Your Own Best Thinking Got You Here - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information > Alcoholism Information > Alcoholism-12 Step Support
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read





Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 07-15-2010, 06:33 AM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 
Mark75's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,950

Your Own Best Thinking Got You Here


What does that mean to you?

This is one of those slogans that I have tried to just let roll off my back... And I even inventoried about it... and, yeah, I have some defects of character in the pride department ...

I never once thought my best thinking, even while I was "active", got me here... I knew I was addicted, I knew I was breaking some rules, I knew there was all sorts of justification and rationalization goin' on... again, even at the time.... while I was active..... I never once thought my thinking was "my best"

I see it as a long the lines of .... take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth... now, that one, also edgy, doesn't bother me at all.... because, I guess, at many times in early recovery, and even now ... it's true.
Mark75 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Mark75 For This Useful Post:
aasharon90 (07-15-2010), Angelic17 (07-15-2010), BadCompany (07-15-2010), Brucel (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), intention (07-15-2010), jane_668 (07-15-2010), tallcactus (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 06:43 AM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: May 2010
Location: Woodbridge, VA
Posts: 19
That is a great questions.

Your own best thinking got you here.

That to me means a lot. To me, it is saying that all the times i tried to lie to myself about not having a problem, or trying to contol my drinking, or becuase i was intoxicated on a daily basis, the decisions I made to drive, to not pay a bill so that I could buy my booze, to get a babysitter so I could drink all weekend without worrying about my child, to calling into work becuase i had a hangover, to lying to all the people that i loved to hide my drinking.

These were my best ways of thinking, or dealing with my life, MY WAY!! My way is what got me here. My way was not working anymore, if it ever did at all. My way made me miserable and wanted to give up on life. Now, when i got in the program and decided to put "my way" down and try a different way, getting a sponsor and started my steps, and finding a higher power, my life started getting a little better. Better than anything I could have done by myself. I know, i have tried that before many times and doing things on my terms never worked out before.

Alcohol is but a SYMPTOM of the disease called alcoholism.
ChristinaW is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to ChristinaW For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), EuroDrunk (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 06:48 AM   #3 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: somewhere
Posts: 917
Interesting topic. For me, I always knew that something was wrong with my thinking. I grew up as a codependent with low self esteem. I had a distorted believe system that viewed only negative things . My brain always told me that I am not worth it. The time when I relaized that my best thinking was wrong saved me. I stopped listening to my brain and started listening to others. I started doing others ways. If you have a defective navigation system then you will never be able to drive safely. I had to rely on others. I had to slowly change the defected parts and rebuild a better navigation system. Life started to sound good.
__________________
IT DOESNOT MATTER HOW I AM TREATED BY LIFE ;
------- MY REAL LIFE LIES WITHIN
jane_668 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to jane_668 For This Useful Post:
desertgirl (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 07:03 AM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,096
One of those phrases that probably got my back up at one time.

Self can not get me out of self.

I had to accept that doing things the way I wanted wasn't working. I had to be open minded to the possibility that what I thought was best for me just might not be so. I had to give myself completely to this simple program, setting aside my opinion of certain long-held beliefs.

I had to become willing to do what I didn't believe would work. And do it anyway.

Why would I be willing to do that? Because I saw that it really worked in others and I was convinced of the hopelessness and futility of life as I'd been living it.

quote aabb1st
keithj is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to keithj For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), hps (07-15-2010), intention (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010), RobbyRobot (07-16-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 07:07 AM   #5 (permalink)
Member
 
Mark75's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,950
Quote:
Originally Posted by keithj View Post

I had to become willing to do what I didn't believe would work. And do it anyway.
Gotcha!! Thanx!!... If we try to think through the paradoxes, the (sometimes) blind faith we must have and to do that which is counterintuitive...

