Step 10 - Continuous personal inventory

[justanothrdrunk]

Step 10 - Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

I've never had any trouble taking continuous personal inventory when it came to the negative. Upon request, I can provide a long list of reasons why I'm a horrible person, what I should be doing that I'm not doing, things I'm not good at, etc.

With continued work on the 12 steps, I've become fairly comfortable in admitting when I'm wrong. It sure is easier on me when I'm not carrying guilt around for making a mistake. And when I make a mistake, I know it immediately. The sooner I admit I'm wrong, the better.

The thing I'm not so good at is giving myself credit when I do the right thing from go - when I don't make a mistake - when my mind is about to blunder but my heart takes charge and I behave like a sincere, decent human being.

In listening to others' experiences with the 10th step, I'm hearing that some also inventory the good stuff, the positive. While I agree that this is a good thing to do, I'm not so sure that it's really part of the step. Not saying it isn't either, just haven't made up my mind yet. So I want to hear what you think.

When I think of the 10th step, I sort of pair it with the 4th step. And the 4th step is all about defects. In the 4th, I list my defects in the form of behaviors from the past (negative behaviors). Continuing on with the steps, I make amends to people I have harmed. Now that I have taken care of the past, I can focus on the now so that I don't have to go too far back in time to make amends. I admit my wrongs as soon as possible (promptly).

Like I said, giving yourself credit for doing the right thing is probably helpful for recovery. But is it really part of the 10th step?

[Tazman53]

Good question. I did some reading in the BB, here are a few quotes with comments:

We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically

It may not say directly to inventory what we do right, but how would we know good things are happening automatically unless we were doing an inventory/acknowledgement of things done right.

If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense.

Is not being "God-conscious" an awareness/inventory of our rights as we do them?

If we inventory our day as we go along and also at the end of the day do we really have any choice but to see and acknowledge our good as well as our bad?

The good leaves us with a feeling of progress, the bad lets us see what we need to work on.

Although it does not direct us explicitely to take an inventory of the good, we have no choice but to see the good in ourselves.

Actually if we inventory our day we are inventorying the good and the bad, if it is good.... no action is needed, if it is bad we take action.

[ananda]

The bb talks about it as an honest evaluation of our stock and trade...An inventory involves listing what is good as well as bad. I agree the format in the bb doesn't really show anything about the positive.

I've learned to consider my inventory as a review of "what I did well today, and what I could do better".

Mostly so I don't get into the "morbid reflections" that the bb also talks about.

Works for me so far

[RufusACanal]

Any business that is interested in profit will inventory all of it's goods. When I personally inventory, I look at all areas not just those that are obviously glaring. The Big Book uses the same example.

[bballdad]

great topic!
we should give ourselves some credit,I look at it as being negative and positive about sobriety and life
I know from my personal experience if I consistently look for those negative things,I am taking away from the chance to look for the good in me and in others.I have often believed Bill switching from the positive to the negative stops us from striving and focusing for the good and keeps us putting too much focus on the negative.Focusing on the negative too much brings stress,anxiety,and takes away from the joy of sobriety today

I do a tenth step,but only when necessary....otherwise,it`s off to steps 11-12 for me

[AW2486]

The Vital Sixth Sense..

For me one of the miracles about the 10th step.. Before doing the 4th .. I lived in and loved resentments.. After getting rid of them in 4 & 5 and starting to live life on a spiritual basis.. having the continuous inventory going.. When a resentment appears .. its like oil in milk.. It doesn't belong.. It makes me extremely uncomfortable and needs to be resolved right away. My pain tolerance is extremely low now. Which is a blessing.

Great topic.

Andy

[RufusACanal]

The Fourth Step inventory in the Book assumes well that most have nothing good left to inventory and the defects must take precedent. When we grow to the point of continuous inventory we would naturally have more of a selection!

[sugErspun]

Personally - I do not list 'assets'. I just follow what the book says to do for this step:

We continue to watch for:
selfishness
dishonesty
resentment
fear

WHEN they appear (not IF) - there are a few things to do:
Ask God to remove them
Discuss it with another person
Ammend any harm.

That is the tenth step.

My practice is evolving - I need to talk with another more often about these things when they come up and not be the arbiter of what qualifies as being 'discussable' and 'not discussable' (major vs minor etc). I recently heard someone share on a very specific tenth step practice which involves tracking these things daily and doing a summary of them all once per week with their sponsor (he is sober many years and still does this once per week) - his experience with this made it attractive and I am going to do something similair.

Any lengths.

[bballdad]

When I do a written10th step, I do a deeper and more though one than I used to,especially on fear,the evil and corroding thread.....I dig deep following the thread,layer after layer and see character defects and other stuff.I would like to add that there is more to the Spiritual life than the first 164 pages of the Big Book,it is just a beginning....

