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04-23-2009, 08:28 PM
| #1 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,138
| Finally - some light
Tonight I received some hope. My daughter and I have been estranged for 5 years. She is 16, and a wonderful young woman. I was not emotionally available during her younger years, due to my alcoholism, and lost her because of this. At Christmas, she contacted me, and wanted to get together, but got cold feet a few days before we were to meet. Tonight she contacted me and said she is ready. Gave me her cell number. Wants to get together. This came hard on the heels of three very difficult days - days where I drove home and prayed out loud, cried, and screamed in my car - all in relation to a completely different situation. A situation that was out of my control, and I was in pain because of it. Tonight I shared at my HG - it's all-women, so I felt safe to share from the heart. And I was left with this gaping wound - at least it felt like that. And I was reminded of how much I used to rely on drugs and alcohol, sex and relationships to make me feel better, to help me to forget. And so - it is especially gratifying to receive such a gift as this. The gift of a daughters love and forgiveness. Every ounce of pain and turmoil has been worth it. Thanks to all my teachers here and in the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous for sharing your Experience, Strength and Hope. |
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04-23-2009, 08:31 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: UK
Posts: 18,303
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Yay!  This makes me very happy Rowan, you are a special friend.
__________________  . As from a fire aflame thousands of sparks come forth, even so from the Creator an infinity of beings have life and to him return again. -- Maitri Upanishads |
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04-23-2009, 08:39 PM
| #3 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Somewhere Out There
Posts: 9,092
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That's wonderful, Rowan. I hope you and your daughter can begin a new and loving relationship.
__________________ We call them dumb animals, and so they are, for they cannot tell us how they feel, but they do not suffer less because they have no words. - Anna Sewell - So oftentimes it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key. - The Eagles |
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04-23-2009, 09:09 PM
| #4 (permalink) | |
| Wesley Employee Extraordinaire  Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Kansas
Posts: 9,340
| Quote:
Long after I got clean/sober, I still used the sex and relationships to make me feel better. It certainly didn't go unnoticed by several concerned friends in AA either. I can't say I know exactly how you feel in regards to your daughter because I've never lost a child over my alcoholism/addictions, but I do know God seems to give me gifts just when I need them the most too. :ghug :ghug :ghug
__________________ DeVon & the Zoo Crew  Worry is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained. ~Arthur Somers Roche | |
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04-24-2009, 08:30 AM
| #10 (permalink) |
| Member  Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Glitzville
Posts: 335
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That is awesome news, Rowan! Sending good thoughts for this new beginning with you and your daughter.  Donna
__________________ Peace doesn't require two people; it requires only one. It has to be you. The problem begins and ends there. Byron Katie |
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