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Old 10-23-2008, 12:15 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Spirtuality

How do I find it?
How do I do it?

I don't know where to start.

Everything I think seems foggy and unclear. May be I don't know what I think. Or I just can't think that hard.

I know I'm making progress but some days it feels like I take 10 steps back.
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Old 10-23-2008, 01:11 PM   #2 (permalink)
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For me, spirituality is only experienced when I did, and do the following things. I had to and still have to on a daily basis, do the following:

- I had/have to stop fighting everyone and everything, including stopping analyzing how and why it works, or why I drank, or why I am afflicted with this disease, or why.... you get my point, I must give it all up to a higher power and realise it "just is".
- I had/have to surrender myself to the fact that I was an alcoholic and no matter what I could not control my drinking or my thinking.
- I had/have to honestly and truly open my athiest/agnostic mind to the fact that there is "something" outside of me that controls and directs my life, if I am un-blocked enough to feel it.
- I had/have to shut up and listen to my sponsor and the people in the many AA meetings I went to.
- I had/have to diligently enter into learning the 12 steps and work to incorporate them into my daily life.
- I had/have to reach out my hand when someone is struggling, just as those before me did for me.
- I had/have to understand that my thinking is flawed and cannot be trusted.

Most of all, what works to ground me is to stay connected to the fellowship of AA and to continually study the solution as it is detailed in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Stick to the 12 steps, the promises has come true for several million people.

Thanks to AA and the 12 steps, my worst day today is way better than my best days then...



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"my mind is a terrible thing, and it must be stopped..."
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Old 10-23-2008, 02:14 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I can't say that I found it, or that I did it, but I started in the rooms of AA and listened to others share their experiences. When I was finally able to quiet my way of thinking and let go of trying to control my spirituality, I found that my Higher Power gave it to me.

I thought this was pretty profound........

Tuesday, February 19, 2008
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go

Our Path

I just spent several hours with someone from my group, and I feel like I'm losing my mind. This woman insisted that the only way I would make progress in my program was to go to her church and succumb to her religious rules. She pushed and insisted, and insisted and pushed. She's been in the program so much longer than I have. I kept thinking that she must know what she's talking about. But it didn't feel right. And now I feel crazy, afraid, guilty, and ashamed.
--Anonymous

The spiritual path and growth promised to us by the Twelve Steps does not depend on any religious belief. They are not contingent upon any denomination or sect. They are not, as the traditions of Twelve Step programs state, affiliated with any religious denomination or organization.

We do not have to allow anyone to badger us about religion in recovery. We do not have to allow people to make us feel ashamed, afraid, or less than because we do not subscribe to their beliefs about religion.

We do not have to let them do it to us in the name of God, love, or recovery.

The spiritual experience we will find as a result of recovery and the Twelve Steps will be our own spiritual experience. It will be a relationship with God, a Higher Power, as we understand God.

Each of us must find our own spiritual path. Each of us must build our own relationship with God, as we understand God. Each of us needs a Power greater than ourselves. These concepts are critical to recovery.

So is the freedom to choose how to do that.

Higher Power, help me know that I don't have to allow anyone to shame or badger me into religious beliefs. If they confuse that with the spirituality available in recovery, help me give their issue back to them. Help me discover and develop my own spirituality, a path that works for me. Guide me, with Divine Wisdom, as I grow spiritually.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Old 10-23-2008, 04:03 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I found spirituality in practicing the 12 steps, plain and simple. That has nothing to do with the God concept. It has to do with the way of living that AA provided me with. I do not resemble the man I was when I got sober.

What my spiritual awakening gave me:

I am at ease and at home wherever I am

I can deal with trouble and disturbance and real fear and real grief without losing my head and feeling overwhelmed.

I can learn when to hang tight and when to let go.

Pretty powerful stuff
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Old 10-23-2008, 04:29 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Meditate, watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentments and fear. (steps 10 and 11) The main one for me is selfishness and self-centeredness.

I think spiritual is as spiritual does.
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Old 10-24-2008, 04:22 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I believe It was there all along,I just used the steps to uncover and discard somethings that was hiding It,which took certain actions.

We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was
a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we
have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fear-
lessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as
we were. We found the Great Reality deep down
within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He
may be found. It was so with us.
(FIRST EDITION,ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, page 55)
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Old 10-24-2008, 04:44 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
How do I find it?
How do I do it?

I don't know where to start.
Man do I remember feeling and thinking just like that!!!

I am very thankful that I was granted the Gift Of Desperation by my HP. I was desperate enough to admit I needed help and I asked a man who had worked the steps himself to help me by being my sponsor.

What he did was he took me to the book that contains the directions for what you seek, he took me through the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous!

Starting at the very first page and going through page 164 of the BB he took me to where it says in the BB I needed to go.

The first line of the Forward to the First Edition of the Book tells us exactly the purpose of the Book.
Quote:
We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other alcoholics precisely how we have recovered is the main purpose of this book
The first line of Chapter 5 says a lot also:

Quote:
Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path.
In the Chapter "There Is A Solution" it says:

Quote:
You may already have asked yourself why it is that all of us became so very ill from drinking. Doubtless you are curious to discover how and why, in the face of expert opinion to the contrary, we have recovered from a hopeless condition of mind and body. If you are an alcoholic who wants to get over it, you may already be asking What do I have to do?"

