thing.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
MountainMan - Thanks for the thread and topic.
Yes, willingness is indeed the key that unlocks the gate to change for me. Simply, I had to become willing to seek help. By nature, I am not a communal individual and oft times have felt isolated from the "pod",
I really did not think there was much hope and accepted I would drink and die prematurely as a result of alcohol.
I had a slight moment of some clarity and became willing to walk in a room, again. Soon after, I became willing to post on SR. Frankly - in some regards sharing here is more difficult than in the rooms for me. The anonymous/virtual nature lends itself in my brain to harshness and or ridicule on occasion. I do not do well with either, though I am getting better with who I am and not what do you think. That's huge I believe for all in recovery.
Today I am willing to expose my thoughts in an online forum and in a room face to face. I am ok with whatever responses I get because I know the message is driven not from the mouths (or typing fingers) of the respondent, but from a greater reality........
Thanks Bob!
__________________
Yes, willingness is indeed the key that unlocks the gate to change for me. Simply, I had to become willing to seek help. By nature, I am not a communal individual and oft times have felt isolated from the "pod",
I really did not think there was much hope and accepted I would drink and die prematurely as a result of alcohol.
I had a slight moment of some clarity and became willing to walk in a room, again. Soon after, I became willing to post on SR. Frankly - in some regards sharing here is more difficult than in the rooms for me. The anonymous/virtual nature lends itself in my brain to harshness and or ridicule on occasion. I do not do well with either, though I am getting better with who I am and not what do you think. That's huge I believe for all in recovery.
Today I am willing to expose my thoughts in an online forum and in a room face to face. I am ok with whatever responses I get because I know the message is driven not from the mouths (or typing fingers) of the respondent, but from a greater reality........
Thanks Bob!
__________________
paradox
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 665
This topic of willingness doesn't seem to go away -- no matter how many alternatives are mentioned.
I like to think that I have been willing, even when procrastination was an outstanding defect in my character.
Alas, the only way that I can be sure that I am (or was) willing is when I am taking the action.
Like many lessons in life, I learned this in an AA meeting.
I was out of town and visiting a new AA meeting.
It happened to be a step meeting -- step 8.
I was procrastinating on some major amends at the time.
An old-timer shared: "How do I know that I am willing to make amends?"
Then he knocked on a table and said: "When I hear the sound of my knocking on their door."
I still work on removing my propensity to procrastinate.
For this reason, willingness is a concept that I seldom contemplate.
I only KNOW that I was willing in hind sight.
To carry on Pete's former sponsor's analogy:
I am the third frog and the only way that I can honestly say that I am willing is after I am wet.
I am better off when I just do it:
take that leap.
I like to think that I have been willing, even when procrastination was an outstanding defect in my character.
Alas, the only way that I can be sure that I am (or was) willing is when I am taking the action.
Like many lessons in life, I learned this in an AA meeting.
I was out of town and visiting a new AA meeting.
It happened to be a step meeting -- step 8.
I was procrastinating on some major amends at the time.
An old-timer shared: "How do I know that I am willing to make amends?"
Then he knocked on a table and said: "When I hear the sound of my knocking on their door."
I still work on removing my propensity to procrastinate.
For this reason, willingness is a concept that I seldom contemplate.
I only KNOW that I was willing in hind sight.
To carry on Pete's former sponsor's analogy:
I am the third frog and the only way that I can honestly say that I am willing is after I am wet.
I am better off when I just do it:
take that leap.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
6th month -- so, today the topice was
Step 6
Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
I'm ready God. Just waiting on your timing, I guess ??
MopuntainmanBob
Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
I'm ready God. Just waiting on your timing, I guess ??
