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Old 04-02-2009, 07:25 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Thank God for AA

Hey everyone, I've been away for a while but not I've not gone out. I have a ton of things going on right now. I'm in the middle of a divorce. Turns out my wife of fourteen years has been have an affiar for the past year. Things are getting ugly with a possible custody battle looming. I've been leaning on my AA family a lot. If it were not for AA I probably would not be alive today. AA has taught me that no matter what life throws at me I can go through it without taking a drink.
I've been meaning to come here a share with the people that lead me to AA in a time when I would have never stepped into the rooms on my own.
Thanks to all of you for the gift of AA. Because of it I can be there for my kids during a time when they need me the most.
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Old 04-02-2009, 07:34 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I haven't experienced what it is that you are going through, but I have been close to some that have. I love your attitude Dan ... stay close to AA share often and thank God as you understand Him, for being sober this day.

You're in my thoughts & prayers.
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Old 04-02-2009, 07:41 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Good to hear from you Dan. The wreckage of my past took time to reconcile, but it has and goodness and hope continue. You are in my thoughts and prayers. If I can help, please let me know.

Ron
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Old 04-02-2009, 08:02 AM   #4 (permalink)
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We all have to learn not to place conditions on our sobriety. Spouse or no spouse, job or no job etc. I know how painful a time, you're going through right now. You will get past this point and the pain will ease. Just don't add to it by drinking today.

Rely on God, and your AA group, you're going to need both. Just don't isolate, to be alone in thought right now.
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Old 04-02-2009, 08:33 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Welcome Home Dan,

Good to hear from you, sorry it's under such circumstances

You know, one of the biggest "hooey" statements I have ever heard in the rooms is "Don't make major decisions/changes the first year"

Well, first, you don't need to make any "new" major decisions/changes the first year in my experience, they seem to be made for you (just my experience and observation) and the first year is NOTHING but major changes.

The good news is I have never not seen it turn out to be for the best.

When we were unhealthy, we set up unhealthy "systems" as we get sober and start getting better these structures invariably all come crashing down.

The good news is keep coming back, keep working the steps, keep working with a sponsor, then pass on what you have so freely received, and "new structures" and "new systems" replace the old ones that are better then anything we could have imagined. Usually, by the way, without any apparent "effort" on our part, if we "let go and let God" and just "do the next right thing" and get out of our own (and God's) way, this stuff ALWAYS gets better.

Anyhow, I'm sorry for what you are going through, but I promise you with all of my heart and soul, keep coming back and doing the deal, and it will always turn out for the best.

This is part of the program I don't understand, nor do I try to, but doing the steps (for me) are like building a radio for talking to God, if we are still and Quiet, God "talks back", of course if we aren't, God sends freight trains, but "his plan" is always better then my plan.

I am not religious in the slightest by the way, but I believe this with the same certainty and for the same reason I believe that if I flip a light switch, the light goes on.

Experience and Observation. I don't even question it, I have seen it too many times.

Welcome Home Dan, Keep coming back, keep telling us how you are, we care.
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Old 04-02-2009, 09:34 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Dan,sorry to hear about your divorce but it is good you are hanging with AA.Best wishes to you friend.
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Old 04-02-2009, 12:39 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Good to hear from you. Divorce is no fun. About all I can say for it is it helped get me back in the program.
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Old 04-02-2009, 01:18 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tkdan View Post
I'm in the middle of a divorce. Turns out my wife of fourteen years has been have an affiar for the past year. Things are getting ugly with a possible custody battle looming. I've been leaning on my AA family a lot. If it were not for AA I probably would not be alive today. AA has taught me that no matter what life throws at me I can go through it without taking a drink.
Geez Dan, I was going through the same thing 4 years ago, without the help of AA I don't know where I'd be now. On second thought, yes I do, and it wouldn't be a good place.

I don't have a lot to add. Always remember that AA can be a safe place, I still feel like it's my home, it's members are my family.

Have faith, stay strong, and know without a doubt that the best possible things you can imagine will come out of this, you'll be the father that every child deserves to have. This is just the beginning of your story, there's a lot left to be written.
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Old 04-02-2009, 07:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Dan....that is a pwerful message to the newcomer and i thankyou for posting it..
Showing others it is possible to cope without a drink even when life gets a bit...painful..