Yea, Thanx all, I am seeing that slogan a little differently now....
Mark75 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Mark75 For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), Brucel (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 07:23 AM   #6 (permalink)
Forward we go...side by side
 
CarolD's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 37,595
There are many of our "sayings" I never use
and ignore when others do.

Try this Mark....take a positive spin ...
"My best thinking got me into the rooms of AA"
__________________
Each Day Sober Is A Victory!!
Joy In AA Recovery!

CarolD is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to CarolD For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), findingout (07-15-2010), Lenina (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010), RobbyRobot (07-16-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 07:45 AM   #7 (permalink)
Member
 
Mark75's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,950
I like that too...
Mark75 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Mark75 For This Useful Post:
ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 10:47 AM   #8 (permalink)
The truth shall set you free
 
Timebuster's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: United States
Posts: 4,626
I have nearly ruined my life-- my finances, my career, my health, my friendships, my relationships-- with my addictions, because I thought (for nearly 28 years) that I could handle them all on my own. If only I had the right job, enough money, the perfect girlfriend, the respect I deserved from my friends and colleagues, I told myself, then my problems would be solved.

Well, sometimes the old, overused recovery cliches are right on; in all honesty, my best thinking did get me here. I thought I could beat this disease on my own. My thinking got me very far in other parts of my life, but it kept me sick and ultimately got me where I am today. And my best thinking won't get me out of this mess, either. I need to reach out to others and embrace a new way of living. I can't fix my brain with my brain. My own experience has verified that repeatedly

Today, I understand the nature of my disease (my stinking thinking) in a much different light. As long as simply not getting loaded was the foundation of my recovery, my disease then had hundreds of options remaining that it could use to keep me sick.

Ivan
__________________
Fear - False Evidence Appearing Real.

Denial - Don't Even Notice I Am Lying

Everybody's at war with different things, I'm at war with my own heart, sometimes.
Timebuster is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Timebuster For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), intention (07-15-2010), keithj (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010), RobbyRobot (07-16-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 11:05 AM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 
Brucel's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2010
Location: chico, ca
Posts: 321
Good food for thought Mark. For me I have to agree with you that it kinda pounds my ego when I think my best thinking got me here, although I don't remember using my best thinking much when I was drinking. I like to think now that after 5 years my best thinking KEEPS me here. God Bless
Brucel is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Brucel For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-15-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 12:15 PM   #10 (permalink)
Blu**ed Lines...A ClockWork SR
 
ElegantlyWasted's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: AZ
Posts: 2,529
Blog Entries: 10
Thanks Mark,
" a long the lines of .... take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth... now, that one, also edgy, doesn't bother me at all.... because, I guess, at many times in early recovery, and even now"

Progress not perfection my inner voice screams... I know that my inner Demons will aways be there somewhere, I know now how not to do as they bid.
__________________
He who neglects what is done for what ought to be done, sooner effects his ruin than his preservation.
ElegantlyWasted is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to ElegantlyWasted For This Useful Post:
Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 01:14 PM   #11 (permalink)
Don't resist, allow
 
intention's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: South East of England
Posts: 1,521
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark75 View Post
Your own best thinking got you here. What does that mean to you?
That my ego (thinking) got me here.

It was my ego (thinking) that always wanted, more, more, more.
It was my ego (thinking) that always wanted to feel better.
It was my ego (thinking) that was never happy with what I had.
It was my ego (thinking) that said that I could drink like normal people.
It was my ego (thinking) that told me that if everyone else didn't upset me, I wouldn't have to drink.
It was my ego (thinking) that said that my way of quitting would work.
It was my ego (thinking) that said that it was not fair that I was not like other people.
It was my ego (thinking) that said that I could not admit defeat.
It was my ego (thinking) that deluded me as to what my life was like when I was drinking.
It was my ego (thinking) that told me that I couldn't be an alcoholic like "those" people.
It was my ego (thinking) that was leading me to an alcoholic death.....