It is the purpose of this book to answer such questions specifically. We shall tell you what we have done
Quote:
There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self- searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at out feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.

The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.
If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort.
This is simply a small part of what the BB contains, what you seek is contained in the steps and the BB thru page 164.

This is from Chapter 5:

Quote:
If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it -- then you are ready to take certain steps.
The program is simple, but it is not easy. If you want what we have, do as we have done.

I had to drop all prejudices and preconcieved ideas I had and have an open mind and a willingness to do what it took.
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Sober today thanks to AA
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Old 10-24-2008, 06:49 AM   #8 (permalink)
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PD...as i worked through the steps it helped me to find the spiritual path that I believed in.

For me...lots of reading, thinking and meditating.....

spirituality is action and committment...not an emotion...I think for a long time I thought it would be a feeling and sometimes i do have feelings about my spirituality, but that isn't really it

Look inside yourself:ghug
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:06 AM   #9 (permalink)
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The fact that you're searching for answers tells me you're working in the right direction.

That's how I started. I went looking for it. When I was ready, my HP revealed itself to me.

It took a long time. At least it seemed to me like it took a long time. I needed patience. I also needed to abandon all these preconceived notions I had about prayer and meditation. I used to think that I wasn't praying ever because I wasn't hitting my knees. I still don't hit my knees (because it doesn't work for me), but I still pray every day.

Every morning I light a ceremonial fire and consume a blessed liquid. Though to the average person it probably looks like I'm smoking a cigarette with a cup of coffee. And that's pretty much what it is. But I still have my ritual.
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Old 10-24-2008, 10:53 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Obviously I'm an intellectual so when I quote this cheesy film you can assume I saw it by accident, right?

In Owen Almighty G*d, as played by Morgan Freeman (and I don't get why he hasn't had an Oscar for that performance) says "when someone prays for patience, do you think I give them patience? Or do I give them the opportunity to be patient?"

I like that. For me, spirituality is the action I take according to the instruction I've been given. What seems to happen is that I take the actions time and time and time again, and nothing at all happens. Then eventually I realise how much has changed.

Take it easy. It'll be ok.
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Give up hope of a better past.
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Old 10-24-2008, 04:32 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Bill Wilson said the 12 step program could be summed up in 6 words:

"Trust God, Clean House, Help others."

I say the program can be summed up in 5 keystrokes:

H + B = S

Humility (a clear recognition of what & who we really are)
Benevolence (love and service)
Serenity (the deluxe edition of sobriety)
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- All Big Book quotes are from first Edition -
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Old 10-25-2008, 08:41 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by PaperDolls View Post
How do I find it?
How do I do it?

I don't know where to start.

Everything I think seems foggy and unclear. May be I don't know what I think. Or I just can't think that hard.

I know I'm making progress but some days it feels like I take 10 steps back.
The problem with so many alcoholics is that they think they can figure things out, given enough time and thought. I've learned that I can't "think" myself into the proper action, I have to "act" my way into the proper thinking.

I suggest you get to your knees and ask "whatever" is out there to help you stay sober for just today. Make it personal, just between you and whatever is out there that you can believe in. Remember, if you believe there's nothing more powerful than you, you're in the right place.
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Old 10-25-2008, 09:08 AM   #13 (permalink)
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The first 3 months I got sober, I was going to a lot of meetings...most of them were the ones the old timers went to. I liked the wisdom and serenity they had, and wanted it. I was almost 6 months sober and I was at a meeting where a woman with over 40 years had shared on the spiritual side of her program. After the meeting I asked her how I could find that spirituality that is so serene and blessed. I told I believed in a HP and prayed and read meditations, but wanted more and direction to find more. She said start off simple...every day read for 30 days, read the 3rd step...not complicate it....just read it daily...then come back and ask me what to do next. I didn't try to anaylize it, I just read it...after about 2 weeks I started to see a difference in the way I was praying and meditating...I had actually got out of my own head and just read something until it sunk in by itself. I continued to read it and when 30 days were up, I said whats next...she said read it another 30 days if I feel the need. To this day when I get to stressed out or overwhelmed and need to slow down, I start reading the 3rd step daily again. This was the key for me to at the time. Ask the oldtimers in AA if you go to meetings...they always have a suggestion
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Old 10-25-2008, 06:37 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I'm not one to speak of spiritual things. I'm not there yet myself.

But here is my hope:

"Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps ..."
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Old 10-26-2008, 01:42 PM   #15 (permalink)
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I'm not one to speak of spiritual things. I'm not there yet myself.

But here is my hope:

"Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps ..."
Hi Clutch,
Any idiot knows what he knows. It takes a smart person to know what he doesn't know. In light of your statement above, I think you're probably more spiritual than you give yourself credit for. Keep it up. The search never ends. That's why we "seek" through prayer and meditation. There's nothing in there that says we "find" it. Keep looking.
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Old 10-26-2008, 02:28 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I don't think anyone is "there yet". It is quite possible you are in the process of spiritual awakening right now, Clutch.

That goes for you too PD. "seek and you will find", what a weird thing for an atheist (me) to quote, lol.
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