Im sorry to hear your news and your commitment humbles me..

Enjoy and lean on the beautiful fellowship of alcoholics anonymous.

And god be with you....all the way.......trucker
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:40 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Thanks all. Life does have its ups and downs but AA is the one constant that I can rely on.
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Old 04-03-2009, 07:49 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Hi Dan
When I go through those trying times I remember some AA slogans and it is real helpful. One day at a time. This too shall pass. Don't drink no matter what. God will not give you anything you cannot handle. Love in AA, Pinetree
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:20 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Dear god,
Hope you got the letter,
And I pray you can make it better down here.
I dont mean a big reduction in the price of beer,
But all the people that you made in your image,
See them starving on their feet,
cause they dont get enough to eat

From god,
I cant believe in you.

Dear god,
Sorry to disturb you,
But I feel that I should be heard loud and clear.
We all need a big reduction in amount of tears,
And all the people that you made in your image,
See them fighting in the street,
cause they cant make opinions meet,
About god,
I cant believe in you.

Did you make disease, and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too!

Dear god,
Dont know if you noticed,
But your name is on a lot of quotes in this book.
Us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look,
And all the people that you made in your image,
Still believing that junk is true.
Well I know it aint and so do you,
Dear god,
I cant believe in,
I dont believe in,

I wont believe in heaven and hell.
No saints, no sinners,
No devil as well.
No pearly gates, no thorny crown.
Youre always letting us humans down.
The wars you bring, the babes you drown.
Those lost at sea and never found,
And its the same the whole world round.
The hurt I see helps to compound,
That the father, son and holy ghost,
Is just somebodys unholy hoax,
And if youre up there youll perceive,
That my hearts here upon my sleeve.
If theres one thing I dont believe in...

Its you,
Dear god.
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:54 PM   #13 (permalink)
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After 25 yrs marriage, 18 yrs sober, leaving
my spouse back there in Houston, I returned
to my home town of Baton Rouge, La. and
divorced last June.

I was the one in recovery and thus changed
in the middle of the marriage and left everyone
behind not sure of what happened.

Anyway....i took care of me and stayed close
to my program with the awesome support of
SR and Faith from Above to guide me all along
the way.

No matter how tough it gets in life, there's
nothing so bad today that id want to return
to the drink.

What helped me thru the divorce was to
keep the emotions out of it.....since we
separated living in 2 states, we didnt see
each other. I didnt answer my phone
so we didnt hear each others voices.

Emails were all that we used to communicate
with.

Before i knew it....we were divorced and
thus we split on much better pleasant terms.

I still havent verbally talked to my family
since we split and divorced.

Ive moved on with my life and have imbarked
on a new journey and new marriage built on
trust, honesty, faith and recovery living
happy joyous and free.

Hang in there and SR is here when u need us.
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Old 04-03-2009, 07:05 PM   #14 (permalink)
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danny, great seeing you again...

and dang, thats some adversity going on!

as you stated, your getting through it, and you will be ok...

a power of example, that you are, our friend...

rz
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:01 PM   #15 (permalink)
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JJ Tissot - Jesus at the Sermon on the Mount.


THE EIGHT BEATITUDES OF JESUS


"Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are they who mourn,
for they shall be comforted.

Blessed are the meek,
for they shall inherit the earth.

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they shall be satisfied.

Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy.

Blessed are the pure of heart,
for they shall see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they shall be called children of God.

Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."

Gospel of St. Matthew 5:3-10



Carl Heinrich Bloch - Jesus at the Sermon on the Mount, Copenhagen, Denmark, 1872.


ON THE BEATITUDES


"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."
"Poor in spirit" means to be humble. Humility is the realization that all your gifts and blessings come from the grace of God. To have poverty of spirit means to be completely empty and open to the Word of God. When we are an empty cup and devoid of pride, we are humble. Humility brings an openness and an inner peace, allowing one to do the will of God.

It is pride, the opposite of humility, that brings misery. For pride brings anger and the seeking of revenge, especially when one is offended. If every man were humble and poor in spirit, there would be no war!


"Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted."
If we are humble and appreciate that all of our gifts and blessings come from God, we grow in love and gratitude for Jesus Christ our Savior. But this can only produce mourning and regret over our own sins and the sins of this world, for we have hurt the one who has been so good to us.

St. Gregory describes another reason to mourn: the more one ascends in meditation of Divine Truth, Beauty, and Goodness, and then realize the poverty of human nature, man can only be left in sorrow. When one contemplates that we were made in the image and likeness of God and lived in Paradise, the Garden of Eden, and compare that to our present state after the Fall, one can only mourn our present condition. But the sentence continues that they shall be comforted, by the Comforter, the Holy Spirit, and hopefully one day in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Mourning in this context is called a blessing, because mourning our fallen nature creates in us a desire to improve ourselves and to do what is right!


"Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth."
St. Gregory of Nyssa taught that the Beatitudes build one upon another. A humble person becomes meek, or becomes gentle and kind, and exhibits a docility of spirit, even in the face of adversity and hardship. St. Augustine advises us to be meek in the face of the Lord, and not resist but be obedient to him. Obedience and submission to the will of God are certainly not in vogue these days, but they will bring one peace in this world and in the next.


"Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied."
A continuous desire for justice and moral perfection will lead one to a fulfillment of that desire - a transition and conversion to holiness. This is true for all the virtues - if you hunger and thirst for temperance, you will head towards the goal you have in mind. St. Augustine, in his discourse on the Lord's Sermon on the Mount, notes the correspondence of the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit and their necessity in fulfilling the Beatitudes. For example, one must have the gift of fortitude so one may be courageous in seeking justice.


"Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."
Mercy is the loving disposition towards those who suffer distress. Love, compassion, and forgiveness towards one's neighbor will bring peace in your relationships. We say in the Lord's Prayer: Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. As we are merciful to others, so our Heavenly Father will be merciful with us! Jesus reminds us that whatever "you did to the least of my brethren, you did it to me (Matthew 25:31-46)." St. Paul calls for the obedience of faith in the beginning and end of his Letter to the Romans (1:5, 16:25-27). The following are ways to be merciful to your neighbor, as well as obedient in faith to Christ our Savior.

The Corporal Works of Mercy
1 Feed the Hungry
2 Give drink to the thirsty
3 Clothe the naked
4 Shelter the homeless
5 Comfort the imprisoned
6 Visit the sick
7 Bury the dead

The Spiritual Works of Mercy
1 Admonish sinners
2 Instruct the uninformed
3 Counsel the doubtful
4 Comfort the sorrowful
5 Be patient with those in error
6 Forgive offenses
7 Pray for the living and the dead


"Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God."
Moses (Exodus 33:20), John (1:18), and Paul (1Timothy 6:16) all say that no one can see God here on earth! But Jesus says the pure of heart shall see God! To be pure of heart means to be free of all selfish intentions and self-seeking desires. What a beautiful goal! How many times have any of us performed an act perfectly free of any personal gain? Such an act is pure love. An act of pure and selfless giving brings happiness to all.


"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God."
Peacemakers not only live peaceful lives but also try to bring peace and friendship to others, and to preserve peace between God and man. St. Gregory of Nyssa calls a peacemaker a man who brings peace to another; but one cannot give another what one does not possess oneself. Hence the Lord wants you first to be yourself filled with the blessings of peace and then to communicate it to those who have need of it. By imitating God's love of man, the peacemakers become children of God.


"Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven."
Jesus said many times that those who follow Him will be persecuted. "If they persecute me, they will persecute you" (John 15:20-21). Stephen, Peter and Paul, nearly all of the Apostles, and many Christians in the Roman era suffered martyrdom. The twentieth century with its two World Wars has seen its share of martyrs such as Maximilian Kolbe, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and the Central American martyrs. But the Lord promised those that suffer for his sake will be rewarded with the Kingdom of Heaven!



Jesus
Mary
The Bible



REFERENCES
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LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU
WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE
IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD


J - Jesus first
O - Others next
Y - Yourself last

John 14:6
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