MopuntainmanBob
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
hi Bob,last Thursday night our meeting was on steps 6 and 7
after I did my 5th step with my sponsor,I went home for 1 hour and sat and reviewed my first 5 steps.I spent that "hour of Grace"with God and even thanked Him
i thought of how much I wanted the past gone and a new chance at life.
when i thought of those defects of character,i look back on my 4th step.I seen those 4 aweful defects,selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?
well,I just had to ask myself 2 questions from step 6
did i believe God could remove those d3efects?
Did I really want Him too?
I answered yes to both questions and went on to step 7
what I have found out is he really did remove that stuff by giving me a new sober life,and restoring my sanity.That old life was replaced by a new,growing life.
It isn`t perfect,and it isn`t supposed to be.Today it is what it supposed to be.
If he didn`t remove the defects,then I would be living as I once lived.
I never would help anyone unless there was something in it for me.
Today AA`ers has shown me something called a "giving which demands no return."I look for ways to be helpful and give most of the time.
This sober life is better than anything I could have thought possible for me.
Step 6 plays a important part of it
ty Bob for the topics
after I did my 5th step with my sponsor,I went home for 1 hour and sat and reviewed my first 5 steps.I spent that "hour of Grace"with God and even thanked Him
i thought of how much I wanted the past gone and a new chance at life.
when i thought of those defects of character,i look back on my 4th step.I seen those 4 aweful defects,selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened?
well,I just had to ask myself 2 questions from step 6
did i believe God could remove those d3efects?
Did I really want Him too?
I answered yes to both questions and went on to step 7
what I have found out is he really did remove that stuff by giving me a new sober life,and restoring my sanity.That old life was replaced by a new,growing life.
It isn`t perfect,and it isn`t supposed to be.Today it is what it supposed to be.
If he didn`t remove the defects,then I would be living as I once lived.
I never would help anyone unless there was something in it for me.
Today AA`ers has shown me something called a "giving which demands no return."I look for ways to be helpful and give most of the time.
This sober life is better than anything I could have thought possible for me.
Step 6 plays a important part of it
ty Bob for the topics
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
2:56 AM and awake here on site
just had a nice cigar out in the Jacuzzi watching the stars
think I will go the morning Jump Start AA meeting at 9:15
the topic for the day usually comes from the reading of The Daily Reflections
pretty good place in which to get a topic
keeping fresh with our sobriety is of most importance
MM
just had a nice cigar out in the Jacuzzi watching the stars
think I will go the morning Jump Start AA meeting at 9:15
the topic for the day usually comes from the reading of The Daily Reflections
pretty good place in which to get a topic
keeping fresh with our sobriety is of most importance
MM
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,781
I've been in the program for years and have never heard the term topic meeting.. I've heard discussion meetings. 12x12 study groups. Big book study groups. Speaker meetings.. maybe its just where its located or just me, also heard beginner meetings, all mens, all womens etc..
please don't beat me up for saying this but when someone sits down to chair and all the effort they've put into the meeting is topic is willingness or the other day a young man chaired and he said the topic is letting go i get frustrated...
I come from an older men's group that prepares a little more.. someone will get something out of the BB, As Bill see's it, Keep it Simple etc... Don't get me wrong, I've never been to a bad meeting, I always get something out of it but I really like to see someone do their home work and put in a little extra effort... just my .02 cents.. sure I'll get blasted for my reply.. Just the way I feel...
please don't beat me up for saying this but when someone sits down to chair and all the effort they've put into the meeting is topic is willingness or the other day a young man chaired and he said the topic is letting go i get frustrated...
I come from an older men's group that prepares a little more.. someone will get something out of the BB, As Bill see's it, Keep it Simple etc... Don't get me wrong, I've never been to a bad meeting, I always get something out of it but I really like to see someone do their home work and put in a little extra effort... just my .02 cents.. sure I'll get blasted for my reply.. Just the way I feel...
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
I think you make a good point Dave. A few groups in my home town would prefer the lead to be prepared, but many others would take the jaundiced view that somehow speaking off the cuff is more honest than being prepared. I don't really understand that except as a rationalisation for laziness.
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