Attending meetings with spouse

[anotherquitter]

Today is my second day without drinking. I attended my first AA meeting last night. I plan on attending another one tonight.

My spouse has been in the AA program for a very long time, from long before we met and moved here, although she does not attend meetings very frequently apart from a womans only meeting that she attends semi-weekly.

I'm trying to decide if I can or should ask her to come to a meeting with me occasionally. I'm trying to understand the pros/cons of this and what is considered acceptable protocol. I don't want her to feel I'm excluding her, but I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not.

Has anyone else had a similar situation with a spouse or partner?

[Jfanagle]

I have taken a few ladies with me to an occasional meeting, including my new wife back when we first started dating, some 8 years ago. She was curious what the meetings were all about, so I don't see this as applicable in your case, since your wife already know.

If it were me I would ask the wife, "Do you care to join me at a meeting?" You might even let her know your feelings, that is, do you or don't you want her to attend?

The hardest thing for me to get a grip on when I first quit was the straight forward approach to other people. I had spent so much time being elusive and secretive and in my case dishonest with those around me that the concept of just saying what was on my mind was very difficult.

Those who care about us want to have us reach out, and ask for their input. As to protocol, unless it is a stag meeting as a member of the fellowship she is certainly welcome to all meetings including the closed type. Just tell her to behave herself! LOL. After your black eye heals you will be just fine.

Sobriety can be a lot of fun, include your wife is my suggestion; however let her tell you her feelings on accompanying you.

Just my suggestions and I was divorced for 20 years up until 45 days ago, so bear that in mind.

Jon

[DayTrader]

Many ppl separate spouses and program......I know it works well that way but it doesn't HAVE to be that way. Why keep separate the two most important human relationships you have? - AA and your spouse? ......especially if you don't HAVE to?

Early on, you may feel uncomfortable getting COMPLETELY honest with ppl who know you around.....sometimes that's easier to do with strangers.