Boleo often posts here a quote by Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj where he says (I think these are the words, correct me if I am wrong) "What part of man's thinking is delusional? All of it." That quote came to mind when I read this discussion.

What I am learning is that I am best not thinking because when I am not thinking, I am at one with God because I have let go of my ego and that is when my life takes on a whole new dimension full of joy and peace and it is far more rewarding than anything I ever attained through my thinking, best or otherwise.
__________________
"Know that at any moment in your life, you have the choice. You can either be a host to God,
or a hostage to your ego.
It's your call.
Stay inspired [in spirit]"
Wayne Dyer



All quotes from first edition of Alcoholics Anonymous
intention is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to intention For This Useful Post:
Angelic17 (07-15-2010), Brucel (07-17-2010), ElegantlyWasted (07-19-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010), RobbyRobot (07-16-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 02:45 PM   #12 (permalink)
Laozi Old Man
 
Boleo's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark75 View Post

I never once thought my best thinking, even while I was "active", got me here... I knew I was addicted, I knew I was breaking some rules, I knew there was all sorts of justification and rationalization goin' on... again, even at the time.... while I was active..... I never once thought my thinking was "my best"
I agree. It was not "my best thinking" that got me into addiction - it was my delusional thinking. The Hindu's, Buddhist's and Taoist's figured out at least 2.500 years ago that delusional thinking is what is responsible for most of man's mistakes. A man's best thinking comes after enlightenment.

Bill Wilson figured out what man's best thinking is during the 11th step:

"On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while.
What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it."
__________________


"Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more Taobell!"

- All Big Book quotes are from first Edition -
Boleo is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Boleo For This Useful Post:
intention (07-16-2010), keithj (07-16-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 05:03 PM   #13 (permalink)
12-Step Recovered Alcoholic
 
DayTrader's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,331
Sometimes, I take "your best thinking put you here" as a positive thing - as if it's saying: your thinking (ability to be in denial and/or delusion) is soooo good you can out-fox yourself into doing dumb things. (heh - yes....I see how I can also stroke my delicate ego by saying that...lol). It's a reminder to me to try to be awake to the fact that my false-ego IS able to trick me sometimes. In other words, my false-ego can be smarter than I am on occasion.

I also use "your best thinking got you here" as a negative tool to put my ego back in check. I tend not to "like" it as well when I hear it or say it to myself in this manner but it's true. I wasn't completely asleep all those years....and I sure as heck am here (thankfully ).


Another option is to consider that there were plenty of times I drank, did dumb things, did mean things, did things I'd regret for years......and I "knew" better than to do them.....but I did them anyway. So, in SPITE of my knowing not to do things....or TO do other things....I often chose the wrong path with my actions. This one is similar to what Keith said. "My thinking," as great as it may be, is nowhere near as impressive as I sometimes like to think it is......and it's NOWHERE near as important as the actions I TAKE.
__________________
"We can't solve our problems using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them." - Albert Einstein
/-all BB quotes-1st. Edition-\
DayTrader is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to DayTrader For This Useful Post:
ElegantlyWasted (07-19-2010), Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 05:43 PM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 104
I generally did my damndest and I believe most people do. My damndest got me here.
Actually today do less than my damndest compared to the fight of drinking mixed with the struggle of living.
Small difference nowadays is just started picking up a few suggestions here and there on how better to direct that damndest.
JeremiahS is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to JeremiahS For This Useful Post:
Mark75 (07-15-2010)
Old 07-15-2010, 06:22 PM   #15 (permalink)
Member
 
Mark75's Avatar
 

Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,950
I am so glad I posted this question, great responses, thank you all. I understand this slogan very well know and it is no longer "toxic"... So many times these simple phrases mean so very much, I was just never able to "crack the code" for this one... now I have with your help, thanx...

Hmm... And I thought I was using my best thinking... LOL

Mark
Mark75 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Mark75 For This Useful Post:
ElegantlyWasted (07-19-2010), intention (07-16-2010)
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:35 AM.