[lizw]

Originally Posted by justanothrdrunk

Like I said, giving yourself credit for doing the right thing is probably helpful for recovery. But is it really part of the 10th step?

I think you can make it part of your step 10, if you wanted too. As well as doing what the BB suggests.

In the last few months I have been trying to remember (when I retire at night) all the good things I do in a day too. I.e. spend time with my daughter. Not in an egomanic kind of way, but a sensible well balanced kinda way.

It still feels a bit weird but makes me feel good, and doesn't appear to do me any harm. Might hurt my daughter though, cause then I want to spend more time with her. Lol.

[Spiritual Seeker]

Justanothrdrunk- great topic
Your questioning implies that you are still growing and flourishing in recovery...fantastic!!

My son has been an inpatient at rehab for five and one-half months now.
He mentioned that he's listed over three hundred resentments.
I thought about this and I couldn't think of a single resentment for myself
( now character defects, I can make a considerable list there)
Building up resentments must be part of the " stinkin' thinkin' that I hear about with addicts/alcoholics.
For whatever reason, it has been easy for me to live in forgiveness rather than bitterness and resentment.

Luckily if we are holding a resentment, we can SIMPLY ask for relief, for peace of mind, in the present moment and then shift our energy to where it can do some good.

[jimhere]

The Tenth Step is not about what I do at night or even about writing. That is the Eleventh Step. Eleven is about what I do in the morning and at night and Ten is about staying awake through out the day.

And the Tenth Step is much more than taking inventory. There are certain practices involved. Watching is an ancient time honored spiritual practice. It simply means being awake, or in a state of prayerful attention. When these things crop up, I can name them, I don't have to walk around all screwed up, wondering what's wrong with me.

The next practice is pausing. (In this respect 10 & 11) are intertwined. When I become agitated, I pause. Usually I just breathe when I do this. Try this-why wait until you are agitated to pause? Try pausing throughtout the day, like after each task. Pause for a few moments and just breathe.

After pausing is prayer Although pausing itself is prayer). I ask God at once to remove these things. Maybe I can discuss them with someone immediately, but not always. Adam's practice of discussing them once a week with a spiritual advisor is a good idea.

The next practice is amending, that is if I've caused harm.

The next practice is turning, or resolutely turning my thoughts away from the problem to God. Emmett Fox says that whatever we devote our attention to becomes our God. If I am being selfish, dishonest, have a resentment, or am afraid, I am into self. The book says to turn my thoughts to someone I can help, and any thought or consideration along these lines is prayer. In fact, thought is prayer. I just usually turn my thoughts to God. Emmett Fox calls this "The Golden Key," and I have to resolutely, or use an act of my will to do this. This is proper use of the will.

Ten and Eleven are what the book means when it says to vigoursly commence to make this a way of living. When I can live in Ten and Eleven, Twelve happens. Of course I don't do it perfectly. I still write a lot of four-column inventory and make many mistakes.

In regards to a positive inventory. There is a question in the 11th Step nightly review. "What did I pack into the stream of life today?" In other words, in what areas did I do God's will today? Usually at least one small thing a day, like practice courtesy, maybe a kind word, something like that.
Jim

Big Book references from Alcoholics Anonymous, First Edition

[BP44]

Thanks Jim. This is the type of share we never hear about in the rooms. I had the misconception that 10 was something I needed to do at home, at night and only episodically, blah, blah, blah. Cause that's the level of the sharing I always heard. Mark H puts it beautifully......If you find yourself in the middle of the road, and an 18 wheeler is bearing down on you, that's not the time to try and figure out how you got there. The 10th step is about MOVE!!! Now!!! Away from the force. Into power. The 10th step begins the moment my hand hits the doorknob and begin interacting with the world. It gives me clear, precise intructions on how to conduct myself throughout my day. Watch, ask, turn, cease, pause. This is a strict spiritual daily discipline as is 11. If I'm not doing this then I must have a belief system that says either I don't have to do this to stay sober, or I know what the day "at certain times" is gonna look like.

[Rob B]

What a refreshing thread to come upon, practical application of step work in our daily lives, good deal. I don't have anything to add to the excellent shares other than an observation. No one has mentioned booze or not drinking "just for today" I suspect that it is because folks who practice the spiritual life benefit from the promise "The problem has been removed".

In my experience All the promises in the Big Book have been byproducts of seeking a relationship with God, not the other way around: I enjoy and have been learning a bit about scripture. A verse from Matthew seems applicable.

Matthew 6:33 states,"But seek ye first the kingdom of God,and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you."

[bballdad]

ty Rob

[Tazman53]

Rob an awesome observation, funny thing that booze is not even mentioned, but in applying the steps to all areas of my life, the booze no longer even enters into the equation.......... could it be:

And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone, even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned.

Has come true? LOL

[Spiritual Seeker]

Letting go + surrender...

Monumental lesson I've been applying on how to live my life.
Funny thing, the more I surrender...the more I get as a reward.